Effective Communication Styles UWS Mini - Aspire Program September 2008 INSPIRING TRANSFORMATIONAL LEADERSHIP

What is Communication? Communication is a process by which we: Give Receive or Exchange Information with others. It can involve: Speaking Listening Writing Body Language Speaker Encoding Message Decoding Listener Source: “Communicating at work”

Why Do We Communicate? To gain credibility To help others and receive help To receive or give information To form relationships To express ourselves To give feedback To complain To resolve conflict To understand and be understood

Types of Communication Written Verbal Non Verbal Newsletters Voicemail Body Language Reports Unplanned Chats Eye Contact Forms Meetings Gut Feel Emails Conversations Letters Interviews Memos Fax SMS Messages

Communicating with “D” Behaviour High D’s want others to be direct, straightforward, and open to their need for results. Try to: Make communication brief and to the point Respect their need for autonomy Be clear about rules and expectations Let them initiate Show your competence Stick to the topic Show independence Eliminate time-wasters

Communicating with “D” Behaviour Be prepared for: Blunt, demanding approaches Lack of empathy Lack of sensitivity Little social interaction

Communicating with “i” Behaviour High I’s want others to be friendly and to recognise their contributions. Try to: Approach them formally Be relaxed and sociable Let them verbalise thoughts and feelings Keep the conversation light Provide written details Give public recognition for individual accomplishments Use humour

Communicating with “i” Behaviour Be prepared for: Attempts to persuade or influence others A need for the limelight Overestimation of self and others Overselling ideas Vulnerability to perceived rejection

Communicating with “S” Behaviour High S’s want others to be relaxed, agreeable, cooperative, and appreciative. Try to Be logical and systematic in your approach Provide a consistent and secure environment Let them know how things will be done Use sincere appreciation Show their importance to the organisation Let them adapt slowly to change

Communicating with “S” Behaviour Be prepared for: Friendliness to colleagues and supervisors Resistance to change Difficulty identifying priorities Difficulty with deadlines

Communicating with “C” Behaviour High C’s want others to minimise socialising, give details, and value accuracy. Try to: Give clear expectations and deadlines Show dependability Demonstrate loyalty Be tactful and emotionally reserved Allow precedent to be a guide Be precise and focussed Value high standards

Communicating with “C” Behaviour Be prepared for: Discomfort with ambiguity Resistance to vague or general information Desire to double-check Little need for affiliation with others

Behaviours in the Extreme In Normal Situations Under Pressure Extreme Behaviour D In charge Decisive Demands Leaves I Persuasive Enthusiastic Oversells Gives up Pouts S Supportive Friendly Gives in Acts hurt Accuses C Careful Quiet Is indecisive Gets emotional Attacks

Communication Filters & Obstacles VALUES BELIEFS ‘MINDSET’ WHAT WE SAY + DO (+ THINK) COMMUNICATION FILTERS EFFECTIVE OR INEFFECTIVE RESULTS

Some Common Communication Filters Prejudice Stress Stereotyping Generalising Assumptions Inattention Thinking we already “know” what the person will say/do Poor listening skills Short attention span “selective” hearing Fixed ideas Preconceptions Tendency to jump to conclusions

Active Listening “It is better to remain quiet and be thought a fool than to speak and remove all doubt.” ACTIVE LISTENING ATTITUDES: Listening is as powerful as speech Listening saves time Listening is important and worthwhile with everyone Anonymous Source: Crystal Clear Communications, Kris Cole

Why Don’t We Listen Better? We think we have something better to say ourselves We are given no reason to listen We think we know what they will say There are too many distractions We are busy listening to our own thoughts Our minds are closed We mentally criticise the message/speaker We would rather be talking so we feel more involved and in control Source: Crystal Clear Communications, Kris Cole

Conclusion “Communication isn’t about us feeding others information or about others pouring their points into our heads. It’s about relationships and understanding expectations. Communication is a dance – something that happens between people. Every dance is different and every dancer is different.” Kris Cole Australian Author

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