And the roots of violence POWER Focus today is HEALTHY relationships and violence prevention It is a given that healthy relationships are free from violence But we might not have had the opportunity to talk about WHY violence happens It is not enough to just say to people “DON”T BE VIOLENT” It doesn’t work So we will start the day by looking deeper into HOW and WHY violence happens, what behaviours or words count as violent, and how we can recognize violence in our own relationships   And the roots of violence

Violence Power Over & Control Using children and loved ones Coercion & Threats Minimizing, Denying, Blaming Intimidation Power Over & Control Power over & Control Unhealthy relationships are often characterized by violence = People used to put violence at the centre of these diagrams – however violence is the result of other factors – violence occurs because of power imbalances and controlling others What this means is that violence is a symptom of a bigger issue People who enact violence on others are asserting their control and exerting power These are some of the violent ways that power and control are used: Coercion & Threats, Intimidation, Emotional abuse, Isolation, Financial abuse, Minimizing, denying or blaming others, Using children or loved ones against another person Sue will talk more about these forms of violence in the second workshop Ties that Bind DOES ANYONE HAVE ANY QUESTIONS ABOUT THIS? BUT not all POWER is bad – there are different types of power Financial Abuse Isolation

Different types of POWER Power Over Power With Power To Power Within Discrimination Oppression Coercion Collaboration Solidarity Shape your life Create opportunities Imagine Self-worth Self-knowledge There are different types of power and they have different effects and consequences. At the centre of our violence wheel is POWER OVER – the results of this type of power are violent – they include lots of different things including discrimination, oppression, coercion, abuse Power OVER diminishes people’s other forms of power

What are some of the ways we can get POWER? When do we feel EMPOWERED Sources of Power What are some of the ways we can get POWER? When do we feel EMPOWERED When do we feel DISEMPOWERED? Sources of Power: Control Money/wealth Position Knowledge/info Force/might Abuse of others Ability to inspire fear or joy Humour Solidarity/togetherness Promoting justice Planning/organization actions Personal experiences Commitment/dedication Numbers- being the majority When do we feel empowered? When we overcome something When we are recognized for something positive When we find good solution Doing something on our own Doing something really well Caring for someone, or empowering others Joining a group that shares my interests/ideas When do we feel disempowered? Being disrespected/put down Being ignored Being stereotyped Being denied opportunity Being isolated Not having any control Feeling shame Feeling ignorant

Non-violence Healthy Equality Safety & Comfort RESPECT Sharing Responsibility Equality Honesty & Accountability Consent & Communication Think before you post Knowing about the different types of power can help us understand how violence happens in relationships, but also how we can prevent violence Preventing violence begins with equality At the root of healthy relationships is not power over and control, but EQUALITY Fostering another persons sense of power Equality means that there is a balance of power In equal relationships there is: Safety and Comfort Honesty and Accountability Respect for each other including our ideas, bodies, beliefs, possessions Trust and Support Financial partnerships Sharing responsibilities Negotiation and Fairness Consent and Communication Financial Partnership Trust & Support Healthy

Equality+Power in Relationships Power Over Power With Power To Power Within Discrimination Oppression Coercion Collaboration Solidarity Shape your life Create opportunities Imagine Self-worth Self-knowledge There is power in healthy, equal relationships – they are the power with, power to and power within Sculpture activity – find a partner One person closes their eyes – which give the other person considerable power – but we are going to utilize power WITH to create freeze-frames The open-eyed person is going to put their partner in pose that illustrates power WITH, TO or WITHIN The open-eyed partner should ask if it is ok to touch and move their partners body while their eyes are closed – if not, then verbally direct them on what you would like them to do. BUT DO NOT TELL THEM WHAT KIND OF POWER you want to illustrate Pick on type of power and create a human sculpture that illustrates that power. Then the statues should open their eyes, but keep their pose and talk about what kind of power they think they are and why

POWER STATUES Find a partner – one person is the sculptor, one is the statue Sculptors should ask for their statue’s consent to touch them, or verbally direct them into a pose SCULPTORS – secretly pick one type of power [POWER WITH, POWER TO, POWER WITHIN] Create a statue pose that represents it STATUES – move into the pose as directed (as long as you are comfortable and consenting) Try to guess what kind of power you are Discuss!