Unit 2: Relationships Infatuation or Mature Love Chapter 18 Page 494

Do Now Write down each statement and decide if you agree or disagree / or finish the statement. 1.“Love at first sight” can really happen. 2.Physical intimacy makes a relationship last. 3.Teenagers don’t really know how to be in a mature, loving relationship. 4.The most important qualities necessary in a healthy relationship are ______________. 5.A person in a relationship with a chemically dependent person should ____________. 6.In order to love someone else, you must love yourself first. 7.There are more advantages than disadvantages to sexual abstinence in a relationship. 8.There is no such thing as healthy conflict in a relationship. 9.Marriage means ______________.

Key Terms Love – affection, attachment, devotion. Infatuation – the state of being completely carried away by unreasoning passion or attraction: addictive love. Mature Love – a strong affection for, and an enduring, deep attachment to, a person whose character the partner knows well. Intimacy – being very close and familiar as in relationships involving private and personal sharing.

What is Love?

Infatuation vs. Mature Love Usually occurs at the beginning of a relationship Sexual attraction is central Characterized by urgency, intensity, sexual desire, and anxiety Driven by excitement of being involved with a person whose character is not fully known Extreme absorption in another Insecurity, distrust, lack of confidence, feeling of being threatened Nagging doubts and unanswered questions; partner remains unexamined so as not to spoil the dream Develops gradually through learning about the person Sexual attraction is present, but warm affection and friendship are central Characterized by calmness, peacefulness, empathy, support, and tolerance of partner Driven by deep attachment; based on extensive knowledge of both positive and negative qualities Wanting to be together without obsession Security, trust, confidence, unthreatened feeling Thorough knowledge of partner: mature acceptance of imperfections

Infatuation vs. Mature Love Based on fantasy Consuming, often exhausting Low self-esteem (looking for self-worth) Each needs the other to feel complete Discomfort with individual differences Each often tears down or criticizes the other Partners need to rush things, like sex or marriage; sense of urgency so as not to lose the partner One is threatened by the other’s individual growth Relationship not enduring, because it lacks firm foundation Based on reality Energizing in a healthy way High self-esteem (each person has a sense of self-worth Relationship enhances the self, but person can feel complete without the relationship Individuality accepted Each brings out the best in their partner; relationship is nurturing Partners are patient and feel no need to rush the events of relationship; sense of security; no fear of losing the partner Each encourages other’s growth Relationship is enduring, sustaining-based on strong foundation of friendship

Mature Love Mature love involves a decision to be devoted to a person. It also requires psychological intimacy. Psychological intimacy is probably the most important part of a love relationship. This type of intimacy builds slowly as two people become familiar with, and close to each other.

Infatuation vs. Mature Love

Closure What are three examples of infatuation? What are three examples of mature love?