What is Bullying? Bullying = Intentionally aggressive behavior, repeated over time, that involves an imbalance of power. Purpose Power Pattern

PWCS Code of Behavior ‘Bullying’ means aggressive and unwanted behavior that is intended to harm, intimidate or humiliate the victim, involves a real or perceived power imbalance between the aggressor or aggressors and victim; and is repeated over time causes severe emotional trauma. ‘Bullying’ includes cyber bullying. ‘Bullying’ does not include ordinary teasing, horseplay, argument or peer conflict. Report to a staff member, as soon as, possible.

What it isn’t…. Hurtful Behavior Rude = Inadvertently saying or doing something that hurts someone else. Mean = Purposefully saying or doing something to hurt someone once (or maybe twice.) if kids and parents improperly classify rudeness and mean behavior as bullying—whether to simply make conversation or to bring attention to their short-term discomfort—we all run the risk of becoming so sick and tired of hearing the word that this actual life-and-death issue among young people loses its urgency as quickly as it rose to prominence. As we have heard too often in the news, a child’s life may depend on a non-jaded adult’s ability to discern between rudeness at the bus stop and life-altering bullying.

Why is it important to distinguish between hurtful behavior and bullying I have already begun to see that gratuitous references to bullying are creating a bit of a “little boy who cried wolf” phenomena. In other words, if kids and parents improperly classify rudeness and mean behavior as bullying—whether to simply make conversation or to bring attention to their short- term discomfort—we all run the risk of becoming so sick and tired of hearing the word that this actual life-and-death issue among young people loses its urgency as quickly as it rose to prominence. As we have heard too often in the news, a child’s life may depend on a non-jaded adult’s ability to discern between rudeness at the bus stop and life-altering bullying— Signe Whitson, LSW—bullying prevention expert. Ms. Whitson is a Licensed social worker, school counselor and bullying prevention expert

Emotional Intelligence Solving Personal Challenges by Understanding Both Sides Some may ask how can being emotionally intelligent solve the problem of bullying. Student’s who are able to master their own emotions and understand the emotional states are able to quickly and effectively resolve issues with others (that rude or mean statements/actions). They bounce back from slights or misunderstandings with ease. And they are less likely to be become targets of bullying or become a student who bullies. So how do school counselors help your student become emotionally intelligent? Thru classroom, small group and individual school counseling supports that target social emotional growth and learning.

RULER Center for Emotional Intelligence—Yale University R Recognize emotions in yourself and others U Understand the causes and consequence of emotions L Label emotions accurately E Express emotions appropriately R Regulate emotions effectively R=Empathy (concepts introduced in primary grades, definition (EMPATHY), models, and practice 3-5th 100% of our 4-5 graders understand this concept and 82% can give personal example of a time when they demonstrated empathy U= Everyone in the building is engaged in helping students understand cause and consequence L= Guidance curriculum teaches the language(verbal and nonverbal) of emotions. Gives students confidence to have shared vocabulary, reduces the stress of feeling strong emotions if you know the name and the reason for the emotion. No emotions are bad, emotions tell us that we may need to take actions. E= Emotions are not bad, we teach respectful and effective actions R=Guidance, small groups and individual counseling we teach coping strategies that student can use when feeling strong emotions

Understanding Self Name a feeling and match body/mind response Understanding the environment that caused the feeling How did I express the feeling How did I control/regulate the feeling Reflect and Plan for next time Usually done in small groups or when a student requests our help thru the use of a self-referral form or teacher referral. Parents can referral students as well.

Understanding Others How were they feeling, think of possibilities What caused their feelings How did they express their feelings How did they regulate their feelings Reflect and Plan—What could I have done to handle the situation better. What can I do now. An evidence/research based Guidance Curriculum taught by master level school counseling professionals

Communication Skills Body Language Respectful tone Sensing another’s emotions “I” Statements Starts in kindergarten and continues through out the elementary school years, mostly delivered to students thru the use of classroom lessons