DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE SIMPLE STRATEGIES TO SUCCESSFUL OUTCOMES

Today Why people are difficult Types of difficult people Strategies to deal with difficult people How to stay calm

Why people are difficult There are many reasons: Personality type Background, education, upbringing Life experience Having a bad day Sometimes – medical conditions Difficult people are a challenge but can be effectively managed

Types of difficult people Aggressive people Victimised people Rude and abusive people Pushy people

Aggressive people They want their own way They always want to “win” They tend to dominate They: Talk over others Don’t listen Can be rude and offensive Aggressive people are looking for reward and recognition

Dealing with aggressive people Remain calm Let them ‘vent’ Use active listening skills Show them you are trying to understand Show them there is more than one way

Victimised people They feel they are always victims They like to blame They complain no one listens Explanations are always incomplete There is lots of whining and moaning They waste a lot of time Victimised people feel they have no control

Dealing with victimised people Listen to their complaints Use active listening Let them know you understand their problem Force them to prioritise their problems Help them choose a course of action Avoid visiting the past

Rude and abusive people Use fear to get their own way They want their own way at any price Want to control and dominate Want to protect themselves Will use blame and bad language to intimidate

Dealing with rude & abusive people Stand your ground Say their name until they listen Don’t put up with rudeness Ask them to clarify their first point Stick to the main problem Be consistent Avoid opportunities for sarcasm Stay calm

Pushy people Want their own way Try to dominate in various ways Try to shift blame to divert attention from themselves Use aggressiveness to hide inadequacies

Dealing with pushy people Remain calm, firm and polite Don’t just give in Acknowledge their concerns and gain their trust Actively listen and restate understanding Avoid blame or becoming defensive

How to stay calm Before dealing with a difficult client: Prepare - plan your strategy Do role plays with team members Plan for different scenarios While dealing with a difficult client: Breathe normally Don’t take it personally Stay focussed on the point Don’t become defensive or aggressive Avoid tensing up – keep your shoulders relaxed

Summary When dealing with difficult people: Stay calm Actively listen and uncover the core problem Don’t get defensive or aggressive Look for solutions - not blame Stay on the key point Be consistent