Interpersonal Communication

Definition The art of getting along with and communicating effectively with other people – especially in a one-on-one setting.

Complex Process Particularly when the term involves certain rules that are appropriate in both social and professional situations. If you don’t know what’s allowed and what’s not, then you have no chance of succeeding because you are constantly working “in the dark.”

Social Communication This is the communication that occurs in your personal and your community life.

Professional Communication This is the communication that takes place on the job or is related to your career.

Respectful 70% of our day is spent working and interacting with other people. Appropriate interpersonal communication is respectful communication. When you speak to someone you make direct eye contact. When you meet your prospective boss, you offer a firm handshake. When the teacher is ready to begin, you end your personal conversation.

Courtesy vs Tact Courtesy refers to the way that you treat people. It mean politeness. Tact refers to the way that you deal with people. It means being diplomatic; you try to say or do what is most fitting based on the occasion.

Appropriate Tone

Aggressive tone This approach is often pushy and brash. Considers only one point of view – their own. This approach wants to win at all costs, even if that means intimidating, manipulating, or belittling others in the process. Inappropriate!

Nonassertive Tone This approach shows a lack of action and energy. This personal rarely speaks and often appears disinterested or uninvolved. This tone communicates: “I lack self-confidence, don’t believe my ideas are any good, or just don’t care about what is going on. Inappropriate at work

Assertive Tone This is the middle ground between aggressive and nonassertive. This approach is direct, yet tactful. They create an overall mood of harmony because they always consider the following specifics before acting or speaking:

Appropriate! Location – Right place to talk? Timing – Right time to talk? Intensity – What can I do to keep calm and not come off as overbearing? Relationships – How well do I know the person to whom I’m about to speak? How does each person’s role and responsibility affect this situation? Appropriate!

Beware of Gossip!

Interpersonal communication is irreversible. Messages can not be taken back once they are uttered. Actions and spoken messages make an impression that can not be erased.

People Skills When you have people skills you exhibit the ability to work well with others because you take time to make them feel at ease. These people know the value and appropriateness of: Making introductions Participating effectively in conversations Offering and receiving criticism Giving clear and accurate directions

Making Introductions Stop what you are doing Be friendly Address everyone by name Introduce others Ask a question or make a comment to get others talking Work to make everyone included in the conversation

Handshake First, make friendly eye contact Next, don’t be afraid to extend your hand first Finally, offer a firm but relaxed grip on the other person’s hand. Socially and professionally, the “hand of friendship” is appropriate and is seen as a sign of interpersonal respect.

Participating Effectively in Conversations Conversation, or dialogue, is the oral exchange of thoughts and feelings involving two or more people. “It takes two to Tango.”

Conversation Killers Talking too much: don’t be a motor mouth or know- it-all Talking too little: long “dead spots” of silence make everyone uncomfortable. You appear uninterested or boring. Interrupting others: The quickest way to break up a conversation is to cut people off when they begin to speak or to interrupt them while speaking.

Offering and Receiving Criticism Criticism means an evaluation or judgment. It does not have to be a negative experience.

Offering Criticism We should view offering criticism as a way of encouraging someone to improve. Your language should be friendly, your nonverbal communication congenial, and your overall message informative and instructive. Offer possible solutions.

Receiving Criticism Maintain your composure Allow others to finish what they have to say Don’t interrupt Be a good listener Courteously ask questions Thank the person for their thoughts and observations

Giving Directions Always be CLEAR Always be COMPLETE Always be CONCISE Always be CONSIDERATE

Building Relationships Knowing the appropriate rules of communication – specifically interpersonal communication – when dealing with a diverse group of people not only makes you more appealing, it also allows you to be a more effective communicator with all types of audiences.

Don’t mimic Italians’ hand gestures. Arrive on time for business meetings with Germans. Keep your suit jacket on when dining with the French. Be reserved about touching or demonstrating other displays of affection with the British. Bow at a 15-degree angle when meeting Japanese. Make eye contact when you shake hands with Americans. Do not shake hands or exchange greetings with the Russians in doorways, as they believe that it may bring bad luck.