Social Media for Parents of Children Online Caitlyn Tengwall BPS Parent University

Popular apps for teens Online concerns How to help Agenda Snapchat Instagram Twitter Texting apps Hiding apps Online concerns Cyberbullying Self-Esteem Sexting How to help

Benefits of Social Media Self Expression Builds political and social awareness It is another way to connect with friends and build relationships Teens are able to find people who share their interests

SnapChat What Makes it unique: Snapchat is a photo messaging app. The feature that makes Snapchat unique is that the images self destruct after 1 to 10 seconds. Components Photo messaging Chats Stories Filters, Face swapping, Stickers, Lenses, Slo-mo, Rewind Replays Best friends, and Snapstreaks Location Sharing

SnapChat layout

Snapchat is hard to track What to watch out for Snapchat is hard to track Sexting Bullying Photos may self destruct but screenshots don’t False sense of impermanence Seeking popularity

Instagram What Makes it unique: Instagram is Photo sharing app. What teens (among many others) like is the filters and editing software. Components Photo sharing Photo filters, boarders, edit tools Tagging Follow friends Follow celebrities etc. Instagram Direct Photo mapping

Instagram Layout

Contact with strangers Inappropriate images What to watch out for Location sharing Contact with strangers Inappropriate images

Twitter What Makes it unique: Twitter is a platform for Microblogs called tweets that are 140 characters or less. Components Follow friends and celebrities Sharing articles, images, links to websites, etc. Use of #hashtags Retweeting Mentions @ Direct messaging Live tweeting Location tracking

Twitter Layout

What to watch out for Bullying Access to porn

Texting and Texting Apps Messenger (facebook) Vine What’s app KiK Yik Yak Ask.fm

Texting too much /compulsively Bullying Self esteem What to watch out for Texting too much /compulsively Bullying Self esteem Harms social connection Not sleeping Texting while driving Sexting *Messages can be deleted

Hiding Apps These are apps that teens can use to hide pictures, videos, messages, even apps. Most are named to look like something innocuous. Audio Manager Calculator% Vaulty

Cyber Bullying Who Experiences it: What makes Cyberbullying dangerous: 43% children will experience cyber bullying. Girls are about twice as likely as boys to be victims and perpetrators of cyber bullying Only 1 in 10 victims will inform a parent or trusted adult What makes Cyberbullying dangerous: There is both a huge audience and the victim is often isolated Cyber bullying is often anonymous and hard to track How to Help? Use privacy settings Connect only with friends be; able to identify friends’ handles Keep open communication

Self-Esteem Issues Who Experiences it: Many students, boys and girls, struggle with self esteem and the public platform of social media amplifies negative voices. Among high school students, 44% of girls and 15% of guys are attempting to lose weight About 20% of teens will experience depression 7 in 10 girls believe that they are not good enough or don’t measure up in some way, including their looks, performance in school and relationships with friends and family members.

Snap Chat Instagram

What makes social media dangerous to self-esteem Social media quantifies popularity by the number of friends and followers you have and the number of likes a post receives Teens will compare themselves with others. Teens feel a pressure to look good and appear in certain way. Teens will spend time curating the images they post, often obsessing over the way they look in photos and what they say. These curated images also create a false standard that teens try to meet and maintain. Teens often see photos of events that they aren’t invited to and can feel excluded. Aka FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out) How to Help? Set limits on when your teen is using their phone Encourage teens to interact with friends face to face Compliment your teens Keep open communication

Sexting Sexting is the act of sending sexually explicit messages or photos over a cell phone or the Internet Who Experiences it: 9% of teens with a cell phone have sent a sext 11% of teen girls ages 13 to 16 have been involved with sending or receiving sexually explicit messages 17% of sexters share the messages they receive with others 71% of teen girls and 67% of teen guys who have sent or posted sexually suggestive content say they have sent/posted this content to a boyfriend/girlfriend. 21% of teen girls and 39% of teen boys say they have sent such content to someone they wanted to date or hook up with. 15% of teens who have sent or posted nude/seminude images of themselves say they have done so to someone they only knew online.

Keep open communication Monitor computers and devices your teen uses What makes sexting dangerous: Once an image, message or video has been shared, the sender has lost all control of where or how it will be distributed Peer pressure plays a big part in why teens sext. This is often not something that both parties are fully comfortable with. It is illegal To ask for sext -It is illegal for anyone, with lascivious intent, to knowingly encourage, cause, coerce, solicit, or entice a person under 18 years of age to pose or be shown in a state of nudity to photograph them. To send a sext -It is illegal for anyone, to knowingly send out pictures of a person under 18 in a state of nudity or engaged in a sexual act. To have a sext- It is illegal for anyone to possess photographs that depict a person under the age of 18 posed with “a lewd exhibition of genitals, buttocks, breasts or engaged in an actual or simulated sexual acts.” How to Help? Keep open communication Monitor computers and devices your teen uses

TMI- Too Much Information What do teens share? 92% Use their real name on their pages 90% Use photo of themselves 82% Use their birthdays 70% School 53% Post their email addresses 20% Post their cell phone number Where they are currently by “Checking in” What makes sharing information online dangerous: There is a big audience Not all “friends” are friends How to Help? Keep open communication Monitor privacy settings

Stranger Danger Who Experiences it: 70% of teens online have received a message from someone they don’t know 30% teens have responded to messages from people they don’t know 8% will meet someone they have only met online. What makes Strangers online dangerous: It is very easy to be deceptive online These messages are often sexually explicit How to Help? Only be “friends” with people you know IRL (In Real Life) Report messages with inappropriate content Change settings to be private

Talk is more important than Tools Monitoring software usually keeps out too much or too little and is fairly easy to workaround, this is especially true of phones The conversations you have with your teens about the technology use are more impactful than monitoring software in curbing and knowing what teens are doing online Monitoring your child’s phone in front of them, explaining what concerns you have and where you see dangers shows teens what they need to be on the look out for This is SOCIAL media it is an aspect of teen’s social lives so talk about it!

Need to Know Know what information you teen includes about themselves on their profile Know what apps and websites your teen uses Know what they post and how often they are posting Know who their friends/followers are and how they know them Know your child’s password and profile names

Favorite Tips Download apps together and know what the app is for Use a password that your child doesn’t know for apple id and the google play stores Phones and laptops need bedtimes. Have teens leave cell phones and devices outside of their bedrooms at night Notice how much time your child spends on their phone, if there is an uptick something maybe going on Keep profiles private This is one aspect of a teen’s social life remind your teen or that and yourself

Message me: ctengwall@ Questions? Message me: ctengwall@ bostonpublicschools.org