Writing HSC Responses

Building Programs OR Amarna Period Abu simbel ‘Ramesses II’ AkHENATEN adoring the Aten

PULL APART THE QUESTIONS Key Terminology (p.134) EXAMINE – inquire into EXPLAIN – make the relationships between things evident, relate cause and effect DESCRIBE – characteristics and features of ASSESS – make a judgement of value

PULL APART THE QUESTIONS 2) Planning Building Program Amarna Period Clearly answer the question Successful reign because… List your main arguments By Pharaoh (Akhenaten and Ramesses II) By Building (Temple at Karnak) By category (Political Significance/Religious) EVIDENCE Amarna period had a huge impact on New Kingdom Egypt because… Chronologically (Amenhotep III – Tutankhamun) By changes (From Amun to Aten and its effect, visa versa) By evidence/Effect

Introductions 1. Restate/ANSWER the question 2. Outline your thesis (your main argument) 3. Outline your points to follow – this is essentially a road map for your essay: ‘E.g. This essay will explore / examine / evaluate….’ Provide necessary background / context – “what is the Amarna period, who started it, why buildings are relevant to the reign of a pharaoh ATTEMPT to arouse the reader’s interest with an interesting quote or discussion of the significance or gravity of the situation

Introductions – From the Markers “Another feature of superior responses was their structure, typically an introduction which responded directly to the question and outlined the argument to be presented, followed by a well-organised response that addressed all aspects of the question.”

Explain your approach EXAMPLE FOR Q1 OF YOUR INTRO To truly comprehend the extent of “successfulness’ during a pharaoh’s reign one can simply look to the monumental building programs implemented during the rule of most New Kingdom Pharaoh’s. From the small contributions of Amenhotep III on the Grand Temple of Amun-Re at Karnak to the creation entire cities of Akhenaten (Akhetaten) and Ramesses II (Per Ramesses), each building program reflected the true ‘success of each Pharaoh’s rule. Not only did these Pharaonic builders of new Kingdom Egypt build for glory, but it enabled them to sums up the politico-religious activities the building programs pursued as “Idealogy needs architecture for its fullest expression” (Kemp, B).

Explain your approach Q2) What do you think of this thesis During the revolutionary Amarna period, Egypt’s religious landscape was dramatically overhauled, significantly impacting and disrupting Egyptian unity. The changes were plentiful, and often quite upsetting due to their radical, abstract nature and implementation. The primary change in policy was a forced shift in observance of the Amun cult to Atenism. Other supplementary changes included a shift from henotheism to monotheism, and deification of the Pharaoh during his reign. The result of these upheavals was widespread disunity and disillusionment in Egyptian society, ranging from the military to politics.

Structure of Body Paragraphs In English, you use TEEL In History, aim for TEAL The difference is ANALYSIS. Judging to what extent something was a factor in contributing to the revolutionary changes during Amarna OR the archaeological building sites reflecting the achievement of Pharaoh’s in New Kingdom Egypt

Analytical Paragraphs TOPIC SENTENCE – make a reasonably general remark relevant to the question. EVIDENCE – provide topic-specific detail, e.g. dates, people, events, ideas, organisations, places, data, etc. Analysis – explore the significance of the evidence THIS IS WHERE YOUR EVALUATIVE ASSESSMENT of the methods WILL COME INTO PLAY! Link – make an interim summary linked firmly to the question.

AVOID DON’T ‘TELL STORIES’ – DON’T BE GENERAL. EVIDENCE AND ANALYSIS ARE CRUCIAL TO PERFORM WELL. NEVER use 1st person (I; me; my) Always stick to question (Be clear what the question is asking before you start) Don’t make critical statements like - ‘the people hated Akhenaten– this does not show complex understanding. Don’t say ‘the people’ thought...’ What people?– do all people react the same way? DO use analytical words like polarised, catalyst, galvanised, heightened tensions, exacerbated….

NOW SEE WHAT YOU LEARNT Re-write your THESIS and 1ST PARAGRAPH You can look over your notes before you start Within the same time frame (20 minutes) You may refer to your previous attempt.