‘Feeling’ in control (rather than being in control) Juliette Foenander Welcome ‘Feeling’ in control (rather than being in control) Juliette Foenander

“this is a safe place to talk about hard things” Dr phil mcgraw “this is a safe place to talk about hard things”

Feeling in control Teachers are in a unique position to provide a ‘safe place’, an environment that helps children to make vital connections needed for healthy emotional growth. the ‘safe place’..what does it look like? How does it feel? As teachers, it is important that we are in touch with our emotions so that we are emotionally intelligent for our students, therefore providing the safe place at school.

Feeling in control Emotional intelligence is about connecting emotionally The Key word is ‘connecting’ Connection to self – in touch with our emotions connection to self allows it in and with another connection to others – people, surrounds, environment

Feeling in control when we feel in control OF OUR EMOTIONS, we are a model of self-control for students MODELLing TO them what emotional intelligence is. The tricky child/situation we can ask: - what is going on for you at the moment? - how are you feeling? - what is happening/has happened to make you feel this way?

Feeling in control Neurologically, neurAL connections in the brain rapidly develop in the early years through positive and engaging experiences. (700 PER SECOND IN FIRST 3 YRS) “childhood and adolescence are critical for setting down the essential emotional habits that will govern our lives – the emotional lessons we learn as children at home and at school shape the emotional circuits, making us more adept or inept at the basics of emotional intelligence” (Goleman, d. 1996). strong connections give a greater sense of security and safety to express emotions and take personal and academic risks. A happy, proud child will treat others accordingly and apply the modelling they have seen and received.

Give encouragement The word ‘courage’ comes from cour/Coeur meaning ‘heart’ WHEN WE FEEL ENCOURAGED, WE FEEL CONNECTED (POSITIVE EMOTIONS/INTRINSIC MOTIVATION) WHEN WE FEEL DISCOURAGED, WE FEEL DISCONNECTED (NEGATIVE EMOTIONS/EXTRINSIC MOTIVATION).

encouragement Encouragement builds self-esteem, children feel good about themselves, connect emotionally, build neural connections

How? At the start of each day, ask How am I feeling? Take a deep breath. Interestingly the breath helps neuron connections. What stress/pressures do I have? How am I feeling about them? Name the emotions. Shared class /call the roll..”how are you feeling today?” reflect on emotions and how they were dealt with, encouraging the effort taken to get there. Faces of emotion – write down how many emotions you recognise. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3gnF6pZP9Lk

‘Feel’ in control The safe place is like a support system, the structure in place to “allow” a classroom environment conducive to best learning. We know that children do well when they feel good about themselves. We all do.