Created by Jennifer Birckmayer Presented by Julie Ann Chamberlain

 Raise your hand if you think parenting is the most challenging job one could ever have!  Raise your hand if you are always looking for new and more effective ways to gain cooperation.  Raise your hand if you are hoping to walk away from here with some implementable ideas to make your life more peaceful…

 Effective discipline helps children learn to control their behavior so that they act according to their ideas of what is right and wrong, not because they fear punishment. For example, they are honest because they think it is wrong to be dishonest, not because they are afraid of getting caught.  Effective discipline guides The purpose of punishment is to stop a child from doing what you don't want - and using a painful or unpleasant method to stop him. There are basically four kinds of punishment physical punishment - slapping, spanking, switching, paddling, and using a belt or hair brush. verbal punishment - shaming, ridiculing, using cruel words, saying "I don't love you." withholding rewards - "You can't watch TV if you don't do your homework." penalties - "You broke the window so you will have to pay for it with money from your allowance." The first two kinds of punishment, physical and verbal, are not considered to be effective discipline methods. The other two, withholding rewards and giving penalties, can be used either as effective discipline methods or as punishment - depending on how parents administer them.

A disciplinarian is a: leader, or a teacher, of the attitudes and behaviors he/she hopes a follower (the child)) will acquire as his/her own person who helps the child learn boundaries while still feeling that he/she is a good person person who separates the deed from the doer Someone who is a good disciplinarian seems to be a person who: kids find interesting & full of good ideas is loving and helpful makes developmentally appropriate rules & expectations that kids can understand and follow Models good behavior in words and actions

Discipline is a continuum and we are trying to reach the middle

Permissive~ Very few, if any, rules. Children unclear of expectations and may see how far they can push limits. This can border on neglect (1). Authoritarian~ “Do as I say or I will punish you or withhold privileges.” Children may act out when strict adult is not around. At the extreme (10) may be abusive. Authoritative~ High and clear expectations but nurturing, warmth and have fun together.

 Complete the questionnaire on how do you react to your children’s behavior?  Shuffle papers and redistribute  Discuss goals  Review Seven Principles of Discipline  Exercises after each  IALAC (papers)

Tell children what they can do instead of what they can’t Protect and Preserve children’s feelings that they are lovable and capable Offer choices Change environment vs behavior Work with children instead of against Give safe limits they can understand Set a good example, speak and act only in ways you want your child to

 Verbal Wrap-up