Full Draft Final Peer Review Switch papers! WRITE YOUR NAME ON THE BOTTOM OF PAGE 1 OF YOUR PARTNER’S PAPER.

Before we start analyzing… Simply read the paper all the way through without doing anything else. Did the overall paper address key characterization of Hamlet? Was the paper organized? Indicate the answers to the above questions on your peer review sheet. Next, go back through and: Underline the topic sentences at the beginning of each section (it may also be the claim; it may not) Label the transitions at the end of each section (TRANS)

Labeling Make a key at the top of your paper using your highlighters Sample: Blue=Statement Pink=Proof Yellow=Commentary Green= Green Words (Wait for directions on this) Highlight the body paragraphs for statement, proof, and commentary using your key. Do not highlight intro or conclusion.

Ready? Here we go. Be thorough Be tactful FOCUS: NO TALKING BE HONEST, BUT Be thorough Be tactful

Check the Introduction’s Grabber Does your partner have one? Is it effective? Did your partner use a random quote that seems out of place? Let him/her know. If your partner starts off with a question, does it work or does it seem out of place or unrelated? Let him/her know. Give an example of a grabber your partner could use.

Name of play and playwright; basic info Does the intro contain the title of the play? Is the title properly capitalized? Is the title italicized or underlined? If it has quotation marks around it, it’s wrong. Is William Shakespeare spelled correctly? Does the intro offer general info regarding the play that helps lead in to the body of the paper?

Check for word vomit Did your partner use grandiose language about Shakespeare being “the greatest dramatist ever” or perhaps the “most amazing writer who ever lived”? Did you partner refer to Hamlet as the “golden play” or other such nonsense? If so, cross it out.

Thesis Statement Highlight green words in green Check that they are green and NOUNS Make sure it isn’t three-prong Shouldn’t just list green words or personality traits Examples: “Although Hamlet professes to have the motivation to avenge his father's murder, his indecisiveness and lack of candor with those around him thwarts his plans.” “Although Hamlet’s sanity is a focal point throughout the play, ultimately his downfall is in direct relation to his lack of resilience and initiative in avenging his father’s murder.” “Although Hamlet has both the motivation and intelligence to effectively bring his uncle to justice, he lacks the fortitude to carry his plans to fruition.”

Moving to BODY of paper On your peer review paper, move down to the boxes at the bottom labeled “Body paragraphs contain:” Put “Y” or “N” in each box as you go through each paragraph.

Review: What a claim looks like YES NO Hamlet’s procrastination in killing Claudius reveals his perfectionism and strong sense of justice. Hamlet’s indecision, especially concerning suicide, is caused by his logical and fearful nature. Hamlet consistently brings up the topic of suicide throughout the play; many of those instances include self-deprecation. Hamlet’s personality is greatly shown from his continuous self- deprecation through the play.

Sarcasm Claim Check: Claim should be highlighted in blue. YES (Must Have BOTH) If it looks like this, they do NOT have a claim: Includes a claim with a personality trait/ characteristic of Hamlet that we can tell because of his sarcasm. CIRCLE THE TRAIT “Hamlet is sarcastic every chance he gets.” “Hamlet uses sarcasm because he can’t express himself.” “Sarcasm is Hamlet’s main form of communication.” “You can tell a lot about Hamlet’s relationships because he is sarcastic.”

Insanity Claim Check: Claim should be highlighted in blue. YES (Must Have BOTH) If it looks like this, they do not have a claim: Includes a CLEAR claim stating that Hamlet either started off acting and became insane or that Hamlet’s insanity is an act throughout the entire play or that he started off acting but spiraled into his own act ALSO includes a claim about what the answer to the above question indicates about his personality/character. CIRCLE THE CHARACTER TRAIT Commentary includes evidence from the NIH articles “Hamlet portrays insanity.” This is confusing. Unclear if he is acting or if he is insane. “Hamlet has been insane for the entire play.” Not an option. He says he will act at the beginning of he play. “What we can tell from Hamlet’s insanity is that he is weak.” What do you mean by “weak?”

Suicidal Tendencies & Self-Deprecation Claim Check: Claim should be highlighted in blue. YES (Must Have BOTH) If it looks like this, they do not have a claim: Includes a claim about Hamlet’s personality/character based on his tendency to self-deprecate ALSO includes a claim about Hamlet’s personality and mental state based on his talking about suicide and reasons for and against suicide. AND includes a claim about what his reasons for and against suicide say about his character. Remember this section was longer because we analyzed the soliloquy separately. “Hamlet is self-deprecating and this causes his suicidal tendencies.” “Hamlet’s suicidal tendencies show he is a weak character.” What do you mean by “weak?” Be specific. “Hamlet’s reasons for and against suicide show his character” How????

Procrastination and Indecision Claim Check Claim should be highlighted in blue. YES (Must Have BOTH) If it looks like this, they do not have a claim: Includes a claim about Hamlet’s character/personality based on his inability to follow through with his elaborate plans and his constant procrastination. CIRCLE TRAIT ALSO includes a claim about Hamlet’s personality/ character based on his indecisive nature. CIRCLE TRAIT “Hamlet’s procrastination is caused by his indecision” “Hamlet’s procrastination shows he is a weak character.” What do you mean by “weak?” Be specific. “Hamlet’s indecisiveness causes problems for Hamlet.”

Get Rid of Summary Cross out all instances of summary in each section Summary should only be EXTREMELY BRIEF to provide context to quotes. Example: In act one, scene two, just after Hamlet greets Horatio, Hamlet makes the sarcastic comment, “Thrift, thrift, Horatio. The funeral baked meats did coldly furnish forth the marriage tables.” (172-173). “just after Hamlet greets Horatio” gives context but does not waste space with summary

Eyeballing Percentages FOR EACH SECTION, look at what you highlighted. Is more than 15-20% of what your partner wrote pink? If so, they need to shorten quotes, develop commentary, or both. Write which one(s) you think they need to do If quotes are too long, cross out the part(s) of the quotes you think are unnecessary for their purposes. Quotes should not go on for more than two typed lines

Commentary Does the commentary for EACH paragraph match the statement? Is there a thorough explanation of what we know about Hamlet’s character? Use the boxes on the peer review to indicate your answer. IF THE ANSWER IS “NO,” THEN IN THE MARGIN OF THE PAPER WRITE “Underdeveloped.” Commentary (YELLOW) should be the bulk of the paper!

Citation format Did the author consistently use EITHER Roman numerals (IV.i.27-9) ACT in Uppercase, scene in lowercase OR Arabic numbering (4.1.27-9) Are line breaks indicated? For articles: Title of article in quotation marks followed by page number (“What is Depression?” 2)

Quotes Are the quotes integrated (couched) into the author’s own sentences? Mark any “orphan” quotes

Go back to the Thesis Statement Check thesis against personality traits identified in claims. Does it match or does it contradict what the writer says in the body of the paper about Hamlet?

Mechanics Check Check for: Comma usage Apostrophes: Hamlet’s vs. Hamlets, Ophelia’s vs. Ophelia’s, etc. Hamlet, the play vs. Hamlet, the man (vs. hamlet, the small village) Capitalization of proper nouns Elsinore, Hamlet, Gertrude, Claudius, Ophelia, Polonius, Laertes, Fortinbras, Denmark, Norway, Poland

Mechanics Check Spelling Word choice that isn’t quite right. remember it’s erratic behavior, not erotic behavior He self-deprecates; he does not self-defecate If you spell a character’s name wrong, then you are just being lazy. It’s all over the text; just copy it for heaven’s sake. Word choice that isn’t quite right. Run-on sentences and sentence fragments Anything else you see. Even if you aren’t sure, mark it. You know when something doesn’t look or sound quite right. Your partner will know to double-check.

Language Register Check Are they staying in formal register? Look back at notes to check. Includes using “I,” “you,” “me,” “my,” and “we” Use a pen or a pencil to circle any register drops and write “register” next to these circled areas.

Finish Peer Review sheet Go back through the essay one last time and fill out the rest of the Peer Review sheet. Staple it to the paper and pass it on to the next reviewer. Repeat the process with reviewer #2. If we don’t have time in class, have a parent, a sibling, or a friend run through it. This ppt is on my website.

On the Due Date: Final copy This workshopped draft with peer reviews All sections that have been graded along the way Turnitin.com receipt. Even if you are not here, it is due. You will need to make arrangements to have it to me by the beginning of your class period. If you are missing your turnitin.com receipt, it is considered late, even if you have everything else with you.