Child Sexual Abuse- What Parents Need to Know Danielle Mosher, BA Coordinator of Prevention & Advocacy Sexual Assault Service Center Guardian Angel Community Services

Child Sexual Abuse (CSA) The sexual exploitation or victimization of a child by an adult or older child Examples: Abusers touches the child sexually Child is forced to touch the abuser Forcing a child to watch pornography Watching a child undress or bathe*** Exposing oneself to a child Performing sexual acts on or with a child

Statistics One in four girls and one in six boys are sexually abused before the age of 18. The largest number of sexually abused children are between the ages of 8 and 11 years old Children with disabilities are four times more likely to be abused than those without Once a child has been abused they are at an increased risk of being abused again

Statistics It is estimated that only 1 in 10 victims of child sexual abuse ever disclose their abuse ≥90% of victims know their perpetrators Men who abuse girls average 19.8 victims; Men who abuse boys average 150.2 victims

Effects of CSA Shame Guilt/Self-Blame Difficulty trusting others Low self-esteem Cognitive deficits Depression Mental health problems PTSD (Rape Trauma Syndrome) Poor school performance Re-victimization Unhealthy relationships Self harm Substance abuse Suicide

Erin’s Law Illinois Law requiring: Child sexual abuse and assault awareness and prevention PreK-12th grade public school students Named after Erin Merryn

Perpetrators Anyone can be a perpetrator Females Fathers, step-fathers and father figures most common Girls in homes with mom’s live-in boyfriend or male family friend are most at risk Perpetrators look for single mothers-gain access **Stranger Danger** Females commit 20-44% of abuse against boys, 5% of abuse against females

Perpetrators and Grooming Grooming: a process of manipulation, deceit, bribery and/or force used by child sexual abuse perpetrators Perpetrators are SKILLED manipulators Perpetrators not only work to gain trust of child but also of parent/guardian Internet Predators**

Grooming Tactics Compliments and Flattery Offer friendship and protection Treat the child as older than they are May initiate abuse by playing games Intimidation Secrecy

Indicators of CSA Physical: STD’s in a child Pregnancy at an early age Frequent UTI’s Genital injuries Blood in underwear

Indicators of CSA (cont.) Behavioral Sexual knowledge that is not age appropriate Sexualized play/language Changes in behavior Toileting accidents Aversion to go home Child discloses abuse

Preventing Child Sexual Abuse Open communication Body parts Safe touch/unsafe touch Safe secrets/unsafe secrets Self-esteem Respect children’s boundaries Intuition

Preventing CSA (cont.) Some Parts Are Not For Sharing Recommended books: Some Parts Are Not For Sharing Those Are My Private Parts Your Body Belongs to You

Reasons Children Don’t Tell Don’t know abuse is wrong May feel good Are told it is ok Feel it is their fault Don’t know who/how to tell Love/care for the perpetrator Threatened by perpetrator Fear they won’t be believed Afraid of hurting people/getting people in trouble

Domestic Violence Domestic Violence A pattern of physically, sexually, and/or emotionally abusive or controlling behavior. The violence can be aimed towards ADULTS AND CHILDREN. Physical (Hitting, kicking, choking, slapping) Emotional (Put-downs, controlling behavior, isolation, name-calling) Digital (checking phone/e-mail, harassing phone calls/texts, insults via social media) Sexual (assault, molestation, sexual harassment) Physical: Includes threats of harm to self or others, playing rough Emotional: Isolation, Jealous, Possessiveness, Put Downs, Double Standard, Name Calling, Controlling Behaviors Sexual: ANY unwanted sexual contact: kissing, hugging, fondling, reproductive manipulation Digital: Facebook, constant texting, searching someone’s phone

Statistics Every 9 seconds in the US a woman is assaulted or beaten. Around the world, at least one in every three women has been beaten, coerced into sex or otherwise abused during her lifetime. Most often, the abuser is a member of her own family. Domestic violence is the leading cause of injury to women—more than car accidents, muggings, and rapes combined. Studies suggest that up to 10 million children witness some form of domestic violence annually. Nearly 1 in 5 teenage girls who have been in a relationship said a boyfriend threatened violence or self-harm if presented with a breakup.

The Cycle of Violence Honeymoon Tension Building Violence/Explosion Back to Honeymoon

Where Can I Get Help Sexual Assault Service Center (815)730-8984 Groundwork Domestic Violence Program (815)729- 1228 Danielle Mosher, BA 815-729-0930, ext. 1536 dmosher@gacsprograms.org