1 Corinthians 7 Marriage, Sex, & Divorce

God

1 Corinthians 7 1 Now for the matters you wrote about: It is okay for a man not to marry. 2 But to avoid immorality, each man should have his own wife, and each woman her own husband.

1 Corinthians 7 Good to be single 1 Now for the matters you wrote about: It is okay for a man not to marry. 2 But to avoid immorality, each man should have his own wife, and each woman her own husband. Good to be single

1 Corinthians 7 Good to be single Good to be married 1 Now for the matters you wrote about: It is okay for a man not to marry. 2 But to avoid immorality, each man should have his own wife, and each woman her own husband. Good to be single Good to be married

? 1 Corinthians 7 Good to be single Good to be married 1 Now for the matters you wrote about: It is okay for a man not to marry. 2 But to avoid immorality, each man should have his own wife, and each woman her own husband. Good to be single Good to be married

? 1 Corinthians 7 Good to be single Good to be married 1 Now for the matters you wrote about: It is okay for a man not to marry. 2 But to avoid immorality, each man should have his own wife, and each woman her own husband. Good to be single Good to be married

1 Corinthians 7 3 Let the husband fulfill his duty to his wife, and likewise also the wife to her husband. 4 The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does; and likewise also the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does.

1 Corinthians 7 Amazing self sacrifice 3 Let the husband fulfill his duty to his wife, and likewise also the wife to her husband. 4 The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does; and likewise also the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. Amazing self sacrifice

1 Corinthians 7 Amazing self sacrifice Amazing anti-sexism 3 Let the husband fulfill his duty to his wife, and likewise also the wife to her husband. 4 The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does; and likewise also the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. Amazing self sacrifice Amazing anti-sexism

1 Corinthians 7 5 Do not deprive each other except by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. 6 I say this as a concession, not as a command.

1 Corinthians 7 7 I wish that all men were as I am. But each man has his own gift from God; one has this gift, another has that.

1 Corinthians 7 Paul was a celibate 7 I wish that all men were as I am. But each man has his own gift from God; one has this gift, another has that. Paul was a celibate

1 Corinthians 7 Paul was a celibate 7 I wish that all men were as I am. But each man has his own gift from God; one has this gift, another has that. Paul was a celibate There is a gift of celibacy, and a gift of marriage

1 Corinthians 7 Why does he favor celibacy in this passage? 7 I wish that all men were as I am. But each man has his own gift from God; one has this gift, another has that. Why does he favor celibacy in this passage?

1 Corinthians 7 Why does he favor celibacy in this passage? 26 I think then that this is good in view of the present distress, that it is good for a man to remain as he is. 7 I wish that all men were as I am. But each man has his own gift from God; one has this gift, another has that. Why does he favor celibacy in this passage?

1 Corinthians 7 Why does he favor celibacy in this passage? 26 I think then that this is good in view of the present distress, that it is good for a man to remain as he is. 27 Are you bound to a wife? Do not seek to be released. Are you released from a wife? Do not seek a wife. 7 I wish that all men were as I am. But each man has his own gift from God; one has this gift, another has that. Why does he favor celibacy in this passage?

1 Corinthians 7 Why does he favor celibacy in this passage? 26 I think then that this is good in view of the present distress, that it is good for a man to remain as he is. 27 Are you bound to a wife? Do not seek to be released. Are you released from a wife? Do not seek a wife. 28 But if you should marry, you have not sinned; and if a virgin should marry, she has not sinned. Yet such will have trouble in this life, and I am trying to spare you. 7 I wish that all men were as I am. But each man has his own gift from God; one has this gift, another has that. Why does he favor celibacy in this passage?

1 Corinthians 7 8 Now to the unmarried and the widows I say: It is okay for them to stay unmarried, as I am. 9 But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.

1 Corinthians 7 Marriage is God’s provision for sex 8 Now to the unmarried and the widows I say: It is okay for them to stay unmarried, as I am. 9 But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion. Marriage is God’s provision for sex

1 Corinthians 7 10 To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife should not separate from her husband. 11 But if she does, she should remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband should not divorce his wife.

1 Corinthians 7 Means a direct quote 10 To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife should not separate from her husband. 11 But if she does, she should remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband should not divorce his wife. Means a direct quote

1 Corinthians 7 Some think this refers to separation, not divorce 10 To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife should not separate from her husband. 11 But if she does, she should remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband should not divorce his wife. Some think this refers to separation, not divorce

1 Corinthians 7 Some think this refers to separation, not divorce 26 I think then that this is good in view of the present distress, that it is good for a man to remain as he is. 27 Are you bound to a wife? Do not seek to be released. Are you released from a wife? Do not seek a wife. 28 But if you should marry, you have not sinned; and if a virgin should marry, she has not sinned. Yet such will have trouble in this life, and I am trying to spare you. 10 To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife should not separate from her husband. 11 But if she does, she should remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband should not divorce his wife. Some think this refers to separation, not divorce

1 Corinthians 7 Some think this refers to separation, not divorce 26 I think then that this is good in view of the present distress, that it is good for a man to remain as he is. 27 Are you bound to a wife? Do not seek to be released. Are you released from a wife? Do not seek a wife. 28 But if you should marry, you have not sinned; and if a virgin should marry, she has not sinned. Yet such will have trouble in this life, and I am trying to spare you. 10 To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife should not separate from her husband. 11 But if she does, she should remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband should not divorce his wife. Some think this refers to separation, not divorce

1 Corinthians 7 Some think this refers to separation, not divorce 26 I think then that this is good in view of the present distress, that it is good for a man to remain as he is. 27 Are you bound to a wife? Do not seek to be released. Are you released from a wife? Do not seek a wife. 28 But if you should marry, you have not sinned; and if a virgin should marry, she has not sinned. Yet such will have trouble in this life, and I am trying to spare you. 10 To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife should not separate from her husband. 11 But if she does, she should remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband should not divorce his wife. Some think this refers to separation, not divorce

1 Corinthians 7 12 To the rest I say this (I, not the Lord): If any brother has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to live with him, he should not divorce her. 13 And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to live with her, she should not divorce him.

1 Corinthians 7 14 For the unbelieving husband has been set apart through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been set apart through her believing husband. Otherwise your children would be [like other kids], but as it is, they are set apart.

1 Corinthians 7 15 But if the unbeliever leaves, let him do so. A believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace. 16 How do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or, how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife?

1 Corinthians 7 15 But if the unbeliever leaves, let him do so. A believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace. 16 How do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or, how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife? To be set apart is not a guarantee they will come to know the Lord

1 Corinthians 7 Several points clear: 15 But if the unbeliever leaves, let him do so. A believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace. 16 How do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or, how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife? Several points clear:

1 Corinthians 7 Several points clear: 1 Divorce is bad 15 But if the unbeliever leaves, let him do so. A believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace. 16 How do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or, how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife? Several points clear: 1 Divorce is bad

1 Corinthians 7 Several points clear: 1 Divorce is bad 15 But if the unbeliever leaves, let him do so. A believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace. 16 How do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or, how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife? Several points clear: 1 Divorce is bad - breaking a promise

1 Corinthians 7 Several points clear: 1 Divorce is bad 15 But if the unbeliever leaves, let him do so. A believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace. 16 How do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or, how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife? Several points clear: 1 Divorce is bad - breaking a promise - breaking a picture

1 Corinthians 7 Several points clear: 1 Divorce is bad 15 But if the unbeliever leaves, let him do so. A believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace. 16 How do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or, how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife? Several points clear: 1 Divorce is bad - breaking a promise - breaking a picture - harmful to children

Children of Divorce at Risk: Substance abuse Study of 174 children in 91 families 1992 “The incidence of substance abuse in offspring was associated with parental divorce.” Children of divorce had “seven times the risk for developing substance abuse disorder” Columbia Univ. & NY Psych. Institute. Myrna Weissman et. al, “Incidence of Psychiatric Disorder in Offspring at High and Low Risk for Depression,” JAACAP #31 [1992]: 640-648

Children of Divorce at Risk: Self Concept Canadian study of 150 undergrad students Compared to children of single parent families, children of intact families: hold a more “robust over-all academic self-concept” had stronger “social self-concept” had better relationships with same sex, opposite sex, and parents had more favorable “emotional self-concept” Rashmi Garg, “Academic and non-Academic Self-Concepts: Influence of Recent Life-Change Experiences and Demographic Social, and Health Variables,” Psychological Reports 70 [1991]: 781-882

Children of Divorce at Risk: Overall Adjustment A longitudinal study for the Society for Research in Child Development 1992 Compared to children of divorce, children of intact families were: “consistently more scholastically and socially competent” “more socially responsible” “demonstrated fewer behavior problems” differences still evident 4-6 years after the divorce remarriage is no help Mavis Hetherington et.al “Coping with Marital Transitions: A Family Systems Perspective” Monographs of the Society for Research in Child Development 57 [1992]: # 227

Children of Divorce at Risk: Parental Relations Research summary by B. Melnyk, University of Rochester Things children of divorce usually experience: Most fathers become less nurturing with time Grieving for the lost full-time parent is often intense Mother-child bond also usually deteriorates “practical problems...leave mothers physically and emotionally unavailable” parenting styles change to reflect extremes: authoritarian or permissive Bernadette Melnyk, “Changes in Parent-Child Relationships Following Divorce,” Pediatric Nursing, 17 [1991]: 337-341

Children of Divorce at Risk: Socioeconomic Attainment A longitudinal study by U. of Nebraska “Those who experienced parental absence, compared to those who did not: - achieved less education - earned less per year ($4000) - attained lower occupational status

Children of Divorce at Risk: Socioeconomic Attainment “Only a modest proportion” of the difference could be attributed to economic factors. . . Attainment was measurably better if the absent parent had died than if he/she was absent because of divorce. “Our results suggest that some additional factor, other than economic hardship, is responsible for the lowered attainment of children from single-parent families.” Amato and Keith, “Separation From a Parent During Childhood and Adult Socioeconomic Attainment,” Social Forces 70[1991]: 187-206

Children of Divorce at Risk: Adult Depression A longitudinal statistical study at the University of Nebraska Established a link between parental absence-through illegitimacy, divorce, death, or other reasons-and subsequent depression “Family disruption during childhood has long-term consequences for the subjective well-being of both women and men.” Paul R. Amato, “Parental Absence During Childhood and Depression in Later Life,” The Sociological Quarterly 32 [1991]: 543-556

1 Corinthians 7 Several points clear: 1 Divorce is bad 15 But if the unbeliever leaves, let him do so. A believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace. 16 How do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or, how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife? Several points clear: 1 Divorce is bad - breaking a promise - breaking a picture - harmful to children

1 Corinthians 7 Several points clear: 1 Divorce is bad 15 But if the unbeliever leaves, let him do so. A believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace. 16 How do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or, how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife? Several points clear: 1 Divorce is bad 2 Divorce may be a lesser evil

1 Corinthians 7 15 But if the unbeliever leaves, let him do so. A believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace. 16 How do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or, how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife?

1 Corinthians 7 10 To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife must not separate from her husband. 11 But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife.

1 Corinthians 7 10 To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife must not separate from her husband. 11 But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife.

1 Corinthians 7 Several points clear: 1 Divorce is bad 10 To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife must not separate from her husband. 11 But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife. Several points clear: 1 Divorce is bad 2 Divorce may be a lesser evil

1 Corinthians 7 Several points clear: 1 Divorce is bad 10 To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife must not separate from her husband. 11 But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife. Several points clear: 1 Divorce is bad 2 Divorce may be a lesser evil 3 Usually solves nothing

U.S. Department of Health, Education and Welfare; Public Health Service, National Center for Health Statistics: “One of the most clear-cut findings… is the high likelihood of divorce for persons who have been married more than once.”

“the average duration of marriage before divorce is only half as long for the second marriage and one-third as long for third marriages.” Duration of Marriage Before Divorce: United States, (Hyattsville, MD.: U.S. Department of Health and Human Services: Public Health Service, Office of Health Research, Statistics, and Technology, National Center for Health Statistics, 1981) p. 12ff

1 Corinthians 7 Several points clear: 1 Divorce is bad 10 To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife must not separate from her husband. 11 But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife. Several points clear: 1 Divorce is bad 2 Divorce may be a lesser evil 3 Usually solves nothing

A deeper, fundamental problem: We believe changing our circumstances will “fix” our lives

1 Corinthians 7 17 Nevertheless, each one should retain the place in life that the Lord assigned to him and to which God has called him. This is the rule I lay down in all the churches.

1 Corinthians 7 17 Nevertheless, each one should retain the place in life that the Lord assigned to him and to which God has called him. This is the rule I lay down in all the churches. Assumes:

1 Corinthians 7 17 Nevertheless, each one should retain the place in life that the Lord assigned to him and to which God has called him. This is the rule I lay down in all the churches. Assumes: God is sovereign

1 Corinthians 7 17 Nevertheless, each one should retain the place in life that the Lord assigned to him and to which God has called him. This is the rule I lay down in all the churches. Assumes: God is sovereign God knows you personally and exactly

1 Corinthians 7 17 Nevertheless, each one should retain the place in life that the Lord assigned to him and to which God has called him. This is the rule I lay down in all the churches. Assumes: God is sovereign God knows you personally and exactly God has a plan for you

1 Corinthians 7 18 Was a man already circumcised when he was called? He should not become uncircumcised. Was a man uncircumcised when he was called? He should not be circumcised.

1 Corinthians 7 19 Circumcision is nothing and uncircumcision is nothing. Keeping God's commands is what counts. 20 Each one should remain in the situation which he was in when God called him.

1 Corinthians 7 21 Were you a slave when you were called? Don't let it trouble you--

1 Corinthians 7 21 Were you a slave when you were called? Don't let it trouble you--although if you can gain your freedom, do so.

1 Corinthians 7 21 Were you a slave when you were called? Don't let it trouble you--although if you can gain your freedom, do so. 22 For he who was a slave when he was called by the Lord is the Lord's freedman; similarly, he who was a free man when he was called is Christ's slave. 23 You were bought at a price; do not become slaves of men.

1 Corinthians 7 This is not legalistic thinking! 21 Were you a slave when you were called? Don't let it trouble you--although if you can gain your freedom, do so. 22 For he who was a slave when he was called by the Lord is the Lord's freedman; similarly, he who was a free man when he was called is Christ's slave. 23 You were bought at a price; do not become slaves of men. This is not legalistic thinking!

1 Corinthians 7 This is not legalistic thinking! 21 Were you a slave when you were called? Don't let it trouble you--although if you can gain your freedom, do so. 22 For he who was a slave when he was called by the Lord is the Lord's freedman; similarly, he who was a free man when he was called is Christ's slave. 23 You were bought at a price; do not become slaves of men. This is not legalistic thinking! Remaining as you are = not a law, but a values principle

1 Corinthians 7 This is not legalistic thinking! Frequent desire to change our circumstances reflects a refusal to see that most of our problems come from within 21 Were you a slave when you were called? Don't let it trouble you--although if you can gain your freedom, do so. 22 For he who was a slave when he was called by the Lord is the Lord's freedman; similarly, he who was a free man when he was called is Christ's slave. 23 You were bought at a price; do not become slaves of men. This is not legalistic thinking! Remaining as you are = not a law, but a values principle

1 Corinthians 7 This is not legalistic thinking! Frequent desire to change our circumstances reflects a refusal to see that most of our problems come from within Often our motives for changing our circumstances have nothing to do with God 21 Were you a slave when you were called? Don't let it trouble you--although if you can gain your freedom, do so. 22 For he who was a slave when he was called by the Lord is the Lord's freedman; similarly, he who was a free man when he was called is Christ's slave. 23 You were bought at a price; do not become slaves of men. This is not legalistic thinking! Remaining as you are = not a law, but a values principle

1 Corinthians 7 This is not legalistic thinking! Frequent desire to change our circumstances reflects a refusal to see that most of our problems come from within Often our motives for changing our circumstances have nothing to do with God - making more money 21 Were you a slave when you were called? Don't let it trouble you--although if you can gain your freedom, do so. 22 For he who was a slave when he was called by the Lord is the Lord's freedman; similarly, he who was a free man when he was called is Christ's slave. 23 You were bought at a price; do not become slaves of men. This is not legalistic thinking! Remaining as you are = not a law, but a values principle

1 Corinthians 7 This is not legalistic thinking! Frequent desire to change our circumstances reflects a refusal to see that most of our problems come from within Often our motives for changing our circumstances have nothing to do with God - making more money - avoiding problems 21 Were you a slave when you were called? Don't let it trouble you--although if you can gain your freedom, do so. 22 For he who was a slave when he was called by the Lord is the Lord's freedman; similarly, he who was a free man when he was called is Christ's slave. 23 You were bought at a price; do not become slaves of men. This is not legalistic thinking! Remaining as you are = not a law, but a values principle

1 Corinthians 7 This is not legalistic thinking! Frequent desire to change our circumstances reflects a refusal to see that most of our problems come from within Often our motives for changing our circumstances have nothing to do with God - making more money - avoiding problems - sexual lust 21 Were you a slave when you were called? Don't let it trouble you--although if you can gain your freedom, do so. 22 For he who was a slave when he was called by the Lord is the Lord's freedman; similarly, he who was a free man when he was called is Christ's slave. 23 You were bought at a price; do not become slaves of men. This is not legalistic thinking! Remaining as you are = not a law, but a values principle

1 Corinthians 7 This is not legalistic thinking! Frequent desire to change our circumstances reflects a refusal to see that most of our problems come from within At other times, a change in circumstances is for the better 21 Were you a slave when you were called? Don't let it trouble you--although if you can gain your freedom, do so. 22 For he who was a slave when he was called by the Lord is the Lord's freedman; similarly, he who was a free man when he was called is Christ's slave. 23 You were bought at a price; do not become slaves of men. This is not legalistic thinking! Remaining as you are = not a law, but a values principle

1 Corinthians 7 This is not legalistic thinking! Frequent desire to change our circumstances reflects a refusal to see that most of our problems come from within At other times, a change in circumstances is for the better The burden of evidence is on why we should change 21 Were you a slave when you were called? Don't let it trouble you--although if you can gain your freedom, do so. 22 For he who was a slave when he was called by the Lord is the Lord's freedman; similarly, he who was a free man when he was called is Christ's slave. 23 You were bought at a price; do not become slaves of men. This is not legalistic thinking! Remaining as you are = not a law, but a values principle

1 Corinthians 7 24 Brothers, each man, as responsible to God, should remain in the situation God called him to.

Application Don’t become a runner!

Application To the Married: Mal 2:16 “I hate divorce,” says the Lord Don’t give up! Don’t be fatalistic! Get help

Application To the Unmarried: Being single = gift from God Find out his purpose

Application To the Unmarried: Are you ready? Being single = gift from God Find out his purpose Are you ready?

Application To the Unmarried: Are you ready? Being single = gift from God Find out his purpose Are you ready? Able to be single with:

Application To the Unmarried: Are you ready? Being single = gift from God Find out his purpose Are you ready? Able to be single with: - emotional stability

Application To the Unmarried: Are you ready? Being single = gift from God Find out his purpose Are you ready? Able to be single with: - emotional stability - successful relationships

Application To the Unmarried: Are you ready? Being single = gift from God Find out his purpose Are you ready? Able to be single with: - emotional stability - successful relationships - spiritual consistency

Application To the Unmarried: Being single = gift from God Find out his purpose Don’t take matters into your own hands

Application To the Unmarried: Being single = gift from God Find out his purpose Don’t take matters into your own hands Look for a God-centered marriage

Application To the Divorced: Find out what your contribution was Don’t think affluence will save your kids Don’t fight! Draw close to a helping community

Next Time Self-giving love in a pluralistic culture

Marriage etc. Comments? Questions? Experiences?