Developing your Self-Esteem

 The ability to accept yourself and others, express and manage emotions and deal with the demands and challenges you meet in your life.  Having good mental/emotional health is an important part of your total health.

 Lesson 1,question1)  Sense of Belonging  Sense of purpose  Positive outlook  Self-sufficiency  Healthy self-esteem

 When you believe you can succeed  When you master new challenges  Praise for mastering a task or are reassured while trying  Developing positive self talk

 Feel proud of yourself and your abilities, skills and accomplishments.  You believe setbacks are temporary  You are confident to confront challenges and overcome them.  You are not afraid to try new things  They don’t see themselves as a failure

 (Lesson 1-question 2)  Avoid criticizing yourself, or spending time with people who criticize you.  Set realistic expectations.  Don’t expect yourself to be perfect  Choose friends who value and respect you.  Focus on positive aspects about yourself.  See page 69 for the rest of the list.

 (Lesson 1-question 3)  Level 1- Physical  Level 2- Safety  Level 3- Belonging  Level 4- Feeling recognized  Level 5- Reaching potential- Self- actualization.

 Sense of yourself as a unique individual ◦ Identity development  Recognizing your likes and dislikes  Influence by relationships and experiences with family and friends  Values and beliefs  Identify with a role model  Shared characteristics and your unique qualities form your identity

 Character-the distinctive qualities that describe how a person thinks, feels, and behaves.  Good character is an outward expression of inner values.  Traits of a good Character ◦ Trustworthiness ◦ Respect ◦ Responsibility ◦ Fairness ◦ Caring ◦ Citizenship

 Recognize your strengths and weaknesses ◦ Be honest and realistic ◦ Evaluate weaknesses without being critical ◦ Set realistic goals  Demonstrate positive values  Develop a purpose in your life  Form Meaningfull relationships Family, friends, peers, co-workers, teamates  Avoid unhealthful High-risk behaviors  Contribute to the community

 Understanding your emotions ◦ Emotions- signals that tell your mind and body how to react ◦ Hormones are chemicals produced by your glands that regulate the activities of different body cells. They can cause emotions to swing from one extreme to another. ◦ Common emotions (lesson 3 question 2)  Happiness, sadness, love, fear, guilt, anger (hostility)

 EMOTIONS ARE NEITHER GOOD OR BAD.  They way your express your emotions can produce good or bad consequences. ◦ Dealing with emotions in a positive way  Empathy-supports a friend  Why do I feel the way I feel?  Will this event matter tomorrow, next week, etc?  Why should I wait before responding?  What can I do to feel better?  Who can I ask to help me deal with my negative feelings?

 Lesson 3-question 3)  Deep breaths  Counting back from 10  Relaxation techniques  Getting away from the situation  Writing in a private journal  Talking to someone you trust ◦ Defense Mechanisms- mental processes that protect individuals from strong or stressful emotions and situations.(lesson3, question 4)  Repression, regression, denial, projection, suppression, rationalization, compensation. Pg. 81

 Dealing with fear- ◦ Recognize where the fear is coming from ◦ What is causing the fear ◦ Admitting that you are afraid ◦ Seek help  Dealing with guilt- ◦ A destructive emotion and if not managed it can harm your self esteem. ◦ Some situations are out of your control- ie. divorce

 Take a deep breath or slowly repeat calming words or phrase.  Remove yourself from the situation  Do something to relax  Channel your energy in a different direction  Talk to someone you trust

Chapter 4

 Stress is natural and not all bad!  Stress is the reaction of the body and mind to everyday challenges and demands.  Distress and Eustress  Stress and Perception which is the act of becoming aware through the senses.  Reaction to stressful events depends on your previous experiences.

 Stress can be positive and negative.  Positive stress can motivate you.  Stress has a negative effect when it interferes with your ability to perform.  Negative stress can cause you to feel distracted, overwhelmed, impatient, frustrated and even angry.

 Stressor- anything that causes stress. They can be real or imagined, anticipated or unexpected. ◦ People ◦ Objects ◦ Places ◦ Events ◦ Situations ◦ See page 94 – figure 4.2 Stressors in teens

 Stress response ◦ Alarm  Fight or flight response ◦ Resistance  Body adapts and reacts to stressor ◦ Fatigue  Body looses ability to adapt  You begin to feel tired loose the ability to manage other stressors.

 Prolonged stress can lead to: ◦ Psychosomatic response- a physical reaction that results from stress rather from an injury or illness.  Headache  Weakened immune system  Bruxism- clenching of jaw or grinding teeth  Digestive disorders  Mental effects include  Difficulty concentrating  Irritability  Mood swings

 When does stress become a problem? ◦ Addictive-builds over time ◦ Physical and mental toll ◦ Chronic stress- stress associated with long-term problems that are beyond a person’s control  Can become a constant burden that can last for months.  YOU CANNOT ELIMINATE STRESS ALL TOGETHER FROM YOUR LIFE!!!!!!

 Refusal skills  Plan ahead  Think positive Handling stress and reducing it’s effects Relaxation techniques stretching, pleasant thoughts, laughing, massage (Relaxation response- state of calm) Redirect your energy creative project, exercise, etc. Seek support

 Get adequate rest ◦ Lack of sleep affects school work, athletics, ect. ◦ 8 to 9 hours of sleep  Get Regular exercise ◦ Can release pent up energy and clear your mind. ◦ Increase your energy, endurance and helps you sleep better.  Eat nutritious food ◦ Poor eating habits can contribute to stress. Causing weakness, fatigue and reduced ability to concentrate. ◦ Over eating, under-eating, caffeine, sugar or quick energy all can contribute to stress,

 Being able to adapt effectively and recover from disappointment, difficulty, or crises.  BOUNCING BACK

 Acknowledging loss and grief will help you begin the healing process. This in turn will help you to cope (dealing successfully with difficult changes in your life) with the loss and manage your feelings.  Stages of grief are a variety of reaction that may surface as an individual makes sense of how a loss affects them

 Mourning- The act of showing sorrow or grief.  Mourning may include: ◦ Talking about the person ◦ Experiencing the pain of the loss ◦ Searching for meaning  Dwelling on things that can’t be changed will only add to the hurt. Think about how the relationship was positive in your life.

 Denial  Emotional release  Anger  Bargaining  Depression  Remorse  Acceptance  Hope

 Showing Support ◦ Help person recall happy, positive memories ◦ Be a sympathetic listener ◦ Use silence appropriately ◦ Don’t rush the grieving process ◦ Don’t attempt to resolve the person’s grief in one day

 Traumatic event- any event that has a stressful impact sufficient to overwhelm your normal coping strategies.  Sudden and shocking ◦ Accidents ◦ Violent assaults ◦ Suicides ◦ Natural disasters  Seek support from family and friends  Community groups or agencies