TEACHING ORDER TO YOUR 7/8 YEAR OLD SON.

WHAT IS ORDER?  Order is a virtue. It is an inner-directed and habitual strength of mind and will.

WHAT DOES IT INVOLVE?  Order involves allocation of resources(time, space, energy, attention etc) to activities and things. We allocate these resources so that we can get the best return on investment, so that we can do more, achieve more with less effort and also so that we can give glory to God.

WHAT IS ORDER?  Sometimes we parents assume that children will pick up virtues as they grow up and therefore we have no strategy for teaching them. This is a mistake. A good habit is acquired through repetition of acts related to the habit. Children do not usually perform good actions by chance, they need to be taught, motivated and helped to do them so that later they will do them on their own.

Common order related problems that affect success in school.  Missing equipments-books, pencils, rulers.  Lost uniform items- sweaters, socks, ties, whole sports bags, shoes etc.  Bags left outside after breaks- boys ask for permission to go looking for them.  Habitual lateness in the morning.  Desks- that are completely out of order as far as books and papers are concerned.  Revision -not done due to lack of time.  Homework- not done or presented.

Some actions related to order.  Routine;- Mealtimes, bedtimes, homework time- measured and fixed, departure time etc- punctuality.  Material order;- keeping everything in the cupboard- a place for sweaters, shirts, jackets, socks, towels, shoe rack, dining place, sleeping place, place for books, magazines etc.  Grooming;- tucking in shirts, tying shoe laces, combing the hair, brushing of teeth etc.

How are we trying to teach order in the school?  We have the timetable and we always insist on punctuality.  We have lockers for the boys to put their bags in class.  We insist desks to be in line in class.  Boys always line up going in and out of class.  We keep the classroom locked especially when going for break or lunch.

How are we trying to teach order in the school?  Asking them to clear their desks when they are going for break.  Insisting they tuck in, tie shoe laces.  We allow boys to change for sports in school as opposed to coming in sports kit in the morning as many schools do.  Maintenance of materials things-the school takes this very seriously making the necessary repairs. The teachers also give talks to the boys on how to take care of school properties.

How do you teach you 7/8 year old boy order?  Word;- What is repeatedly told to them by people in authority.  Example;- What they witness in the lives of parents and others they respect. Good example has been,and always will be,necessary for a good education. It is impossible to educate well without good example. The best example is for our children to see that we are making effort to improve.  What they repeatedly do or are led to do,in the course of every life both at home and in school.  Motivation;- rewards(incentives) and punishments (consequences) should correspond to what we want to reward or punish.

Action plan.  Earlier we stated that children do not usually perform good actions by chance; they need to be taught, motivated and helped to do them so that later they will do them on their own.  An Action plan is a collection of actions that are directed towards achieving a particular goal. Its a tool you can use to help your son acquire habits and virtues.  A good action plan should have;- Background, Objectives and progress report.  Example;- We have 3 children (background) two boys, Tom and Teddy,aged 8 and 6 and July who is 4.We have been taking role as the first educators since we learnt this in their school a year ago. We want to make a plan for the two boys; tidiness for Teddy and responsibility for Tom.

OBJECTIVES.  General; Teddy ;to be tidy. Tom ; to learn to take responsibility.  Specific; Teddy to keep his clothes and toys tidy. July to help the family to keep to its routine. Tom; to be responsible.  Means;- Tom has to take his dirty clothes to the linen basket when he has his daily bath and put his clean clothes and his toys away. He can play with only one toy at a time. He has to put it back before taking another.  July is fascinated with the watch her grandparents gave her for her birthday. She will be in charge of reminding us to follow the routine.

MOTIVATION  A big sheet of paper with two ladders, each with seven steps on the back of their bedroom door. We cut out two paper dolls. One for each one of them. We pinned them on the ladder, and each day they did their jobs, they went up a step. When they get to the top we’ll all be happy and we’ll make a special pudding to celebrate.  Report:- Monday : both did well.The younger one forgot to carry his clothes to the linen basket after his bath, but he did it as soon as I reminded him. July spent the day looking at the watch. She made sure that everything was on the dot.(the watch was a motivation)

MOTIVATION  Tuesday:-The toys were all right and the routine only fair, but it was my fault. Both boys went up a second step.  Wednesday:- Both of them went one more step.  Thursday:-The young one left his toys all over the place and as we couldn’t let him go up a step, he refused to go to bed until he had tidied up and seen his doll up a step.  Friday:- Neither went up a step, but as it was the two of them, neither minded.  Saturday and Sunday:- We had to change our routine, but everything went well.

OUT COME  Better than expected. From now on it will be more difficult, especially for Tom –he is not very persevering.  Home work : Invent an Action plan of your own with the same components to apply to your son or any other child.

REFERENCE  Training the will (part 1) By Fernando corominas.  Educating your child for life. By Pamela Wanda.