FOSTERING HEALTHLY REALTIONSHIPS IN OUR CHILDREN NORWOOD SCHOOL September 24, 2009
Overview Best Friend Activity Where do positive relationships start? Importance of relationships… Differences in relationships… Why friendship is so important… What does a healthy relationship look like.. How to assist with Friendship issues…
List 5 things that make your best friend the best…
Where do relationships start… In the womb Starts in the home Modeled Encouraged Self-Esteem Development Boundaries
Importance of Relationships Survival Sense of Belonging Acceptance Self-Image Face New Challenges Trust, Empathy, Compassion, Generosity and Conscience Supporting Development of curiosity, self- direction, persistence, cooperation, caring and conflict resolution skills.
Differences in Relationships Parental Sibling Friends
Why Friendship is so important… LLatest research states friendships are more significant in our children’s lives than thought before FFriendships assist our children in navigating the rough waters of their social development
Importance of Friendship Friends not only influence our children but lay the groundwork for: Adult Relationships Health Well-Being Career Choice Self-Esteem Life Parent How they will parent their children
The looks of a healthy relationship… What does a healthy relationship look like to you? Do you want the same for your child/children? How can we develop the understanding of a healthy relationship within our children?
How do you assist with friendship issues… Reflection: how do you currently handle friendship issues with your child/children? Do you want to make a change or is this method working for you? If you wish to change, how and when?
How to assist with relationship issues… Be open and ready to listen Ask what questions not why Remember it is not your problem to solve Talk about the issue with your child not to your child Come up with solutions together (preferably the child comes up the solution)
How to assist continued… Talk about why people behave in the ways they do (power, attention, revenge, avoidance) Empathize with and acknowledge your child’s feelings (but remember not to try and fix it) Ask your child how you can help or what they need (you may find they just need to express their emotions or want you to hug them)
How to assist continued… Follow up with the solution or plan to find out how it is going (you may need to work on further problem solving solution) You may need to ask if there is an issue (be mindful of how you ask) Be patient and a good role model Remember – in the moment it is hard, but these are opportunities for needed social skills acquirement
Questions???
Resources Nobody Likes Me Everybody Hates Me: The Top 25 Friendship Problems by Michele Borba Best Friends, Worst Enemies: Understanding the Social Lives of Children by Michael Thompson and Catherine O’Neill Grace The Friendship Factor: Helping Our Children Navigate Their Social World – and Why It Matters for Their Success and Happiness by Kenneth H. Rubin “Why Doesn’t Anybody Like Me?” A Guide to Raising Socially Confident Kids by Hara Estroff Marano