Listening Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around. -Leo Buscaglia

Exam 1 is done! Paper 2 is almost due! A week from today

Take Home Points Listening is an important skill HURIER Model You don’t need to know the percentages Do know the ranking of skills used/taught HURIER Model What is comprehensive listening? Active listening? Empathic listening? Steps of empathic listening What is paraphrasing and the steps of it? Why is paraphrasing both feelings and content important?

What does it mean to be a “good” listener? Sally is sitting in class, listening to what Lisa is saying. Lisa asks the question about what it means to be a good listener and Sally starts thinking about people that she thinks are good listeners and why. Is Sally listening? Talk about goals and situational context

Why care about listening? Relationships Winokur found: “the inability or unwillingness to listen is a major detriment to relationships” Healthcare The healthcare profession is notorious for doctors that interrupt patients within the first 18 seconds of interacting. Leadership Direct connection between actual leadership effectiveness and listening effectiveness (Steil & Brommelje, 2004) Business Executives estimate that 60% of business errors are a direct result of poor listening (Cooper, 1997)

Listening Contexts We spend more time listening than any other form of communication General Population 45% listening 30% speaking 16% reading 9% writing College Students 55% listening 17% speaking 16% reading 11% writing

Teaching Communication Skills When Learned Extent Used Extent Taught Listening 1st 4th Speaking 2nd 3rd Reading Writing

HURIER Model (partially in book) Hearing Discriminating, focusing, and concentrating on the right sounds Understanding The ability to apply meaning to the sounds that you receive Remembering The ability to recall what has been heard

HURIER Model (partially in book) Interpreting Consideration of context and the other person’s perspective Evaluating Applying personal perceptual filters to judge the merit and perspective of the message Responding Delivering an appropriate response to the message

HURIER Listening Test Take it! Evaluating listening skills from your own perspective Brownell, J. (2006). Listening: Attitudes, Principles, and Skill (3rd ed.). Pearson, NY. Pages 32 to 34. This is the book I have

HURIER Listening Test What was your weakest/strongest area? Why is this test not necessarily the best test of your skills? What can you do to improve upon your weakest area? Feedback!

Discussion Questions Does listening always require conscious effort? Is response a necessary component of listening? Does it have to be an obvious response?

Types of Listening Comprehensive Listening Active Listening Empathic Listening

Comprehensive Listening Receiving and remembering new information Which part of the HURIER model does this relate to?

Active Listening Responding so that speakers know that you are listening Eye contact Nodding and smiling Asking for clarification Encouraging others to express their thoughts Which part of the HURIER model does this relate to?

Empathic Listening Allowing a partner to talk out their problems Don’t give advice! Don’t be evaluative! Offering support Which part of the HURIER model does this relate to?

Improving Empathic Listening 1) Respect other’s point of view Focus on other person, not yourself Perspective taking 2) Make sure you fully understand what the other person said before responding Don’t interrupt Ask questions

Improving Empathic Listening 3) Check your understanding by paraphrasing Paraphrase: an attempt to verify your understanding of a message by putting it in your own words (perception checking!) Content paraphrase: a response that conveys your understanding of the denotative meaning of a verbal message Feelings paraphrase: a response that conveys your understanding of a speaker’s state of mind – the emotions behind the words

Paraphrase Examples Statement: “I felt really good about my revised paper because I thought the changes I made really improved my explanation. My advisor said he couldn’t really see any difference between this draft and the first.: Content: “So, your advisor thought you hadn’t done much work, but you put a lot of effort into it and thought it was much better?” Feelings: “It seems that you’re really frustrated that your advisor didn’t recognize the changes you made.”

Discussion Question Why is it important to address feelings as well as content?

Try it! “But then when I went over there, I saw him sitting with Britney! I can’t believe his nerve.” Content paraphrase? Feelings paraphrase?

When do you use paraphrasing? When you need a better understanding of message in terms of content, feelings or both When misunderstanding the message will have serious consequences When the message is long and complex When the message seems to reflect emotional strain When talking with a non-native speaker of English

Empathic Listening “I hate my physics class; everyone is smarter than I am. I’m going to fail. I don’t know why you hang around with an idiot like me.” What is the underlying issue that you need to address as an empathic listener?

Take Home Points Listening is an important skill HURIER Model You don’t need to know the percentages Do know the ranking of skills used/taught HURIER Model What is comprehensive listening? Active listening? Empathic listening? Steps of empathic listening What is paraphrasing and the steps of it? Why is paraphrasing both feelings and content important?

Listening Reflection Paper See Canvas Assignment

Exam 1 Class average was a You cannot keep your exams