Through Teaching Conflict Resolution Skills Joseph H. Davis, LCCC, Project REACH

 Bullying is growing problem in our schools and communities today.  Victims of bullying suffer long-term effects, such as depression, lower socio-economic achievement, poor school performance, poor school attendance, higher drop out rate and stress related health issues. (Olweus)  Many past programs that schools have tried have failed. ( Twenlow)  Effective programs do work, if conducetd well!

 The “one shot deal” will not work!  Assembly  Guest Speaker  Week of……  Poster contest  Ignoring it and it goes away  Discipline only for bullies  Counseling Bullies  We learned this from D/A education. Any one remember Frank Toma? 

 Long-term term approach ( humans learn over time, bullying and conflict change with age). Father Guido Sarducci’s “Five Minute University is a comedy routine!  Bullying prevention and Conflict Resolution need to be a priority and a commitment.  “All Aboard” approach, all staff, families and students need to be involved in the on-going training. NO WEAK LINKS!  Schools need to change policies!  Schools and communities need to commit to doing things in a different manner.  Schools need to be accountable.

 Bullying is an intentional act of hurtful behavior. It can be verbal, physical, shunning/excluding, teasing, tickling, intimidation through body language and other acts that either physically of emotionally hurt.  Bullying can be done by one person to another or by groups.  Bullying involves power.  Bullying varies by gender: Males tend to be physical, females more psychological (although this is starting to change).  Bullying tends to happen away from the eyes of adults ( we will discuss when we talk about audits)

 Bullies are usually students who are average or above average in intelligence and academic skills.  Bullies have a positive self image ( often inflated).  Bullies have friends.  Bullies are usually physically bigger and stronger.  Bullies are skilled at getting their own way.  Bullies often have a high social status in schools (leaders through intimidation)  Bullies often have parents who are bullies.  Bullies get satisfaction from their actions.

 Those identified as bullies by middle school have a 60% greater chance of being convicted of a crime by the age of 25 then non-bullies.  Bullies have a greater chance of being abusers in relationships.  Sad to say: At a major university, 63% of football players on scholarships have had convictions against them, maybe bullies have a better chance of playing college football!  A player in the NBA was arrested for attempted manslaughter, found guilty and sentenced to prison. The State Governor (an alumnus of Georgetown University, granted this person a pardon to attend Georgetown). This person played basketball at Georgetown for one year on a full scholarship, although he did not graduate from high school.

 There are two types of victims:  Passive-smaller, immature, lacking defense, lacking peer support, non-assertive  Provocative- harder to identify, often a student who irritates others ( teachers included), tries to fight back.

 Students need a clear definition of bullying (this will vary by age).  School needs to conduct a school wide “bullying audit”, Who? Where? When?  Schools must respond to the audit with an action plan.  Schools must come up with a firm policy on dealing with bullies within their code of conduct.  Classes must have weekly “town meetings” to openly discuss bullying. Reports of bullying must go to administration for investigation and action. Administration must account for their reactions.  Victims and their families are to be informed of administrations response.  Can you see why school want to go back to “what fails?

 Teaching Conflict Resolution Skills Define Conflict…..as an adult….as a child. Define Resolution

 “If Conflict Were a Color?”  What does the conflict peacock look like?  What does that tell us about conflict?  How conflict effects us ?  What do we gain by teaching students to resolve conflicts?

 The Webs of Conflict  “I have conflicts most often with…..”  Process…..  When I’m in conflict I usually…..  Process…..

 I statements  I feel______________  When you___________  I want you to___________, please!  The simple power of assertiveness!  Remember all feelings are o.k. And “like is not a felling”.

 Communication Blockers  70% 23% 7%  Verbal  Tone of Voice  Body Language

 Instruct drawling fig.# 1- Yes/No only  Instruct drawling fig.# 2-Open Ended  Instruct drawling fig # 3 Open Ended with dialog

 Blind Puzzle  Variation: Snake Pit

 C  A  P  S

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