Laura Noel – Chair of CCIWBS Our service and its history. The referral process and waiting times

Referrals - from Professionals or Self-referral We will offer you an appointment to talk about your experience and what support we might be able to offer. The office is open between 9.30 and 5 p.m. There is an answer machine. CCIWBS 6-8 York Mews London NW5 2UJ TEL: EM: counselling.org

Registered Charity No FROM OUR COMMUNITY, SERVING OUR COMMUNITY Camden, City, Islington & Westminster Bereavement Service (CCIWBS) is an independent registered charity, founded in Over the years, thousands of bereaved people have experienced the ongoing counselling support we provide. People who contact us may have experienced bereavement in many different circumstances - a miscarriage or a still birth, the loss of a child, partner, lover, parent, friend, relation or colleague, in many different circumstances. The deaths may have been caused by illness, accident, suicide, murder or ‘natural causes”. Not everyone needs counselling support but in our modern world the old supports of family, friends and community are not always available. The service is available, free, to any adult (over 18) registered with a GP, in the boroughs of; Camden, Islington, Westminster, or the City of London and who for those who live, work in any of those boroughs but registered with a GP elsewhere, then we can offer affordable counselling We offer a confidential service, which is open to anyone, regardless of age, sexuality, ethnic origin, culture or religion. In particular, we are committed to providing support to people who are not used to seeking help through counselling. Appointments are available during the day or in the evening, either in our offices in Kentish Town or, if required, at one of a number of GP practices across the area. ABOUT BEREAVEMENT Bereavement is something which most of us will experience at some time in our lives. Whilst no two people react in the same way, you may find it helpful to have some information about some of the more common emotions which can be experienced after a death. It’s important to recognize that sometimes a bereaved person may not be able to grieve at the time of their loss. It is not unusual for unresolved feelings to emerge later, often provoked by another loss or life event. There are four recognizable stages: Immediate reaction – shock and disbelief This may last for a few days or sometimes several weeks. You may find you have been very calm and detached during this time, able to deal with the business of organizing the funeral or dealing with admin. Alternatively, many people feel unable to cope with simple tasks and feel completely at sea. Both these reactions are normal.

Being unable to accept the loss This often involves what has been described as ‘searching behaviour’. This means that on some level you are trying to deny that the death has occurred. You may think you have heard or seen the dead person or, if you used to call them regularly, you may perhaps find yourself picking up the phone to tell them something. Sometimes you may feel you have seen the person in the street or even find yourself looking for him or her. Again, this behavior is not unusual following a bereavement. Despair and desperation During this time – often the longest stage of bereavement – you may find that you have lost all interest in living and feel there is no point in going on. The intensity of these emotions can be overwhelming and you may be unable to see any possibility of things changing in the future. This can be a very painful experience and many grieving people speak of a deep sense of hopelessness. Reorganisation Gradually, over a period of time, the pain may ease a little and you may find yourself being able to remember without necessarily feeling overcome by sadness. This can be a time for you to begin life again and it’s important to renew old interests and take up new pursuits. If they are able to start enjoying aspects of life again, some people feel disloyal to the person who has died. It can seem like a betrayal of their memory, that their love for the person has faded and that they are being forgotten. However, what happened in the past is always an important part of you and enjoying your present and future life cannot affect what has gone before. How you can help yourself Grief is often far from straightforward and so as well as feeling unhappy you must also be prepared to feel any of the following: guilt, panic, fear, self-pity and anger, even towards the person you have lost. Many people also experience a loss of confidence and their usual coping skills and feel they need to hide this. However, this too is part of grief and it’s important that you share your feelings with a supportive listener. You may feel convinced that your friends are avoiding you. Unfortunately this often happens and is probably due to embarrassment – ‘not knowing what to say’. It may be up to you to take the first step to let them know you need their support. Wanting to run away Bereavement is a time of very painful and confusing emotions but it’s necessary to experience these in order to begin to build your life again. It is often very tempting to make major changes to your life, for example, moving house or disposing of possessions. However, it may be more helpful to take time to weigh up these decisions, to avoid future regrets about having acted too hastily. Overcoming isolation As well as feeling emotional pain, it is not uncommon to feel physically run down or find it difficult to eat, sleep or concentrate. Eventually these symptoms will ease. Only if they persist for a long time should you be concerned and seek the support of your doctor. Grief is a very individual process and you will have your own unique experience, so don’t feel abnormal if your feelings do not follow the pattern outlined above. Equally, it is a very isolating process – it feels as if no one else could possibly understand. However, it may help you to remember that millions of others have gone through this very difficult experience – and have survived. WHAT IS COUNSELLING? We offer an opportunity to meet regularly, one to one, with someone experienced in working with bereavement, who will listen to your experience, give you time to talk about how you’re feeling now and support you as you begin to live your life again.

Bereavement counselling is offered by trained and supervised volunteer counsellors on a regular weekly basis for an hour a week. Funding Along with funding for contracts from local health care organisations, the Service relies on donations from charitable trusts, fundraising events and individual donations. Confidentiality For Camden clients: Camden uses an electronic database to assist clients in receiving the most appropriate support and as a means of collecting anonymous data for commissioners. Your details will be entered into this database unless you choose to opt out. Contacting the Service You may be referred by your GP, a social worker or community nurse. Alternatively, you can simply contact us yourself by phone or and we will offer you an appointment to meet a member of staff to talk about your experience and what support we might be able to offer. The office is open between 9.30 and 5 p.m. Outside these hours, please leave a message on the answerphone and we will contact you during the next working day. Address: CCIWBS 6-8 York Mews London NW5 2UJ Office tel: website: