Coffee with the Counselors Presents: Worry, Anxiety, and Stress In Elementary School

What is a worry? A state of uncertainty over actual or potential problems. If worries become persistent they can lead to stress and anxiety.

What is Stress? The brain’s response to any demand. Stress is a normal physical response, but can become abnormal should the stress be long term and continuous.

What is Anxiety? Generalized Anxiety- Uncontrollable worry over day to day events. Fears may be unrealistic and can be accompanied by physical symptoms. 3 ingredients: Biology, personality, and stress overload

Personality traits of an anxious child Responsible Perfectionist Difficulty relaxing Likes to please Avoids conflict Prefers Structure Low assertiveness

Stress Sources Family and Relationships lack of social skills family crisis Family changes including separation or divorce lack of positive peer/familial connections Death or sickness of a loved one Parent loss of job School work is difficult too much work too many activities/transitions long days lack of positive adult/peer connections

What to look for… Irritable Often tired Disturbed sleep Somatic symptoms: stomach aches, headaches, etc. Extreme distress over seperation Unrealistic worry about harm to self or others Frequent trips to the nurse Unwillingness to leave home, attend school, or go on outings Over eating or drinking or under eating or drinking Seeking frequent reassurance Perfectionism Unable to relax Anticipation of an event may lead to panic Concern about humiliation or embarrassment Poor concentration Avoidance of social situations

What can you do at home? Seek advice from your pediatrician Develop a routine for home(bedtime, wake up time, eating, sleeping) Role playing potentially anxiety provoking situations with your child Listen to your child’s concerns and validate their feelings even if it seems unrealistic Talk to your child and help them problem solve Maintain realistic expectations and goals Make it a point to accept mistakes- mistakes are a part of learning Practice ways to relax with your child- reading a book, yoga, stretching, exercise, listening to music, taking walk, etc. Seek outside counseling support if worrying is persistent Reach out to your child’s school to talk about concerns your child is having Teach your child to self advocate for their needs

What we do at school... Work with students one on one, in small groups, and within classrooms on identifying negative feelings and managing them, problem solving, and social skills Teachers develop routines that are clear and consistent Refer to outside counseling supports and home supports Support families with information and resources

Sources Wagner, Aureen Pinto, Ph.D. (2002)Worried No More. Help and Hope for Anxious Children: Second Edition. Lighthouse Press Inc., Rochester, NY Presentation by Dr. Paul Foxman. Life After Anxiety; How to replace Fear and Worry With Positive Alternatives. (2012). Community Program Innovations Inc.