Amy Millspaugh, Andrea Sowell Shanqueetay Easley, Yoneko Washington Bullying Amy Millspaugh, Andrea Sowell Shanqueetay Easley, Yoneko Washington

Purpose School Counselors working with parents to create a safe environment for students This presentation focuses on parental awareness of bullying in the school system. The school counselors are working to create a safe school environment for all students with the help of the parents and the community.

Victims of Bullying http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OD-OaZbRL4s&feature=related http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OD-OaZbRL4s&feature=related

How much do you know about Bullying? Parents will complete a Pre/Post Test on how much they know about bullying.

goals Identify the indicators of Boys and Girls Bullying Identify the indicators of Cyberbullying Identify the responsibilities of school, staff, and parents Identify interventions to help prevent bullying

National Institute of Child Health and Human Development(2009) Statistics One incident of bullying happens every 7 minutes Bullying affects nearly 1 out of every 3 children in grades 6-10. 55% of 8-11 year-olds and 68% of 12-15 year-olds say bullying is a big problem. National Institute of Child Health and Human Development(2009)

And the Survey Says………. A nationwide survey highlighted by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) found that 6.6 percent of students in grades 9-12 had missed at least one day of school during the 30 days preceding the survey because they felt unsafe at school or on their way to or from school. A review of 1999 data collected by the Federal government on school safety among 12- to 18-year-old students found that approximately 36 percent of students reported seeing hate-related graffiti at school. Surveys done by Center for Disease Control and the Federal government.

Key facts Adults are not as responsive to bullying as we should be (and as children want us to be) Adults overestimate their effectiveness in identifying bullying and intervening. Bullying can occur anywhere—even where adults are present.

Let’s talk bully Studies show that children identified as bullies by age 8 are six times more likely to be convicted of a crime by age 24. 60% of kids characterized as bullies in the 6th- 9th grade had at least one criminal conviction by age 24. Bullies are five times more likely to end up with a serious criminal record by age 30.

Two types of bullying School Bullying Cyberbullying

Definition Bullying-An aggressive behavior that is intentional and that involves an imbalance of power and strength Cyberbullying – The act of bullying online consisting of one person or small group of people attacking each other via an internet-enabled desktop computer

Who is a bully? Some common characteristics: Impulsive, confrontational, domineering, easily irritated, lack compassion Struggles with being compliant to rules Views violence in a positive manner Tend to be physically stronger than other children

Types of bullying… Physical any physical harm to include: hitting, punching, kicking and destruction of other child’s property Verbal includes teasing, name-calling, taunting and racial slurs, as well as spreading gossip or malicious rumors Cyberbullying includes harassing e-mails or instant messages, as well as intimidating or threatening Web sites or blogs Relational aggression not allowing the person to speak to other children or be spoken to (primarily seen among girls)

The bully…

Statistics… Some studies suggest that 1 out of 7 children in the United States have either been the victim of bullying or has been the perpetrator of bullying against another student.

Statistics cont…. 60 % of boys identified as bullies in grades 6 to 9 had one criminal conviction and 40% had three or more. Those identified as bullies at age 8 had a one in four chance of having a criminal record by 30. (Norm is one in 20) (Eron and Huessman, 1987)

Who is targeted?… Two types of victims: the passive victim, the shy child who is viewed as weak and… the provoking victim, the child that may initiate negative interactions with others

The bullying circle

Signs of child being bullied… Damaged or missing personal belongings Unexplained bruises or injuries Few friends Reluctance of going to school Poor school performance Headaches, stomachaches or other physical complaints Difficulty sleeping or eating

Victims of bullying suffer from… Fear of going to school Headaches & stomachaches Difficulty concentrating on schoolwork Long-term bullying causes: Higher rates of depression, anxiety, low self-esteem and other mental health conditions. Suicidal ideation and suffer from lingering wounds in adulthood

Why do bullies bully? Sometimes they may… think they will win or get what they want want to impress or entertain friends enjoy power over others because sometimes they are being bullied lack awareness that they are hurting others

Family influence of bullies… Parents that show little affection and involvement Extremely lenient parenting Very little supervision Severe physical discipline Bullying behavior at home

Message for bullies…

Cyberbullying Previous methods Current methods Chatrooms Blog sites Cell phones Internet MySpace Facebook (Angela)

-or to damage someone’s reputation Intent What is the goal? -to control -to threaten -to intimidate -to invade privacy -to scare -to annoy and harass -to spread rumors -to gossip -to be cruel -or to damage someone’s reputation

? Who are they? Girl Boy Man Woman old Friends Students young predator Pedophile old Boy Man Woman predator

Things we know Most common school bullies are the same bullies in cyberspace. Most common school victims are the same victims in cyberspace. The bullying behavior transfers from the internet to the school There are no boundaries in cyberspace, anything goes (Netiquette). It is a misdemeanor for any bullying behaviors over cyberspace, including texting, chatrooms, blogs, sexting, and cyberstalking. (VT, OH)

How to identify Starts spending excessive time on the internet late at night Starts receiving phone calls late at night Child minimizes pages quickly Hiding conversations Withdrawing from families, friends, or school activities

Stop Block Tell

What do I do? Keep a record of contacts from the harasser. Report harassment to your internet service provider (ISP). Get the school involved and aware of what is going on. Notify the police online crimes department. If the harassment is severe, contact the local FBI. NEVER plan to meet the harasser!! Do not leave your computer logged in unattended. Get in the habit of changing your password frequently. Check their email signature for personal information. Do NOT panic!

How do I protect? -monitor your child’s usage -learn about this technology and how it fits in their life -help understand what is appropriate/inappropriate -adjust your privacy settings -Google your child’s name and monitor what comes up

Common adult feelings on bullying Life Character Fail to notice Ignore it Blame Fight

My child the bully

What it looks like Bad Attitude Low Self-Esteem Bullying Siblings

What can I do? Take it seriously. Another child is being hurt Talk to your child Home life (Don’t Be a Bully) Problem Solving Positive Feedback Prevention Programs Support

School involvement Ask a teacher or a school counselor if your child is facing any problems at school, such as if your child is struggling with a particular subject or has difficulty making friends. Ask if you can become more involved at school Ask them for advice on how you and your child can work through the problem.

Letter from a bully http://pathwayscourses.samhsa.gov/bully/bully_1_pg2.htm

My child the bystander Two out of three kids want to help when they see bullying, and helping out is one of the most effective ways to stop bullying and prevent it from happening again. When friends help out, 57 percent of the time bullying stops in 10 seconds (Hawkins, Pepler, and Craig, Social Development, 2001). There are effective and safe ways for kids to step in and help others being bullied. Some work better in certain situations than others. You can help kids decide when to use each method by role-playing bullying situations with them. Remember to emphasize that kids should only step in when they feel safe.

How does my child feel? Angry Helpless Guilty Unsafe Fear

How can I help? Social Skills Get to know their friends Teach Assertiveness Teach Compassion Be a good example. Show kids safe ways to help others. Hold kids accountable. Educate

School involvement Ask reporting policy Ask who can your child talk to you Ask if they have a curriculum or programs

What to look for… Withdrawal Loss of Friends Grades Drop Loss of Interest Torn Clothing Bruises Extra Needs

How can I help? Focus on child Be Supportive Gather Info Teach Avoidance Check your emotions Educate

How can I help? Communication Online Friends Contact School and/or Police Don’t Erase Contact Websites/Mobile Phone Providers

What can I do before Bullying Occurs? Help Develop Encourage Positive Friendships Teach Safety Strategies Home Security

Bully webisode http://www.stopbullyingnow.hrsa.gov/kids/webisodes/webisode-06.aspx

remember Children and youth report that bullying typically happens in unsupervised areas. The more adults who are watching for bullying, the better. Adults are responsible for creating safe. When bullying is overlooked by adults, children and youth are less likely to report it because they expect nothing will be done.

The golden rule Treat others the way you want to be treated. Stand up for someone when he or she needs it, and when you need it, someone will stand up for you.

www.epic.org Privacy tools www.haltabuse.org (WHOA) Parent Resources www.isafe.org www.privacyrights.org www.epic.org Privacy tools Privacy Alliance www.safetyweb.com www.staysafe.org www.safeteens.com www.haltabuse.org (WHOA)

References Bullying: Help your child handle a school bully (2010). Children’ s Health (25). Retrieved from http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/bullying/MH00126 Cyberbullying (July 16, 2010). Retrieved on July 21, 2010 from www.safetyweb.com. For Kids (2005). Stop bullying now. Retrieved from http://www.kzoo.edu/psych/stop_bullying/for_kids/what_is_a_bully.html For Parents (2005). Stop bullying now. Retrieved from http://www.kzoo.edu/psych/stop_bullying/forparents/general_information.html For Teachers (2005). Stop bullying now. Retrieved from http://www.kzoo.edu/psych/stop_bullying/forteachers/what_is_bullying.html

More references Greco, J., Carneval, K., Cary, J., Laurenza, C. (2008). Partnering to prevent k-5 bullying. ASCA 2008 Annual Conference. Susan Kuchinskas http://www.familygoesstrong.com/did-you-birth-bully?gclid=CKK0peP7_aICFRRsswodhUl0dQ http://www.ncpc.org/topics/bullying/bullying-/what-parents-can-do http://www.ncpc.org/topics/bullying/teaching-kids-about-bullying/what-to-teach-kids-about-bullying   http://www.nde.state.ne.us/SAFETY/Bullying%20Prevention/BullyingPreventionPreventionandInterventionStrategies.htm

More references http://www.parentfurther.com/high-riskbehaviors/bullying?utm_campaign=parentfurther-search&utm_medium=search&utm_source=google&utm_term=bullying Http://www.pbs.org/parents/itsmylife/resources/bullies.html?anchor=lesson_plans U. S. Department of Health(2010). Stop bullying now. Retrieved on July 21, 2010 from www.stopbullyingnow.hrsa.gov. Wilson, K. (2007). Cyberbullying: A seven-step model to prevention. Retrieved from www.ASCA.com/2007/cyberbullying www.cartoonstock.com