1 Samuel 18:1-4 Now when he had finished speaking to Saul, the soul of Jonathan was knit to the soul of David, and Jonathan loved him as his own soul. Saul took him that day, and would not let him go home to his father’s house anymore. Then Jonathan and David made a covenant, because he loved him as his own soul. And Jonathan took off the robe that was on him and gave it to David, with his armor, even to his sword and his bow and his belt.

You Ain’t Never Had a Friend Like Me Sometimes the Lord brings people into your life with whom things just “click” and you “bond” 1 Sam. 18:1-4; cf. Dt. 13:6; 1 Sam. 20:17

You Ain’t Never Had a Friend Like Me Genuine friendship reflects genuine, spiritual love 1 Sam. 18:3; cf. 1 Cor. 13:4-7

1 Samuel 18:1-4 Now when he had finished speaking to Saul, the soul of Jonathan was knit to the soul of David, and Jonathan loved him as his own soul. Saul took him that day, and would not let him go home to his father’s house anymore. Then Jonathan and David made a covenant, because he loved him as his own soul. And Jonathan took off the robe that was on him and gave it to David, with his armor, even to his sword and his bow and his belt.

You Ain’t Never Had a Friend Like Me Genuine friendship is not self-centered, but unselfish 1 Sam. 18:4; 20:4; Phil. 2:3-11 Our interest should be their best interest!

1 Samuel 19:2-4a So Jonathan told David, saying, “My father Saul seeks to kill you. Therefore please be on your guard until morning, and stay in a secret place and hide. And I will go out and stand beside my father in the field where you are, and I will speak with my father about you. Then what I observe, I will tell you.” Thus Jonathan spoke well of David to Saul his father, and said to him, “Let not the king sin against his servant, against David, because he has not sinned against you,

1 Samuel 19:4b-6 and because his works have been very good toward you. For he took his life in his hands and killed the Philistine, and the L ORD brought about a great deliverance for all Israel. You saw it and rejoiced. Why then will you sin against innocent blood, to kill David without a cause?” So Saul heeded the voice of Jonathan, and Saul swore, “As the L ORD lives, he shall not be killed.”

You Ain’t Never Had a Friend Like Me Genuine friendship is loyal 1 Sam. 19:2-6; 20:9, 32-34; 23:16-18

1 Samuel 23:16-18 Then Jonathan, Saul’s son, arose and went to David in the woods and strengthened his hand in God. And he said to him, “Do not fear, for the hand of Saul my father shall not find you. You shall be king over Israel, and I shall be next to you. Even my father Saul knows that.” So the two of them made a covenant before the L ORD. And David stayed in the woods, and Jonathan went to his own house.

You Ain’t Never Had a Friend Like Me Genuine friendship seeks to encourage 1 Sam. 23:16-18

1 Samuel 23:16-18 Therefore you shall deal kindly with your servant, for you have brought your servant into a covenant of the L ORD with you. Nevertheless, if there is iniquity in me, kill me yourself, for why should you bring me to your father?” But Jonathan said, “Far be it from you! For if I knew certainly that evil was determined by my father to come upon you, then would I not tell you?”

You Ain’t Never Had a Friend Like Me Genuine friendship emphasizes truth and honesty, with kindness 1 Sam. 20:9; 12-17; Eph. 4:15

You Ain’t Never Had a Friend Like Me Genuine friendship is grounded on commitment to our friends 1 Sam. 18:3; 20:16-17; 23:18; Pr. 17:17

You Ain’t Never Had a Friend Like Me Genuine friendship wants what God wants in the lives of each; it is spiritual and accountable to God. 1 Sam. 18:3; 20:12-17, 42; 23:16-17; 1 Cor. 13(!)

2 Samuel 1:25-26 “How the mighty have fallen in the midst of the battle! Jonathan was slain in your high places. I am distressed for you, my brother Jonathan; You have been very pleasant to me; Your love to me was wonderful, Surpassing the love of women.

You Ain’t Never Had a Friend Like Me While few things compare to the love we have in marriage, even marriage is encumbered with expectations and needs that can impair its success.

You Ain’t Never Had a Friend Like Me Friendship often does not have those issues. Thus, the love from man to man and woman to woman can be unique and special. It is in this sense that a friend’s love can be said to be better than one’s spouse. 2 Sam. 1:26

Proverbs 13:20 He who walks with wise men will be wise, But the companion of fools will be destroyed.

Wisdom in Friendships A wise person pursues wise friends. Are you a missionary or a mission field?

Proverbs 12:26 The righteous should choose his friends carefully, For the way of the wicked leads them astray.

Wisdom in Friendships Genuine friendships should involve deliberation and choice. This should extend to dating and marriage. Prov. 18:22; 31:10f.

Wisdom in Friendships When we fail to do this we can pay a high price! 1 Cor. 15:33 Do not be misled: “Bad company corrupts good character.”

Proverbs 1:8-9 Watch out for the bad guys! Listen, my son, to your father’s instruction and do not forsake your mother’s teaching. They are a garland to grace your head and a chain to adorn your neck. My son, if sinful men entice you, do not give in to them.

1.Your parents really do have your best interests in mind. Listen to them! 2.People are more attractive to others when they are wise.

Proverbs 1:9-14 Watch out for the bad guys! My son, if sinful men entice you, do not give in to them. If they say, “Come along with us; let’s lie in wait for innocent blood, let’s ambush some harmless soul; let’s swallow them alive, like the grave, and whole, like those who go down to the pit; we will get all sorts of valuable things and fill our houses with plunder; cast lots with us; we will all share the loot”—

3. When you know something is foolish, you should follow your head, not your heart. 4. The Bad Guys (BGs) are brilliant at making what is dangerous sound fun. 5. The BGs often appeal to a sense of power.

6. The BGs want to convince you that you can safely get something for nothing. 7. The BGs use a sense of friendship and community to draw others in.

Proverbs 1:15-18 Watch out for the bad guys! my son, do not go along with them, do not set foot on their paths; for their feet rush into evil, they are swift to shed blood. How useless to spread a net where every bird can see it! These men lie in wait for their own blood; they ambush only themselves!

8. Don’t go where they are. Stay away from them! 9. They’re not even smart enough to be called bird-brains! Why insult birds?

Proverbs 1:19 Watch out for the bad guys! Such are the paths of all who go after ill-gotten gain; it takes away the life of those who get it

10. Allowing others to take the “easy road” to gain is actually a road to disaster.

Proverbs 14:7 Stay away from a fool, for you will not find knowledge on their lips. (NIV)

Wisdom in Friendships Don’t make foolish people your close friends. Their influence can be disastrous. For example…

Proverbs 22:24-25 Do not make friends with a hot-tempered person, do not associate with one easily angered, or you may learn their ways and get yourself ensnared.

Wisdom in Friendships Sometimes our friends are our greatest influence… for better or for worse.

Proverbs 28:7 A discerning son heeds instruction, but a companion of gluttons disgraces his father.

Wisdom in Friendships When we spend time with people given to excess (eating, drinking, immorality) and self-gratification instead of self-control, it leads to embarrassing consequences. Prov. 13:4; Ps. 26:4

1. Be intentional – Initiate Make them a priority: Love = T-I-M-E Pursue the relationship: phone calls, texts, s, arranging convenient meeting times But, be wise! You don’t want them hating the idea of you!

2. Be spiritual – Don’t focus on yourself, but them (Blind Date?) Build your relationship around common interests and make sure Christ is first, which means you pray for them, forgive them, pursue their growth in Christ and avoid what does not fit that paradigm!

2. Be spiritual – Accept them (sort of…) We all want to be loved for who we are Always accept their failures and never accept their failures Can we ignore Biblical standards and truly love some one?

3. Be encouraging – Life is difficult and one of the main commands toward the church is to daily encourage one another. So, what might that look like?

4. Be selective – The reality is that you only have so much time for your highest priority relationships. So, choose your priority relationships and use your time wisely.

4. Be generous – …with your time and resources… …both to Christians and non-Christians, but… …know the difference in relationships… …what drains you and what builds you?