Self-Regulation and Coping Skills Breanne Heaslip and Julie Cleary EES School Counselors

What is self-regulation and Why is it important? Self-regulation is the ability to be aware of and manage difficult feelings as they occur. It is important because the development of self-regulation skills are essential in being able to persevere through difficult life challenges. These skills also support healthy brain growth and functioning.

Brain Functioning Cortex Reflective Cognition Concrete cognition The Brain works from the bottom up: Affiliation Attachment/Reward If there is a need in one of the areas in the lower brain, all of the other areas will not function properly. For example if a Limbic System child is tired they may not be able to access motor regulation, Sexual Behavior emotional regulation, and then high order thinking. Emotional Reactivity Cerebellum Motor Regulation Arousal Appetite/Satiety Brain Stem Sleep Blood Pressure Heart Rate Body Temperature www.ChildTrauma.org

Social and Emotional Milestones 5 - 6 years old: Displays a range of emotions Still relies on caregiver support to solve problems but is beginning to use learned problem solving strategies with support Tantrums are still common but should not last for an extended period of time Beginning to identify the names of feelings and feelings others may be experiencing Withdrawing or acting out to express feelings or to solve problems may still occur 7-8 years old: Ability to recognize how their body reacts to difficult feelings Ability to name more complicated feelings such as disappointed, anxious, frustrated etc. Tantrums should not occur on a regular basis Can identify that their behaviors and feelings affect how others think and feel about them Children can identify several solutions to solve a problem Children can persevere through conflicts and challenges

Developing Self-Regulation and Coping Skills at School Feelings identification and practice Stop, Name Your Feeling Calm Down Take a break, take breath, talk it out, count to 10 5 Point scale Cool Cat Problem Solving Thinking thoughts and feeling feelings Identifying body cues Mind and Body Time

Supporting Social and Emotional Learning at Home Establish a routine (bedtime, eating, play, etc) Review and role play new situations ( what will it look like, sound like) Provide brief, concrete, and consistent expectations for your child Develop appropriate consequences for repeated behavior prior to the behavior occurring ( do not address consequences when your child is escalated) When your child is escalated give your child time and space to calm down ( do not talk to them in the moment except to give them a brief reminder of the expectation) Try to remain calm and model appropriate coping skills ( breathing, walking away, etc) After de-escalation, process how they were feeling and how they can get their needs met a different way ( talk it out, take a break, take breath, physical activity). For younger kids you may have to help them identify their feeling Read children’s literature and identify feelings of characters and problem solving strategies used