The Developing Child Chapter 3 Building Strong Families 3-1: Family Characteristics 3-2: Parenting Skills

Qualities of Strong Families All members feel accepted and safe Adults and children can learn and grow together Provide children with a sense of belonging, emotional support, nurturing, protection, and security Give children first lessons in values and acceptable social behavior Work together to provide for the needs of the family and prepare the children to live in society Listen to each other with an open mind and allow each person to express opinions and share feelings Share goals and values Show appreciation for one another

Families Two Main Functions: Pass on Values Members help meet one another’s basic needs Families prepare children to live in society Pass on Values Through example Through communication Through religious training

Families Meet Basic Needs Physical Provide food, clothing, and shelter Keep children safe and healthy Care for children when they are sick Teach safety rules Emotional Give and receive love, care, and help Social Teach how to share, take turns, and work to achieve family goals Intellectual Teach language and concepts Support and get involved in learning to promote success in school

Types of Family Structures Nuclear Family Mother, father, and child(ren) Single-Parent Family One parent and child(ren) Blended Family Single parent marries another person who may or may not have children Extended Family A parent or parents, at least one child and other relatives who live with them

Joining A Family Legal Guardian Adoption Foster Child A person may be designated to assume responsibility for raising a child if the parents are unable to Adoption Children may legally and permanently become part of families that they are not born into Foster Child Joining a family temporarily until parents solve problems or a permanent adoptive family can be found

The Family Life Cycle Couple Stage Expanding Stage Developing Stage Couple works to establish a home and their marriage relationship Expanding Stage The couple prepares for and adjusts to parenthood Developing Stage As children grow, parents work to meet their changing needs and help them develop independence

The Family Life Cycle Launching Stage Middle Stage Retirement Stage Children leave home. Parents help them adapt. Middle Stage Empty nest stage. Children have left home. The couple renews their relationship and prepares for retirement Retirement Stage The couple stops full-time work and adjusts to more free time

Trends Affecting Families Mobility Many adults move from the community where they were raised Many families lack close, supportive connections with extended family Aging Population More people find themselves caring for aging parents

Trends Affecting Families Economic Changes Many families struggle to make ends meet Necessary for two parents to work full time Families are smaller than they used to be Couples delay having children Increased need for childcare Workplace Changes Continuing need to learn new skills, adults may return to school in some capacity More unemployment

Trends Affecting Families Technology Increases efficiency in home and work Devices isolate people from one another Using it safely and within reasonable limits Monitor children to make sure enough time is spent on physical development and social skills Use it to strengthen family bonds Make choices based on family’s values

Sources of Support for Families Under Stress Talking to friends, relatives, or co-workers Consulting family doctor, counselor, social worker, or religious advisor Talking to caregivers, teachers, religious leaders, or school counselors Joining a support group Seeking help from local family service agencies

Spending Time Together Helps Build Strong Families Activities together can become family traditions Families that have many traditions tend to form strong ties with each other

Families Share Values Honesty Respect Responsibility Hard Work Faith

Handling Conflict Stay Calm Be an active listener Use positive body language

Children’s Needs Physical: Emotional & Social: Intellectual Needs: Food, clothing, shelter, health care, and safety Emotional & Social: Children feel safe, loved, and cared for Allows children to learn how to make friends and work with other people Parents must show restraint and not be overprotective Intellectual Needs: Mental stimulation and opportunities to learn Helps prepare children for life as independent adults Senses, Reading, and Exploring

Deprivation Lack of the critical needs and encouraging environment that are essential for physical, emotional, and intellectual well-being Not the same as poverty Children can be deprived of time, nutrients, stimulation, or love Are the child’s basic needs being met?

Parenting Styles Authoritarian: Assertive-Democratic: Permissive: Children should obey their parents without question Responds quickly and firmly when rules are broken Assertive-Democratic: Children given a certain amount of independence and freedom of choice within the rules Children learn best from accepting the results of their actions or by problem-solving with parent to find acceptable solution Permissive: Children have a wide range of freedom Children may set their own rules Rule-breaking is typically ignored

Guidance Using firmness and understanding to help children learn how to behave Learn self-discipline (ability to control their own behavior) How to get along with others and handle feelings in an acceptable way Develop a sense of security and self-esteem Learn right from wrong and develop a conscience (inner sense of what’s right)

Encouraging Appropriate Behavior Be a good role model Give effective direction Use specific words the child can understand Begin with an action verb Set limits Helps child understand expectations and acceptable behavior and develop self-control Provide positive reinforcement Be specific Recognize small steps Help children take pride in their actions

Setting Limits When setting limits, parents should consider the following: Does the limit allow the child to learn, explore, and grow? Is the limit fair and appropriate for the child’s age? Does the limit benefit the child, or is it merely for the adult’s convenience?

Responding to Misbehavior Consider the following: Is the expected behavior appropriate, given the child’s age and development? Does the child understand that the behavior was wrong? Did the child do the behavior knowingly and deliberately, or was it beyond the child’s control? When punishing a child, parents and caregivers should show that they disapprove of the behavior but that they still love the child Avoid blame and criticism

Negative Reinforcement Natural Consequences Children suffer from the actual result of their action Logical Consequences Consequences have a connection to the misbehavior Loss of Privileges Taking away a privilege, most effective with 5+ Time-Out Give child a chance to calm down and regain self-control

Poor Disciplinary Methods Bribing Fail to learn self-control Making children promise to behave Children will naturally make mistakes Shouting or yelling Shaming or belittling Can make a child feel worthless Threatening to withhold love Create a fear of being rejected or abandoned Exaggerating consequences Frighten children and parent loses credibility

Consistency in Guidance Helps children know what is expected of them Without consistency, children may stop paying attention to rules Children lose trust and confidence in caregivers who constantly change the rules or fail to enforce rules in a consistent way

Chapter 3 Content Vocabulary nuclear family single-parent family custodial parent blended family extended family legal guardian foster child intergenerational deprivation parenting style guidance self-discipline conscience positive reinforcement negative reinforcement time-out