The Gerbil’s Adventure writing expansion pack

Tell your partner what a report looks like- what features would you find? Features of a report… Topic sentences introduce each paragraph Usually written in present tense Descriptive and technical language Passive constructions of sentences Impersonal third person

Gerbils are small mammals and are part of the rodent family Gerbils are small mammals and are part of the rodent family. Brought from China to Paris in the 19th century, they became popular household pets although they originated from Africa and Asia. Adapted to live in arid areas, they were given the name desert rats and there are over 110 varieties. Gerbils can be kept in homes, but they need different cages to other similar pets such as mice or hamsters. Tunnels are dug by the gerbils; plastic tunnels that can be bought from a pet shop are not suitable as they can chew the plastic and choke on it. The burrows can be as deep as 1.7m and contain food and nests. They horde their food, so it is vital they have somewhere to store it. Like other animals, they have mating rituals. They will mate over a number of hours, and can be observed mating for a short time before chasing one another. Gerbils live in groups in the wild and are social creatures, however, they may kill other gerbils who do not have a familiar scent. Although they can be found and live in the wild, the gerbil’s diet can be adapted. Their cage must have fresh water and food, and contrary to belief they are omnivores rather than herbivores. They can be fed special food, which gives them all the nutrients they need.

Mrs Creighton caught a mouse. A mouse was caught by Mrs Creighton. To change a sentence from active to passive, swap over the subject and object. Top Tip! If you struggle to write passive sentences, write the active form first. Creating passive sentences

Passive sentences are often used in texts like reports to make them more impersonal. They follow the same pattern for any form of tense: [Thing receiving action] + [be] + [past participle of verb] + [by] + [thing doing action] Active: Luna grabbed the TV remote. Passive: The TV remote was grabbed by Luna. Creating passive sentences- verb forms

Creating passive sentences Now try these. Remember to move the object to the start of the sentence. You may also have to change the form of the verb. The boy ate the sweets. Jenny dropped the plate. Jack broke the laptop. Creating passive sentences

Creating passive sentences- answers The sweets were eaten by the boy. The plate was dropped by Jenny. The laptop was broken by Jack. Creating passive sentences- answers

Creating research questions It is important to ensure that you have enough information inside each of your paragraphs. Reread through the exemplar text. Which sentence of each paragraph tells you what the paragraph is about? The first sentence of a paragraph is called a topic sentence. They are vital in non-fiction texts to signpost to the reader what the paragraph is going to be about. Look at each topic sentence carefully. Can you try to write the research question that the author used? Creating research questions

Now choose your report topic

Writing an introduction Let’s look at our introduction again. Gerbils are small mammals and are part of the rodent family. Brought from China to Paris in the 19th century, they became popular household pets although they originated from Africa and Asia. Adapted to live in arid areas, they were given the name desert rats and there are over 110 varieties. What information are you given? General opening description- including technical language: “rodent” Historical relevance: “brought from China” How the gerbils survived: “adapted” Make a bullet pointed list of the information you need to include in your opening. Remember, it should be a generalised paragraph- don’t go into too much detail. Writing an introduction

rodent originated mammal adaptation herbivores indigenous Some people find it difficult to use technical language in their report, however, it doesn’t need to be as difficult as you think. Let’s take the gerbil example: rodent originated mammal adaptation herbivores indigenous Now, make a list of the technical language you want to use. This is often the easiest way of doing it because you can make a checklist. That way, you won’t forget to include it. Sources may include encyclopaedias, websites, books or dictionaries. Using technical language

Read through this extract and change the verbs from past tense to present tense. Today was the day, I told myself as the shop lights flickered on. I heard the rattling of cages overhead, and knew that the white mice above me had woken. Blinking slowly, I stumbled nearer my water bottle. I knew that I shouldn’t have been up all night, and that I was paying the price now, but I just had to beat my record on the spinning wheel. I could barely walk. Instead of feeling like a 6- month-old gerbil, I felt like a geriatric hamster in need of crutches. Checking tense

Read through this extract and change the verbs from past tense to present tense. Today is the day, I tell myself as the shop lights flicker on. I hear the rattling of cages overhead, and know that the white mice above me have woken. Blinking slowly, I stumble nearer my water bottle. I know that I shouldn’t have been up all night, and that I am paying the price now, but I just have to beat my record on the spinning wheel. I can barely walk. Instead of feeling like a 6- month-old gerbil, I feel like a geriatric hamster in need of crutches. Checking tense

Steps to Success Write a clear introduction that shows what your report is about. Write in third person. (They/ He/ She) Use some passive constructions of sentences. Write in present tense unless your subject is deceased. Use technical language when describing.