Today’s Lesson – June 19, 2016 Life Changes for Couples “F - I” - Focus, Get, Heed, Increase”

Life Changes for Couples by James M. Reeves A Biblical 12-Step Journey for Marriage Enrichment

“F” - Focus on Faith

We were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character. Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.  We have to be entirely ready to let God remove our shortcomings  Ask yourself - what will life be without them?  How would things be different if God removed your defects?  “Without faith it is impossible to please Him” Hebrews 11:6

Faith is not a feeling - Faith is an action  “By faith Abraham... “  “By faith Noah... “  Principle: You cannot have faith apart from the Word of God. God must speak first before you can take Him as His word.  Premise - Promise Intersection Table Talk

Decision Point Unbelief Faith Promise Premise Obedience Disobedience

For Me to Act in Faith - I must do:  Know the Promise  Know the Premise  Practice the Premise  Wait on the Promise “Be diligent to present yourself approved to God as a workman who does not need to be ashamed, accurately handling the word of truth.” II Timothy 2:15

“G” - Go Get Right

We made a list of all persons we harmed and became willing to make amends to them all. We made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except where to do so would injure them or others.  We are moving from cleaning the mess in our house to the dirt we helped create in other people’s houses  Two Parts: Admit our Role - Own it; Offer to Make it Right  Notice - We do not control their response “If possible, so far as it depends upon you, be at peace with all men.” Romans 12:18

What Happens When We Admit Responsibility and Make Amends? Table Talk “And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors.” Mathew 6:12

Why Should I Forgive? Grace Reason Guilt Reason Grief Reason

“H” - Heed the Weeds

“We continued to take personal inventory and, when we were wrong, promptly admitted it.”  2nd Law of Thermal Dynamics - Order to Disorder  Be on the lookout for destructive actions and attitudes  Employ the H.O.M.E. Inventory  Reach for A-B-C-D tool kit  Admit Powerlessness; Believe the Truth, Confess Christ, Discover Responsibility

PAUSE REFLECT RESPOND DISCOVERY: WHEN I CHANGE MY REACTIONS TO RESPONSES, IT WILL OFTEN CHANGE THE WAY OTHERS ACT TOWARD ME SERVE GOD LOVE OTHERS REMAIN FOCUSED

Learn to Practice the E.O.D.  Before Bed - Think about your day - how you treated others - particularly your spouse  What would you do differently? How can you learn about yourself, faith, God, and others?  Assets of the Day (healthy emotions - positive actions)  Liabilities of the Day (negative emotions - negative actions)  Amends needed

“I” - Increase God Contact

“We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.”  Diligent practice of A - H creates room in our lives  Void creates room for the In-filling of the Holy Spirit  Romans 12:2 reminds us to be transformed - to know God’s Will; be guided by His Will; be empowered by His Will  “Feed the Good Dog - Starving the Bad Dog”  What are these practices? (Anyone?)

Spiritual Disciplines  Fasting  Self-Denial  Prayer  Bible Reading  Bible Study

Spiritual Disciplines  Giving  Serving  Worship  Thanksgiving

Homework  Practice the H.O.M.E. Inventory  Use the E.O.D. Method  Consider Using - Pause - Reflect - Respond  Embrace New Disciplines out of Devotion for God

Prayer Time  Pray for your marriage  Pray for your spouse – no "fix them" prayers  Pray for our church - and leadership team  Pray for Teammates – arm us for spiritual warfare  Pray for yourself – realize your need to be more loving to your spouse in all cases

June 26th Life Change for Couples J