Roundtable Discussion NECF Youth Workers’ Consultation 2007 Ipoh, Heritage Hotel

Adults / Parents role in Youth Ministry Bridging the Gap ISSUES STRATEGIES / PROGRAMMES ExistingGapRECOMMENDATION Connecting / relating to Youths Discipling Youths Leading Youths Empowering Youths - Sunday Service -Youth Meeting -Cell Group -Church / Youth Camp Structure: not youth friendly not youth engaging Youth behaviour differently in ‘church’ Relational: Suspicion/distrust; lack of concern about the youth Lack of appreciation of Youths Failure / undermining youth experiences Youths are suspicious of adults & therefore are not so approachable Physical: Formal / “Classroom” environment 1.Worship Order (Trans-gen elements) 2. Youth Participation in Service 3.Youth Engaging / relating issues 4.Provide infra-structure for youth 5.Inter-generational activities 6.Seminars / talks on Youth ministry (vise versa) – Parenting skills, communicating to youths 7.Educating youths on how to relate to parents/adults 8.Peer mentoring (adults): sharing of success stories 9.Exposure to other successful models of adults-youth relationship

Adults / Parents role in Youth Ministry Bridging the Gap ISSUES STRATEGIES / PROGRAMMES ExistingGapRECOMMENDATION Connecting / relating to Youths Discipling Youths Leading Youths Empowering Youths - Sunday Service -Youth Meeting -Cell Group -Church / Youth Camp Social: Compartmentalize different age groups Youths prefer to hang out with youths. They don’t naturally gravitate towards being with adults. Resource: Time – Engagement only confine to ‘Church Time’ Youth Counselors are too busy; with many other church activities Environment – geared towards ‘adult setting’ Personnel: –Unsuitable Counselors/Mentors 10.Ministry beyond church: at homes, tea tarik shop, cinema 11.Adult and Youths doing ministry together (mission trips, social ministry) – Modeling of faith & mentoring/ coaching 12.Sharing of lives: informal 13.Expose youths to Youth Culture, cries, needs & challenges 14.Church leaders: model relating to youths

Adults / Parents role in Youth Ministry Bridging the Gap ISSUES STRATEGIES / PROGRAMMES ExistingGapRECOMMENDATION Educate: Lack of understanding on how youths learn & where they learn Lack of role models (adult modeling faith) Youths: not aware or sensitive of how to relate to adults

ISSUES STRATEGIES / PROGRAMMES EXISTINGGAPRECOMMENDATION Discipling Youths 1.Camp, school CF, training 2. Weekly bible study in church 3. Parent mentoring/yout h ministry/CF 1.Time constraint 2. Lacking of cell group leaders 3. Unavailability of suitable adults/mentors 4. Lack of commitment from adults/mentors 1.Working together with church and family 2. Parents work together with church 3. Building up good parenting skills 4. Peer counseling amongst adults 5. Exposure to existing models Adults / Parents role in Youth Ministry Bridging the Gap

ISSUES STRATEGIES / PROGRAMMES Where we are: Where we want to be: RECOMMENDATION (How) Leading Youths 1.Over control: parents& adults make decisions on their own, domineering, high expection, lack of communication, weak relationship Therefore youth lack self confidence & self esteem- being overly submissive, communication breakdown 2. Over indulgent, over protective, `feeders’ to youth, materialistic, too many choices for youth, decisions – not ready, boundaries set – youth become too manipulative, lack of discipline 3. Neglected/rejected – parents not doing their duties – passing on the buck to maid/caregivers etc Youth feels: rejected, hurt, lack of trust & social skills, problematic 1. Parents/Adults to be Godly role model, good character, know how to set boundaries, when to exercise authority, take up responsibility of nurturing, mentoring, disciplining, motivating, communicating 1.Spend quality time with children, set apart time for family devotional/altar, pick up good communication skills, attend parenting seminars/workshop, read up, cut down negative influences, mentoring Adults / Parents role in Youth Ministry Bridging the Gap

ISSUES STRATEGIES / PROGRAMMES Where we are? Where we want to be: RECOMMENDATION (How) Empowe ring Youths 1.Mentality: Maturity comes with age, asian culture 2. adults are being over cautious 3. Adults/parents not releasing youths 1.Have adults to have faith/trust in the youth 2. Allowing them to learn from their mistakes 3. Supporting youths in what they do 1.Provide the environment that is safe and stable (allowing them to make mistakes) 2. Church leaders modeling relationship with youths/ good relationships 3. Change of mindset of adults & senior pastors towards youth Adults / Parents role in Youth Ministry Bridging the Gap