Using Ratiocination to Revise Writing

Ratiocination Ratiocination is the process of exact thinking Ratiocination Ratiocination is the process of exact thinking. We will REVISE AND EDIT our rough drafts using this PROCESS.

Step 1a. “To Be” Circle ALL linking and helping verbs in the essay Step 1a. “To Be” Circle ALL linking and helping verbs in the essay. Contractions count, too. (Isn’t, Wasn’t, etc.) *Am *Can *Is *Would *Are *Could *Should *Be *Had *Was *Being *Have *Were *Been *Has *Will How many weak verbs do you have? Write that number at the top of your paper. *Delete ALL contractions-replace with action verbs (meaningful and exact) -fix passive voice to active voice -leave alone if other options would be for the worse

Step 1b. *Revise your paper as much as possible to reduce the number of weak verbs by half. *Using a pen, write the strong verb above the “to be verb” you are replacing. Example: I had a heavy bag on my back. lugged

More Examples Example: People claim that the only way for children to gain full emotional and behavioral skills is to be raised by both a mother and a father. Revision: People claim children need both a mother and father to gain full emotional and behavioral skills. Example: As this subject continues to be looked down on people must realize that single parents are becoming more common in today’s world. Revision: As the debate continues, people must recognize single parent households constitute most of today’s families.

Step 2. Sentence Variety 1. [Bracket] the first word in every sentence Step 2. Sentence Variety 1. [Bracket] the first word in every sentence. This shows whether you are beginning too many sentences the same way. 2. If many (3+) sentences begin with the same word or phrase, revise. Think about transitional words and whether they are effective. 3. You can start the sentence with a prepositional or an introductory phrase.

Examples Example: [I ] hated going camping in the woods during the summer. [I] packed my clothes with little effort. Revision: During the summer, I hated going camping. With little effort, I packed my clothes. Revision: Since I hated camping during the summer, I packed my clothes with little effort. Example: [My mom was] a stay at home mom for many years. [My mom was] the one who was the nurturer and demonstrated love and compassion to my siblings and me by hugging, cuddling, and kissing all of us. [My mom was] personally involved in teaching us throughout all the stages of development and shared in the joy of our childhood accomplishments. A stay at home mom for many years, my mom nurtured and demonstrated love and compassion to my siblings and me by hugging, cuddling, and kissing us. In addition to teaching us affection, she personally taught us throughout all stages of development and shared our joy through each childhood accomplishment.

Step 3. Repetition 1. Revise your writing for repetitions. 2 Step 3. Repetition 1. Revise your writing for repetitions. 2. With a colored pencil, draw a wavy line beneath words that have been repeated (3+ times). Include: “a,” “an,” “the” -if the repetition is for emphasis, leave it. -if the repetition is for parallel structure, leave it. -if the repetition is careless, replace.

Step 4a: Sentence Length, Run-ons, and Fragments Use two alternating colors to underline each sentence. This will help you to do two things: 1. Check if your sentence lengths are varied. *You need a combination of long and short sentences. *Too many short sentences prevents your sentences from flowing. *Too many long sentences confuses readers. To fix: -same length sentences, shorten or lengthen for variety -too many short, choppy sentences, combine -too many long, complex sentences, separate and shorten

Step 4b 2. Find RUN-ONS and FRAGMENTS a. Correct any of these mistakes. A run-on sentence is when you put several sentences together with an incorrect or no punctuation. Ex. The rain was pouring, it came down in huge drops. The rain was pouring it came down in huge drops. A fragment is not a complete thought and needs a subject and a predicate. Ex. As we walked to the park on the weekend. Because we were late for the party. (dependent clause) And prevent further violence in peaceful American cities and towns by creating gun ownership laws.

Step 5. “Dead Words” 1. Revise your vocabulary to more specific, detailed words. 2. Use a highlighter to highlight all plain words such as: said, very, got, get, nice, bad, thing, good, stuff, awesome, wonderful, really, a lot, so (except the conjunction), every, some, any. 3. Use more vivid words in their place; write the new words above the highlighted words you will replace.

Step 6: Cut the Clutter Put a triangle around “There is,” There are,” “it is,” “it was,” “this is” (use action verbs) Mark out “I think,” “I feel,” “in my opinion,” “personally,” “I believe,” “it is my opinion,” Mark out all instances of “you” with an X -do not directly address your audience in formal writing -be careful when replacing “you” with “one” (it can sound forced)

Step 7 1. Whenever you describe by using comparisons, use figurative language. This makes your writing more interesting. 2. Improve your writing by including similes, metaphors, and analogies. Similes: Choose a word in your writing and compare it with something else using the words “like” or “as. Write the new sentence in the margin. Example: Guns in a home pose a danger to small children as a bottle of poison left on the kitchen table. 4. Metaphor: Choose an idea in your writing and describe it by stating that it is/was something else. Do not use the words “like” or “as. Write the new sentence in the margin. Example: Guns, the real killer in the night, pose a danger to small children.

Draw a box around all clichés Step 8: Clichés Draw a box around all clichés Ex. When considering the death penalty, citizens should ascribe to the old adage: an eye for an eye. Ex. Bullies should face severe punishment because what goes around comes around. -Revise for originality -If the cliché is in dialogue, leave it.