10 top tips for writing brilliant s

1. What’s the cris-ortunity State you crisis, then the opportunity for supporters to fix it. Simple. This should be the basic structure to most ‘campaign’ type s. WARNING: supporters will sniff out bullshit. If its not a real opportunity for change, say so.

2. Size matters Some long s work a treat – 38 degrees’ s for example – but our testing so far suggests that 150 words trumps 250 words. Use 150 words as your word limit whenever possible. Also: Vary sentence length. Avoid exceeding 20 words too much. Vary paragraph length. Rarely more than 3 sentences. Avoid words of more 10 letters, and use 1 big word max per sentence.

Break the following statement into shorter sentences (you can add or delete words if needed). Instead of committing to stronger actions, rich industrialised countries are now trying to quit the legally binding Kyoto Protocol and there’s a huge push to replace the Kyoto Protocol with a weak system for emissions reductions, based on pledges instead of commitments.

3. Be bold Try to tell the whole story of the through the words you put in bold. Dear Egbert, You’ve got Nick Clegg’s attention. Thousands of you told Nick Clegg to stand up to George Osborne's bullying. In response he’s set up a short environment survey to find out your views on climate change. If you’ve already had a reply from Mr Clegg you might have filled it in already. If not, this is your chance to tell him what the Government is getting right and wrong. Fill in Nick Clegg’s environment survey today. How do my climate expert colleagues think the Government is performing? The good: the coalition has agreed to ambitious emissions cuts in the 2020s. The bad: George Osborne’s push for dirty gas could wreck our chances of meeting the targets. Now’s your chance to let him know what you think – it only takes a couple of minutes. Fill in Nick Clegg’s environment survey today. All the best, James & the Clean British Energy team

4. Have a sense of urgency “We attribute a huge amount of our success to getting stuff into inboxes when the s matter”. Johnny, 38 degrees Not all of our s can be urgent or timely (in relation to real world events), but if they can be, make them so.

5. Keep it simple, keep it focussed 1 ask per . Get to it quick. Repeat it. Even at their most epic, a 38 degrees’ s will be very simple and very focussed.

6. Its all about them Talk about what they have done, and what they can do. Our team in Wales has just secured a welsh bee action plan. Help us get David Cameron to copy  Supporters like you have just secured a welsh bee action plan. Now’s your chance to make David Cameron copy

7. One idea per paragraph “Their latest plans to continue subsidising the burning of biofuels in power stations ignore links to deforestation, extinction and land-grabbing - and would involve funding cuts for wind power.”  Solutions? - Split the paragraph, or lose an idea.

8. Subject lines matter Different subject lines can cause 2%+ variations in click rates. That could mean 3000 people. -Short is probably better. -Simple is probably better -Active & easy is probably better e.g. “2-minutes to help bees?” -TESTING is best

9. Don’t treat people like experts Not everyone is an expert or a committed activist. And everyone dips in and out of s. So avoid acronyms and jargon…. - You probably don’t need to explain climate change in every , but its always worth saying why we want a Bee Action Plan. - Its nice to know you’re holding the biggest and best Conference ever are we? But what the heck is Conference?

10. Look forwards and backwards All our campaigns (and some other activities) have carefully thought through narratives, so stick to them. - What have you already asked of supporters? - What have they done already? - What are you going to tell them next week?

PS…pop in a PS. Killer fact up your sleeve? A bit random? Doesn’t quite fit the rest of the story? Pop it in a PS! PS. Did you know that without bees it would cost UK farmers £1.8 billion a year to hand-pollinate their crops? And that would push up our food prices. Order your free seeds now and help save bees todayOrder your free seeds now and help save bees today

PPS ; ( Don’t, use, many, commas. They make stuff hard to read.

PPPS!!!

PPPPS. Never, ever, ever, put in an image just for the sake of it