Habit # 3 Put First Things First

KEY PARADIGMS Effectiveness requires balancing important roles, relationships and activities. Effectiveness requires balancing important roles, relationships and activities. “Things that matter most should never be at the mercy of things which matter least” “Things that matter most should never be at the mercy of things which matter least”

Today you will learn to: Clarify your goals and achieve them Clarify your goals and achieve them Handle people and projects that waste your time Handle people and projects that waste your time Work more efficiently with your peers Work more efficiently with your peers Learn specific skills and tools to save you time Learn specific skills and tools to save you time Overcome stress and procrastination Overcome stress and procrastination Have a better insight on how to effectively manage your time in different scenarios Have a better insight on how to effectively manage your time in different scenarios

First Things First First things are those things that you, personally, find most worth doing. They move you in the right direction. They help you achieve the principle- centered purpose expressed in your mission statement. First things are those things that you, personally, find most worth doing. They move you in the right direction. They help you achieve the principle- centered purpose expressed in your mission statement. The key is not to prioritize your schedule but to schedule your priorities. – Covey The key is not to prioritize your schedule but to schedule your priorities. – Covey

Time Quadrant… Which one are you? Not Important Important UrgentNot Urgent I II III IV The Procrastinator Exam Tomorrow Friend Gets Injured Late For Work Project Due Today Car Breaks Down The Yes-Man Unimportant Phone Calls Interruptions Other People’s Small Problems Peer Pressure The Prioritizer Planning, Goal Setting Essay Due In A Week Exercise Relationships Relaxation The Slacker Too Much TV Endless Phone Calls/Text Messaging Excessive Gaming My Space/Face Book Addiction Mall Marathons Time Wasters

Q1: The Procrastinator Urgency: An activity is urgent if you or others feel that it requires immediate attention. Urgency: An activity is urgent if you or others feel that it requires immediate attention. Leads to stress and anxiety Leads to stress and anxiety Feeling burnt out Feeling burnt out Mediocre performance Mediocre performance Polly the Procrastinator’s motto “I am going to stop procrastinating… sometime soon”. Don’t expect her to study for a test until the night before…or expect her to get gas. She’s too busy driving.

Q3: The Yes-Man (Where’s Q2?…save the best for last) People Pleaser People Pleaser These things are important to other people than yourself These things are important to other people than yourself “He who tries to please everyone pleases no one” “He who tries to please everyone pleases no one” Lack of personal discipline Lack of personal discipline End up feeling like a “doormat” for others to wipe their feet on End up feeling like a “doormat” for others to wipe their feet on Yanni the Yes-Man’s motto is “Tomorrow, I am going to be more assertive – if that’s OK with you”. He really didn’t want to join the swimming team – he liked art. But his dad was a swimmer, and, of course, he didn’t want to let him down.

Something to Ponder… (This one’s for the Yes Man) “I don’t know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everyone”-Bill Cosby

Q4: The Slacker Lack of responsibility Lack of responsibility Less chance of success Less chance of success Higher anxiety/stress level Higher anxiety/stress level Higher chance of depression Higher chance of depression Tends to be flaky Tends to be flaky Slacker’s credo: “Why try harder when this is good enough?” Professional loafer; sleeping until noon takes real skill, after all. School is the last thing on their mind. They are young and healthy, so why work? Doing nothing rocks!

Q2: The Prioritizer Control in your life Control in your life Accountable for actions Accountable for actions Less stress and anxiety Less stress and anxiety More effective in school, life and in relationships More effective in school, life and in relationships High performance High performance More Balanced More Balanced Polly the Prioritizer is by no means perfect, but she can balance her responsibilities with the things she enjoys and has a fulfilling, balanced life. She is not as stressed because she has nothing and no one looming over her.

Planning: Why is it important? You can control your life better. You can control your life better. You can manage the things you HAVE to do and make more time for the things you WANT to do. You can manage the things you HAVE to do and make more time for the things you WANT to do. You will have less stress and anxiety in your life. You will have less stress and anxiety in your life. You will have better relationships. You will have better relationships. You will have a better chance of success. You will have a better chance of success. Now let’s go over HOW to plan…

3 Steps to Planning Step 1: Identify Your “Rocks” Ask yourself “What are the most important things I need to do this week?” Ask yourself “What are the most important things I need to do this week?” Think about what role you play…student, friend, family member, worker, individual and whatever else you do. Think about what role you play…student, friend, family member, worker, individual and whatever else you do. Then come up with two important things you want to get done in each role. Then come up with two important things you want to get done in each role.

3 Steps to Planning Step 2: Block Out Time For Your “Big Rocks” Use a planner to block out time frames where you plan to complete the tasks you have set Use a planner to block out time frames where you plan to complete the tasks you have set Keeping a list and having it handy helps you from forgetting Keeping a list and having it handy helps you from forgetting Checking things off of your list gives a sense of accomplishment Checking things off of your list gives a sense of accomplishment

3 Steps to Planning Step 3: Schedule Everything Else Once you have your big rocks “booked”, schedule in all of your other little to-dos, daily tasks and appointments Once you have your big rocks “booked”, schedule in all of your other little to-dos, daily tasks and appointments

Group Activity Your group will be given a scenario Your group will be given a scenario Your group must write a script on how you would handle the situation Your group must write a script on how you would handle the situation Choose a leader to keep your group on task Choose a leader to keep your group on task Choose recorders to write out the script (each actor must have their own copy of the full script) Choose recorders to write out the script (each actor must have their own copy of the full script) Choose two “actors” that will play out the sketch in front of the class Choose two “actors” that will play out the sketch in front of the class You will have 30 minutes to read your scenario and write your script You will have 30 minutes to read your scenario and write your script

Be sure to ask each other these questions when writing your scripts: Is your reaction “proactive” or “reactive”? Is your reaction “proactive” or “reactive”? Are you thinking with the “end in mind”; what are the consequences of your actions? Are you thinking with the “end in mind”; what are the consequences of your actions? Are you putting first things first? What are your priorities in your scenario? Are you putting first things first? What are your priorities in your scenario? What is your desired outcome? What is your desired outcome? What steps will you take to ensure you get the desired outcome? What steps will you take to ensure you get the desired outcome?

“Ollie the Overloaded” You do it all. You play three sports; you belong to four clubs and hold officer positions in all of them; you volunteer at the local animal shelter, nursing home, and hospital; and you maintain straight A's. An opportunity has come up where you can pursue your favorite hobby ( with your best friend, but you will have to resign from your class president position with the SGA. You have to explain this situation to your class advisor, who threw a party for you when you were voted into your position. What will be your decision and how will your conversation play out? You do it all. You play three sports; you belong to four clubs and hold officer positions in all of them; you volunteer at the local animal shelter, nursing home, and hospital; and you maintain straight A's. An opportunity has come up where you can pursue your favorite hobby ( with your best friend, but you will have to resign from your class president position with the SGA. You have to explain this situation to your class advisor, who threw a party for you when you were voted into your position. What will be your decision and how will your conversation play out?

“East Coast Evelyn” Your parents are pushing you to get into the college that they attended on the West coast, but that’s not where you want to live. You want to stay in Florida and use your Bright Futures Scholarship, and you are depending on your parents to foot the rest of the bill, or else you will have to take out student loans. It is coming down to the wire, and you have to send out applications this week. Your mom/dad wants to sit down with you to make arrangements for the school out west. What will be your decision and how will your conversation play out? Your parents are pushing you to get into the college that they attended on the West coast, but that’s not where you want to live. You want to stay in Florida and use your Bright Futures Scholarship, and you are depending on your parents to foot the rest of the bill, or else you will have to take out student loans. It is coming down to the wire, and you have to send out applications this week. Your mom/dad wants to sit down with you to make arrangements for the school out west. What will be your decision and how will your conversation play out?

“Wally the Work-a-holic” You work part-time and you love your job. Your grades have been slipping since you started and now you are failing Math. Your manager said that if you picked up some extra hours, that you would be a shoe in for a promotion and raise, so you agree. You do not have the time after school to get extra help. If you do not pass this class, you may not advance to the next grade, and you will not graduate on time. You must now have a conversation with either your teacher or your manager explaining what you plan to do. What will be your decision and how will your conversation play out? You work part-time and you love your job. Your grades have been slipping since you started and now you are failing Math. Your manager said that if you picked up some extra hours, that you would be a shoe in for a promotion and raise, so you agree. You do not have the time after school to get extra help. If you do not pass this class, you may not advance to the next grade, and you will not graduate on time. You must now have a conversation with either your teacher or your manager explaining what you plan to do. What will be your decision and how will your conversation play out?

“Bad Rap Rachel” You have just moved to a new school your senior year. You had problems at your other school, and you have the opportunity to start with a clean slate. The first week, you meet a group of your peers that you really get along with. A few days later, you find out that two of your new “friends” are selling drugs on campus. You saw this move as an opportunity to leave your bad reputation behind, but you haven’t really hit it off with anyone else. In the next few weeks you meet another group of kids; they are involved in school clubs and really nice, but you think they are a little “dorky”. Both groups are having a party on the same day and you are invited. You must choose one and tell a member from the other group why you will not be attending their party. What will be your decision and how will your conversation play out? You have just moved to a new school your senior year. You had problems at your other school, and you have the opportunity to start with a clean slate. The first week, you meet a group of your peers that you really get along with. A few days later, you find out that two of your new “friends” are selling drugs on campus. You saw this move as an opportunity to leave your bad reputation behind, but you haven’t really hit it off with anyone else. In the next few weeks you meet another group of kids; they are involved in school clubs and really nice, but you think they are a little “dorky”. Both groups are having a party on the same day and you are invited. You must choose one and tell a member from the other group why you will not be attending their party. What will be your decision and how will your conversation play out?

“Torn Torrance” It’s Saturday afternoon and your friend Sally’s boyfriend just gave her the boot and needs some consoling. You have a huge group project due on Monday and you still have not set up a time to meet with your group. Sally is a friend that usually requires a lot of your time, but she has been there for you in the past. You know that if you spend time with her this weekend, you will not be able to complete the project to the best of your ability, and you will be able to just get by with a C. You either have to meet with your group OR spend the remainder weekend with Sally. What will be your decision and how will your conversation play out with your team members or Sally? It’s Saturday afternoon and your friend Sally’s boyfriend just gave her the boot and needs some consoling. You have a huge group project due on Monday and you still have not set up a time to meet with your group. Sally is a friend that usually requires a lot of your time, but she has been there for you in the past. You know that if you spend time with her this weekend, you will not be able to complete the project to the best of your ability, and you will be able to just get by with a C. You either have to meet with your group OR spend the remainder weekend with Sally. What will be your decision and how will your conversation play out with your team members or Sally?

Review What were the steps you took to reach your outcome? What were the steps you took to reach your outcome? What different things did you consider when making your decisions? What different things did you consider when making your decisions? Would you choose the same outcome if this situation really happened to you? Why or why not? Would you choose the same outcome if this situation really happened to you? Why or why not? Which group had the best outcome? Explain your reasoning. Which group had the best outcome? Explain your reasoning.