CONFLICT SPONGE: Have you ever had to solve a personal problem or a problem for someone else? How did you go about solving it? What was the hardest part?

What is Conflict? Definition – The perception of two or more objectives, choices or courses of action which motivates people to resolve the situation. As humans we prefer a state of balance – a consistency within ourselves, our beliefs, our attitudes and our view of the world. Just as we seek to maintain or restore this balance, we seek to avoid or eliminate imbalance (conflict)

7 TYPES OF CONFLICT: CONTENT CONFLICT – Conflicts which arise over perceived differences in facts or information. Example: If you and I are in a conflict over who won the Super Bowl in a given year, we are experiencing a “content” conflict.

Continued: DECISIONAL CONFLICT– Conflicts which revolve around decisions that an individual or individuals must face. Sometimes these decisions involve ourselves and can therefore be classified as intrapersonal.. Example: A decision over which car to buy can confront an individual with equally attractive alternatives.

Continued: MATERIAL CONFLICT– Conflicts are exclusively interpersonal and involve competition for a limited resource, such as money, a job, property, food or any other limited resource. The more of a limited resource which one person gets, the less there is for someone else. Example: People often find themselves competing for things which are actually not in limited supply. Conflicts over love or esteem are example of this misinterpretation.

Continued: ROLE CONFLICT– This involves disagreements in role expectations between two people or conflicting role expectation in the case of intrapersonal role conflict. Example: Conflicts between couples over their expectations of one another’s behavior.

Continued: JUDGMENTAL CONFLICT– Judgmental conflicts revolve around conflict of value statements as to the worth of something. Example: Conflicts about whether or not a particular movie, book or political candidate is good or bad.

Continued: EXPECTANCY CONFLICT– It is a natural part of living to make expectations about people and situations but if these expectations are unrealistic, the “reality” can never measure up and we doom ourselves to increasing amounts of dissatisfaction with life. Example:

Continued: EGO CONFLICT– In this type of conflict, the competition is over which person is the better person. Once our ego defense mechanisms come into play, good communication goes out the window and people begin attacking each other. Example:

The Importance To Managing Conflict: Conflict Doesn’t Go Away You can pretend all you want but until it is resolved it will be there. Unresolved Conflict Can lead to problems and lead to other conflict – becomes a vicious circle. Conflict Is Inevitable We are confronted at home, work and play with a limited amount of resources such as money, time, space and availability of people. We have differences with other peoples values and interests. Conflict Can Be Beneficial The skills that are necessary for creative thinking are derived from the ability to mange controversy. Knowing that its not good to avoid conflict can improve our relationships.

Barriers To Conflict Management: In order to manage conflicts productively we must recognize and overcome these barriers. AVOIDANCE – This is where people want to avoid dealing with their conflicts/problems. NONASSERTVIENESS – Not being able to speak your mind or let others speak their mind can cause more frustration and distorts communication. MISANALYSIS – Buying into someone else’s problems or failing to think about the actual conflict can cause inappropriate behavior.

Barriers Continued: ESCALATION – Becoming defensive and thereby escalating the situation to an ego conflict can cause disasters. DIRTY FIGHTING – Using strategies associated with nonassertive or aggressive behavior promotes poor communication and leads to escalation. COMPETING – Need to cooperate and work together . Don’t look for a win-lose solution, need to seek a win-win solution.

ACTIVITY: IDENTIFY CONFLICTS Hand out worksheet Take 10-15 minutes to fill in each statement with the answer (conflict) that best fits. Write down 2 personal examples that you might have thought of when you were reading through these scenarios at the bottom of the worksheet Partner up and compare answers and share your personal examples. Go over handout as a class.