Dealing with Conflict Relationships

What is Conflict? Conflict is a disagreement or struggle between two or more people. It happens in ALL relationships, especially those where we are very close to the other person. Role Conflict occurs when differing views of role expectations do not match. Although conflict is not good, it can help strengthen a relationship by showing each other that situations can be worked out.

3 reasons conflict occur Situational Conflict: short-lived conflicts about common problems of daily life. We solve it quickly and move on. Personality Difference: Differences in our personalities cause conflict, which can be daily to “forever”. Problems can be small or big. Power Struggles: Issues are important to both sides and we get caught up in wanting CONTROL over the other person’s behavior, which causes the struggle.

More Conflict Reasons NO MATTER THE CONFLICT, it will either be CONSTRUCTIVE or DESTRUCTIVE Constructive—people work together to resolve leaving everyone feeling satisfied with the end result Destructive—people simply attack and find no resolve Think about all 3 reasons people get into to conflicts. Which ones happen most in your life and why?

Fighting Fair Around the room there are signs that have the blank on your Fighting Fair worksheet filled in. Walk around the room and fill in your worksheet.

Ways to Resolve Resolving conflict is always a work in progress. It is something that we must practice and attempt to get better at on a daily basis. There are many things a person must take into consideration before resolving conflict to ensure the problem gets solved. Things to think about before you start resolving: Is it the right time? Do I know why I am really upset? What am I willing to give up? What do I want in the end?

Steps to Resolve If you have decided that you are ready to resolve, follow these simple steps: Identify the problem Use I Messages as well as Active Listening to help better understand one another Together, think of ways to solve the problem Generate different solutions/ideas. Hear both sides Evaluate each solution offered to solve Ask yourself, will it work? What might pros and cons be?

More Steps Decide on best solution (together) Find a solution that you both agree to. Compromise. Implement the solution Carry out what was decided. Change. Try a new way Evaluate or Check Back in Find time to talk to the other person to see how you are both feeling about the resolution.

What skills are needed to deal? Having good communication is essential in solving conflict. Here are some skills necessary to be good at resolving conflict: Listening Empathy Feedback Clarification Talking Emotional Control Control Physical Reactions Using Respectful Language

What if you just don’t want to deal? Some of us simply do not like conflict. If you are one of those people, consider the following: Don’t let others irritate you Focus on the positive Change the subject Don’t let others intimidate you or provoke you into fighting Walk away Ask yourself….is it really necessary for me to share my thoughts???

You can also…. SET BOUNDARIES