Let’s Talk about…Sex

What is Sex? What is Sex Sex is a small word with a lot of different meanings Sex can be pleasure from genitals, brain, emotions, skin Different types of sex: Vagina/penis sex; vagina/vagina sex; penis/anus sex; oral sex... You get to decide what sex means to you Sex should start with talking about readiness, consent, comfort, interests, limits and boundaries

Why do teens have sex? Create a list with your group why teens have sex, and why teens may choose not to have sex

Why do teens have sex? Ready & want to In love Want to have a baby Feel good Keep partners Peer pressure Using drugs/alcohol Horny Gain status Rebel against authority

Why teens choose not to have sex Are too busy Don’t want to/not interested Not ready Worried about getting pregnant/STI Poor body image Not in a relationship Had a negative past experience Against their values/beliefs Partner doesn’t want to May interfere with their future goals Worried parents may find out Worried it may hurt their reputation

Before Sex Before sex happens, it is a good idea to talk about a few things With your group, create a list of things people should discuss before having sex

1. Consent Consent is another way of saying permission Before sex or even touching, you have to hear that person say that they are into it with a “yes” or “right on” Keep in mind, anyone has the right to say “no” or change their mind at anytime People cannot give consent if they are drunk or high https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lOS5_I3Yzog https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-JwlKjRaUaw

2. Limits & Boundaries People have different expectation when it comes to sex Talking about limits and boundaries before can help you know what both people are comfortable with Can also help you decide if you want to have sex with that person Examples What are people okay with when it comes to kissing, touching? Is your partner comfortable with having sex? Is your partner okay with daring other people?

Birth control Important to talk about why types of birth control you want to use to protect against pregnancy and STI’s Many different types of birth control (which we will talk about in class)

Going to get tested Talk about getting tested Get tested by seeing your doctor or at any teen clinic alone, together, or with a friend Where Can you get tested? https://www.serc.mb.ca/sexual-health/stis-and-hiv/getting-tested-manitoba Teen Clinic https://www.gov.mb.ca/healthychild/mcad/had_teenclinic_wpg.pdf

Teen clinic Things you can get at a teen clinic Free condoms Free or low cost birth control Counselling Pregnancy, STI & HIV tests Information about all birth control options Counselling to all 3 legal pregnancy options Access to a doctor or nurse for any health issues that you need totalk about or get checkout out Do not have to provide a health card or your name

What if pregnancy Happens Using birth control properly can greatly decrease your chances of getting pregnant, only abstinence (not having sex) is guaranteed to work 100% of the time Before sex it is important to talk about options Abortion, adoption, parenting

Laws around sex The age of consent for sexual activity is 16 years. They can legally consent to sexual activity Can say yes to anyone Are there exceptions? The Criminal Code provides "close in age" or "peer group" exceptions. 14-15 year olds can consent to sex with someone less than five years older than them* 12-13 can consent to sex with someone who is less than 2 years older than them* *Even at these ages, someone under 18 cannot have sex with someone in a position of authority (like a teacher, coach or babysitter). No one can get take advantage of or exploited

How do you know if you are ready for sex? Talking with your partner Understanding what each other others expectations are limits/boundaries – what you would both like to try or not try Clarifying what sex could mean in your relationship Learning about and going to get birth control & protection Figuring out what both of your values are concerning pregnancy How do you feel about abortion? Parenting if pregnancy occurs Going to get tested for an STI Both of you should feel ready in order for it to be a good experience for both people

Sex & Values Here are some guidelines for identifying what you value: Is this something that is important to you? Would you feel good if people you respect knew that this was important to you? Is this something you would stand by even if others made fun of you for it? Does this fit in with your vision of who you are?

What are my values regarding sex The following slides contain common statements thoughts and ideas surrounding teens and sex: As we read through each statement, imagine your response in the form of a stop light: Red: you disagree with the statement Yellow: you are unsure Green: you agree with the statement

Value #1 Having sex before marriage (or lifetime commitment) is wrong

Value #2 It is important for teenagers to know how to use birth control and practice safer sex (use condoms)

Value #3 My religion should play an important role in how I make decisions about sexual behavior

Value #4 The most important thing about sex is having fun

Value #5 It’s important to be in love with your partner before you have sex with him/her

Value #6 If two people are sexually attracted to each other , that’s all that is needed to have a good relationship

Value #7 There is too much pressure on teenagers to be sexually active

Value #8 There is too much pressure on teenagers not to be sexually active

Value #9 Most teenagers would be better off waiting until they are older before being sexually active

Value #10 It’s okay for teenagers to masterbate

Value #11 It’s ok for a pregnant teenager to choose to have an abortion, if that’s the best option for them

Journal Entry Which statements (if any) were hardest for you? If your parents voted on these statements would their votes be similar or different from yours? Identify one of the values you felt strongly about (whether you agreed or disagreed) and write a short paragraph about this. * if you don’t want me to read please indicate*