Hankham Healthy Minds Project Dr Daniella Alexandra Educational Psychologist East Sussex Educational Psychology Service

How we can support the well-being of our children

Triune Brain Theory

Supporting our children in recognising, labelling and talking about their emotions Using pictures Developing their vocabulary Talking about feelings of characters TV, film, books Talking about your own feelings Modelling

Developing self-awareness ‘Name it to tame it’ Not being able to name, recognise our emotions can be frightening, confusing. Renders us at the mercy of our feelings Verbalising our emotions makes our feelings less intense, help them feel manageable SURVIVAL SAFETY

Using Emotion Coaching to emotional development (John Gottman, 1996) Research has shown that ‘emotion-focused talk’ by the adult can teach children to use appropriate strategies to cope with stress – building the architecture of their brains. (Bowlby, 1998, Schore, 1994) Helping children to become aware of their emotions

Benefits of emotion coaching Evidence based intervention Offers young people strategies to deal with their emotions and social contexts Accepting distress and ‘negative’ emotions as normal Using moments of negative behaviour as opportunities for teaching Supporting emotional development

Step 1 - Empathise, validate and label Look for physical and verbal signs of emotion being felt. Use words to reflect back to the young person and help them label the emotion Affirm and empathise, allowing young person to calm down through co-regulation Provide a narrative for emotional experience

Step 2 – Setting limits Boundary the behaviour not the emotion State the boundary limits of acceptable behaviour.

Step 3 – Problem solve with the child Explore the feelings that gave rise to the behaviour. Scaffold alternative ideas and actions that could lead to more appropriate and productive outcomes. Empower the young person to believe that they can overcome difficulties and manage their own feelings and behaviour.

Regular use of calming strategies

Our mind is like a house with different rooms Our mind is like a house with different rooms. With practice we can choose which room we want to be in. Past Angry Present Calm Future

Mindfulness Practising focusing your attention Focusing on present Quietening the mind Training the mind to focus on what you want to

Mindful activities Mindful walking Focusing on particular senses What can you see/hear/feel right now? What colours can you see?

Learning to relax and self-soothe takes practice

Summary Helping our children recognise, label and talk about their emotions Emotion coaching – 3 steps Relaxation techniques Explain that we need to ensure that support is embedded within a plan do review cycle.

Thank you for listening