Reminder: Please prepare a notebook (your Charisma Journal) and bring it to this class every week. On the notebook you will write down your notes and answers to questions/quizzes in class. Please write down the following Statement of Passion on your notebook: By signing on this statement, I understand that I will do my best to attend all the classes and complete all the quiz/homework/project requirements. With my passion for life I believe I can do it. This statement of passion with your signature will worth 15% toward your overall grade. Students who are absent for 3 times or more will fail this course. Being late (for more than 5 minutes) twice is the same as absence. Please start to form a group with 6 to 8 people and elect a group leader. You will work on the midterm presentation with your group members. Please download course notes and upload homework through NCKU moodle.

Maximize Confidence 1

Review the definition of being successful: Audacity to dream; ability to take actions to make dreams come true; self-adjustment for goal reaching or serendipity; creation of value for other people in the process. Factors leading to success: methods, observation, resources, attitude, and luck. (MORAL) There is no absolutely correct answer! Your choice of the factors are also right!

High self-confidence: the foundation of producing miracles and life-long success. Following the right steps to gain self-confidence is just like following some universal laws (e.g., gravity). Without a correct direction, simply hard work will not lead you to your goal. Example: dialing a phone number; magic tricks. Four stages of learning: not knowing your incompetence; knowing your incompetence; knowing your competence; not knowing (or not noticing) your competence

The most important belief in building self confidence: I am 100% responsible for whatever I experience in my life. (I am in control of my own life.) E (events) + R (response) = O (outcome, or experience and results) Can other people make you feel bad, or do you choose to feel bad? We are educated to react to certain things in a certain way. But is it the only way? Example: In the relationship with your significant other, have you thought of changing something about him/her? After leaving the class today, would it be possible to feel totally connected with people? Would it also be possible to feel totally lonely? Practice: Please start to talk to some people in the class and find your group members.

In the formula E + R = O, R can also mean risk In the formula E + R = O, R can also mean risk. This is because if you want a different outcome, you must take risks to change your response. In asking someone out, there is nothing to lose. Restaurant example. All growths require changes, and all changes induce discomfort. Will you let some small comfort stop you from moving forward? Get out of your comfort zone! The biggest mistake: over-generalization. Incapability in one field does not mean incapability in other fields. Practice of focus: List 3 things about you that are better than Mr. Jay Chow or Miss Chih-ling Lin. From now on, focus more on what you have, not what you don’t have.

Self-confidence can be built up through relationship Self-confidence can be built up through relationship. If you do not feel lovable and capable through interacting with your family or people around you, now it is time to build up this kind of feeling. Having a group of people who can support you or a place where you belong will help increase your self-esteem. Story of unwilling to go to school. Find (or even create) places in your life; so that when you go in there, the world brightens up, for you and also for people in that place. Practice: Introduce yourself in front of the whole class.

Practice of mutual trust: Walk around the classroom and face with 10 different people (whom you do not know before taking the class) for about 10 seconds. And write down your feeling after each person. (Pick one of the followings. 1. I can trust this person. 2. I can’t trust this person. 3. I am not sure if I can trust this person.) After the practice please ask yourself why you choose 1 (or 2, 3) more often. Next, repeat the same routine but with some physical contact (e.g. hand shake). Will your choice be different this time? The power of physical touch (e.g. infants, truth telling, and even health …). Using touches to not only raise your own self-esteem but also other people’s. When you say you want to “get in touch with someone”, why not reach out and really touch someone?

Homework: 1. Please find a friend or two and listen to their goals and encourage them to go for it. (It is better accompanied with some physical contact.) Please write down your thoughts after doing it. 2. Think of an unpleasant event. Write down how you can change your response in order to feel good about the same event.