Gender Differences Interuptions Speaking before the other has finished Overlaps Speaking at the same time 1

Gender Differences Interuptions Speaking before the other has finished Overlaps Speaking at the same time Minimal responses yes, uh huh, yeah 2

Gender Differences Interuptions Speaking before the other has finished Overlaps Speaking at the same time Minimal responses yes, uh huh, yeah Tag questions right, don't you, you think? 3

Gender Differences 1970s study Adults interrupt children more than children adults 4

Gender Differences 1970s study Adults interrupt children more than children adults Men interrupt women more This shows adult and male dominance 5

Gender Differences 1970s study Women use more tag questions Women hedge more sort of, I guess, maybe, I could be wrong 6

Gender Differences 1970s study Women use more tag questions Women hedge more sort of, I guess, maybe, I could be wrong Women use more upspeak 7

Gender Differences 1970s study Women use more tag questions Women hedge more sort of, I guess, maybe, I could be wrong Women use more upspeak This shows women are less dominant 8

Gender Differences 1990s study No gender differences 9

Gender Differences 1990s study No gender differences Regardless of gender, dominate people interrupt more, hedge less, use fewer tag questions 10

Gender Differences Men use language to convey information Women use language to establish and maintain relationships 11

Gender Differences Men use language to convey information Women use language to establish and maintain relationships Bob: I'm going camping with John and Paul this weekend. (Information conveyed) Jane: What? You never discussed that with me. (Couples should talk about things) Bob: Since when do I need my wife's permission? (I'm independent) Jane: You don't, but we should have discussed it before (I don't deny your independence but by not discussing it it makes me feel like I'm not important to you) 12

Gender Differences Jane: How was your day today? Bob: Fine? Jane: What did you do. Bob: You know, worked. Jane: (Why won't he talk to me to help maintain our relationship?) Bob: (There is no new information to convey so no conversation is necessary.) Jane: Well, I blah, blah, blah, . . . (details of her daily activities). Bob: (Why does she have to tell me all of this unessential, trivial stuff? She talks too much.) 13

Gender Differences Men interpret language in terms of independence and superiority or inferiority between speakers Women interpret language in terms of intimacy, relationships 14

Gender Differences Men interpret language in terms of independence and superiority or inferiority between speakers Women interpret language in terms of intimacy, relationships Acknowledgments in a book: I'd like to thank my husband for his help. Male interpretation: She wasn't competent enough to write it herself? Female interpretation: The author is expressing her intimacy with her husband. 15

Gender Differences Men interpret language in terms of independence and superiority or inferiority between speakers Women interpret language in terms of intimacy, relationships Why did you become a university professor Men: freedom and self-determination Women: to influence the students 16

Gender Differences Men discuss problems in order to find solutions Women discuss problems in order to find consolation Bob: I've really been bothered by . . . Jane: Yeah, I know how you feel. Once something similar happened to me . . . Bob: (She was no help. She just wanted to talk about her own problems.) 17

Gender Differences Men discuss problems in order to find solutions Women discuss problems in order to find consolation Jane: I've really been bothered by . . . Bob: In that case, you ought to . . . Jane: (What a jerk, he doesn't understand a bit how I am feeling.) 18

Gender Differences Men discuss problems in order to find solutions Women discuss problems in order to find consolation Jane: I've really been bothered by . . . Bob: In that case, you ought to . . . Jane: (What a jerk, he doesn't understand a bit how I am feeling.) Bob: I've really been bothered by . . . Dick: In that case, you ought to . . . or, don't sweat it, it's not that bad. Bob: (Dick gave me some good advice.) 19

Gender Differences Men discuss problems in order to find solutions Women discuss problems in order to find consolation Jane: I've really been bothered by . . . Sara: Yeah, I know how you feel. Once something similar happened to me . . . Jane: (Sara is a good friend who understands what I'm going through.) 20

Gender Differences Other differences Men spent time talking about things (sports, politics, movies) to see who was the most knowledgeable. Men tell jokes. Men get prestige by their knowledge or skill. Men tell stories in which they play the central role and cast themselves in a good light. Stories deal with contests (physical, verbal, hunting). 21

Gender Differences Other differences Men spent time talking about things (sports, politics, movies) to see who was the most knowledgeable. Men tell jokes. Men get prestige by their knowledge or skill. Men tell stories in which they play the central role and cast themselves in a good light. Stories deal with contests (physical, verbal, hunting). Women talked about person things and revealed more about their feelings in order to develop intimacy. Women don't tell jokes. Women gain prestige by their affiliations with others. Women discuss community matters and share incidences in which they did something foolish or broke a societal norm. 22

Gender Differences Other differences Women say "yeah, I see" to show they understand what is said (show support of speaker). 23

Gender Differences Other differences Women say "yeah, I see" to show they understand what is said (show support of speaker). Men interpret “yeah, I see" to mean “I agree with you.” 24

Gender Differences Other differences Men use opposition such as teasing, harassing, bantering, wrestling to show friendship (Boy teasing girl he likes). Bragging and one-upmanship is not looked down upon. 25

Gender Differences Other differences Men use opposition such as teasing, harassing, bantering, wrestling to show friendship (Boy teasing girl he likes). Bragging and one-upmanship is not looked down upon. For women this is confrontational and shows antagonism not solidarity.Women use solidarity and consensus: try to include others, treat others as equals, avoid conflict, be peacemakers, affirm each other's feelings. A woman who brags or is more successful, gets better grades, wears better clothes is moving beyond a position of equality and solidarity and may lose friends. 26