Developing Empathy in Children «Family Development Resources, Inc.»

What is Empathy? Empathy is the ability for one person to perceive the emotions, needs, and desires of another person. It is the ability of one person to be in the shoes of another person and feel what that is like. As it relates to nurturing parenting, empathy is the ability to perceive the emotions, needs and desires of a child; and to be able to respond in a nurturing way, keeping the positive welfare of the child the focus. Empathy, simply, is the ability to care.

Three Components of Empathy in Nurturing Parenting The way parents discipline their children. The way children are treated shapes the way children will respond to others in distress. The way parents respond to the emotions of a child. Empathetic responses honor the feelings and let the child know their feelings are accepted. Ability of parents to be aware of child’s needs. Parents should help children get their needs met.

Violence like hitting, shaking, spanking, and verbal abuse are not acts of empathy.

Meeting Our Own Needs and the Needs of Our Children Needs: The basic elements of human beings and all forms of life that dictate and influence behavior. Behavior: Observable responses to specific situations.

Meeting Our Own Needs and the Needs of Our Children Needs can be thought of in six general categories- we have different needs at different times, but they fall into one of the six categories. Social Physical Intellectual Creative Emotional Spiritual

The need for friendship and companionship. Social The need for friendship and companionship.

Physical The need for food, sleep, exercise, sex, air, and water

Intellectual The need for stimulation of new ideas or thoughts.

Creative The need to express one’s inner self. Creative needs are expressed in areas like a person’s appearance, dress, dance, poetry, and cooking.

Emotional The need for love, praise, security, trust, and other basic emotions.

Spiritual The need for belonging and membership. The need to believe in the power of goodness. Membership in a family is a spiritual experience.

Interdependence Behavior Needs

Meeting Our Needs and the Needs of Our Children All behavior is purposeful. If needs go unmet it can influence our behavior Children whose needs are routinely unmet suffer the effects throughout their life.

Spoiled Child One who constantly demands, whines, shows unreasonableness, hoards things, is clingy and generally is a pain to be with. Spoiled children develop as a result of the inability to trust their environment; inconsistent wishy-washy expectations from parents; and a lack of structure.

Overly Dependent Children One who has been smothered with love Parents do everything for them and their incompetence in getting their own needs met forces their dependence on others.

Aggressive Child Has to fend for his/her self Often lacks warmth; generally has received harshness and aggression from parent interactions

Empathy is the fuel for this Journey. Developing empathy Empathy is not only the ability of a parent to be aware of the child’s needs, but also to help children get their needs met appropriately. If parents provide proper care, then children will grow up trusting others and their ability to get their own needs met. Children go from a natural state of dependency to a state of gradual independency. Empathy is the fuel for this Journey.

Empathy is the cornerstone of nurturing parenting. Nurture Yourselves!!!  The ability to being aware of someone else’s needs is being aware and meeting your own needs. Getting your own needs met is the best way to nurture yourself. Empathy is the cornerstone of nurturing parenting.