RELATIONSHIPS

VARIOUS RELATIONSHIPS: Friends Family Dates Coaches/teachers work

HEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS 3 C’S COMMUNICATION COMPROMISE COOPERATION

Communication The process of sharing information, thoughts , or feelings. Communication occurs whenever you use words, sounds, gestures, or body movements to interact with other people.

ROLE PLAY Tom was suppose to pick Mike up for a party last Saturday night at 7:30pm. Tom and Mike had been planning on attending this party for 2 weeks…Mike’s parent’s gave the thumbs up; everyone was going. Saturday arrives…no Tom. Tom doesn’t answer Mike’s calls, email or tex….Mike ends up staying home. First thing Monday morning Mike runs into Tom in the hallway near his locker….Mike turns to Tom and says?????????

Effective Communication Active Listening “I Message” Assertiveness Body Language

Active Listening Active listening is focusing your full attention on what the other person is saying and letting that person know you understand and care.

Active Listening Focus your FULL attention on what the other person is saying Make EYE CONTACT Show interest by nodding your head and showing concern (facial expression) Offer comments, “I know what you mean…” Try not to steer the conversation away from the speaker and onto YOU Show you have been listening by summarizing the speakers ideas, “It sounds like you were angry when…” “I heard you say…”. Clarifying a response, Summarizing a response, Restating or affirming a response

“ I MESSAGE” An “I” message is a statement that expresses your true feelings, but does not blame or judge the other person. For example, you can say to a friend, “I am upset that we didn’t talk last night.”

ASSERTIVENESS Assertive? – are you able to stand up for yourself while expressing your feelings in a way that does not threaten the other person or without YOU feeling threatened. Aggressive? – do you communicate opinions and feelings in a way that may seem threatening or disrespectful to other people? Passive? – do you hold back your true feelings and go along with the other person?

Body Language Communicating information or feelings/emotions nonverbally, through body movements, posture, gestures, and facial expressions Silent messages through body language: Sometimes a person’s body language matches their spoken word, Other times, the messages you send with your body language may contradict what you are saying. (example- someone might smile while saying something cruel) Body language varies from culture to culture. (Most Americans expect you to make eye contact when talking with them. In Japanese cultures, eye contact in certain situations is a sign of disrespect)

WHO WON????

WHO’S FIGHTING?

Strong Communications Skills Help to: 1. Protect from unsafe situations 2. Promote healthy lifestyles 3. Increase sharing of ideas and views

Cooperation Working together for a common goal. Builds strong relationships, based on mutual: CARING TRUST RESPONSIBILTY Everybody on the team must meet their responsibilities and trust others to meet theirs. Examples of cooperation in a relationship?

Compromise Willingness of each person to give up something in order to reach an agreement. GIVE AND TAKE When you are willing to compromise, you let the other person know how important the relationship is to you. What situations should you NOT compromise?

Problems in Friendships Some possible problems in friendships are envy cruelty cliques jealousy

Problems with Friends Envy: Envy can occur when one person has something that the other person desires. Jealousy: Jealousy can occur when a “best” friend wants to develop more close friendships and the first friend feels left out. Peer Pressure: The need to conform to the expectations of friends. Cruelty: If a friend is cruel to you, confront your friend to find out what the real problem is. Communicate that you are not willing to be mistreated. Transfer of Anger (close friends see your anger): The need to conform to the expectations of friends.

CLIQUES Cliques : A narrow, exclusive group of people with similar backgrounds and interest. Clique members may experience a need to conform to the expectations of friends.

Problems with Cliques? Advantages: Disadvantages:

Prejudice Prejudice- Negative feelings about certain groups of people that are based on stereotypes Stereotypes- Exaggerated or over generalized belief about an entire group such as ethnic, religious, gender or other groups of people EXAMPLES? Have you ever been victim of prejudice? Have you ever been stereotyped?

CYBER BULLYING/BULLYING Recognizing? Repercussions? Quiz for HW

FRIENDS OF THE OPPOSITE SEX Elementary school, most youngsters have friends of the same sex. As you get older you probably have both male and female friends  Opposite-sex friendships develop more often now than in earlier generations because of changes in gender roles (behaviors and attitudes that are socially accepted as either masculine or feminine.  A friendship with the opposite sex may develop into a romantic relationship.

DATING Do you think dating in high school is a good idea? Why or why not? By dating you can learn about his or her personality, interests, abilities and values.

Relationship Queries Can guys and girls be just friends? Is it OK for a girl to have male friends if she is in a relationship and vise-versa. Can a “Friends with Benefits” relationship work? Seinfeld-This & That (2:22)

Unhealthy Relationships Is it okay for a girl to hit a guy? Physical abuse is much easier to detect than Emotional and Psychological abuse.

VIOLENCE IN DATING Dating Violence is a pattern of emotional, physical, or sexual abuse that occurs in a dating relationship.

WHY DO PEOPLE STAY IN ABUSIVE REATIONSHIPS?

WARNINGS SIGNS OF ABUSE Your date is jealous when you talk to others  Your date makes all the decisions and tries to control what you do  Your date has a history of bad relationships  You feel isolated from your friends and family  You feel less self-confident – You worry about doing or saying the right thing – You change how you behave to avoid an argument.

ENDING THE ABUSE Step 1 – admit to yourself that you are in an abusive relationship.  Step 2 – realize that you are not to blame  Step 3 – Seek support from family and friends. - Can call a hotline for anonymous advice

DATE RAPE When rape occurs during a date.  The rapist may have used a “date rape drug”  These fact acting drugs are hard to detect – odorless, colorless, tasteless.  Later, the victim will feel hung over, and be unable to recall the rape.  Men can be victims too. Under the Influence

Videos MTV-Teen-Dating Abuse Victim MTV-how to stop teen-dating violence

RESISTANCE SKILLS: Skills that help a person say “no” to an action or leave a situation are called: