Conflict Resolution in Leadership NCCCS Student Leadership Development Program Thursday, June 8, 2017 Lisa D. Inman

Presentation Overview Defining Conflict Resolution (including 4-Word-Build Activity) Identifying Conflict in Your Own Experiences (including Conflict Sheet Exercise) Understanding Conflict Keys to Resolving Conflict (including Outcomes Identification Exercises) Conflict Styles

What is Conflict Resolution? Defining It and Identifying Its Presence

Defining Conflict competitive or opposing action of incompatibles antagonistic state or action (as of divergent ideas, interests, or persons) mental struggle resulting from incompatible or opposing needs, drives, wishes, or external or internal demands  the opposition of persons or forces that gives rise to the dramatic action in a drama or fiction  www.merriam-webster.com

Defining Resolution the act of answering, solving [finding a solution, explanation, or answer for] the act of determining  something that is resolved [dealt with successfully] a formal expression of opinion, will, or intent voted by an official body or assembled group www.merriam-webster.com

4-Word-Build Individually, write down 4 words related to “conflict” Individually, write down 4 words related to “resolution” Break into 5 small groups of 5 leaders and 1 small group of 6 leaders Share individual lists of 4 words with small group Narrow down list of words to 4 for entire small group  Return to large group Combine 6 lists of 4 words and narrow down to a total of 4 words for entire group* Exercise borrowed and adapted from www.communicationandconflict.com

Identifying Conflicts in Your Experience Large group sharing Conflict Sheet Exercise Break into 10 small groups Fill out “Conflict Sheet” Pick out 1 conflict to share with group Provide feedback/input for others’ conflicts

Will I Have to Handle Conflict? Understanding Conflict and Keys to Resolving It

Understanding Conflict Conflict is normal and healthy (if managed appropriately) Conflict arises from differences Conflict will happen, in personal, academic, and professional experiences Conflict can either stimulate or hinder progress, growth, and productivity Conflict that is mismanaged can derail leaders and limit their efficacy Conflict can not and should not be avoided forever We all have ways in which we prefer to handle or resolve conflict

Keys to Resolving Conflict Keep your emotions and stress in check Focus on words, not actions, in understanding the conflict Listen carefully to what is said/expressed, but remain aware of non-verbals Ensure that everyone is being specific Be aware of assumptions that may impact the conflict Know your people/the parties involved

Keys to Resolving Conflict (continued) Be mindful of relational needs (e.g. a need to feel respected and valued) Clarify the real issues and deal with each issue individually Restate what you have heard/understood about the conflict Avoid feeling obligated to resolve conflict in the moment Validate the concerns and perspectives of all involved parties

Outcomes Identification Exercise Brainstorm a list of responses to “What outcomes do I desire from my leadership experiences?” Pick 1 outcome to share with the group Identify characteristics of each outcome (procedural vs. psychological needs) Finish this statement: “One desired outcome I am working to achieve is ____________. This is very important to our group because __________.”

Do I Really Have to Do THAT ? Conflict Resolution Styles

Five (5) Common Styles Competing: “I win, you lose.” Collaborating: “We both win.” Compromising: “Neither of us wins.” Avoiding: “Nobody wins.” Accommodating: “I lose, you win.” Based on 1970s research of Kenneth Thomas and Ralph Kilmann

Understanding Each Style When to use When not to use Sign that you may be overusing it In what types of situations might each style be best suited?

Any Questions? Remember that Learning to Manage and Resolve Conflict is an Ongoing Process