Avoiding “you” in writing

Why avoid using “you?” WHY: Slipping into “you” is confusing because you are switching perspectives. Instead of just talking about the literature, you are suddenly addressing the reader directly, and the reader is not part of the text about which you are writing.

HOW TO FIX IT: The fix will depend on the situation. 1.      Replace “you” with “the reader.” Do this when writing about things that the author shows. Incorrect: Lee shows you what a great father Atticus is. CORRECT: Lee shows the reader what a great father Atticus is. Incorrect: Dally’s words show you what a tough person he is. CORRECT: Dally’s words show the reader what a tough person he is.

HOW TO FIX IT: The fix will depend on the situation. 1.      Replace “you” with “one.” Do this when talking about people in general. Incorrect: Clearly, you must not judge people before knowing them. CORRECT: Clearly, one must not judge people before knowing them. Incorrect: Without education, you have little chance to succeed. CORRECT: Without education, one has little chance to succeed.

HOW TO FIX IT: The fix will depend on the situation. 1.      Cut out the “you” phrase altogether. Do this when you make the mistake of speaking directly to the reader. Incorrect: As you read this essay, you will see how baseball is like fishing. CORRECT: Baseball is like fishing. Incorrect: As you can see, the author uses both metaphors and personification to express her point. CORRECT: The author uses both metaphors and personification to express her point.

Practice: rewrite the following sentences correctly - avoid “you” I will tell you all the reasons why hockey is the best sport to watch. Rewrite:

2. You should not wear short skirts in school because it is breaking the dress code. Rewrite:

3. J. K. Rowling shows you how 3. J.K. Rowling shows you how determined Harry Potter is to find out as much as possible about his parents’ deaths. Rewrite:

Persuasive Paragraph: Your turn: Persuasive Paragraph: Rules are an important part of our society, but there are times in which it may be appropriate to break one. Write a persuasive essay (3 paragraphs) in which you explain your position on whether or not it is ever appropriate to break a school rule. Be sure to use specific examples in your response!