Grace Bible Church Glorifying God by Making Disciples of Jesus Christ

Solutions to Foolishness in Marriage, Part. 3: Selected Proverbs Are you wise and building up your home, or foolish and tearing it down with your own hands? We must be wise and diligent to resist society’s pressures against marriage

Review The naive lack knowledge and discernment resulting in gullibility which can be exploited (Prov. 22:3) The Solution: Heed the call of wisdom - become a student of the Scriptures & seek godly counsel

Review The counsel of the wicked is deceitful - Proverbs 12:5; 13:20; Psalm 1 The Solution: Avoid the ungodly and walk with those who are wise so that you will become wise (Proverbs 13:20)

Review Pride blinds people to the truth and makes people stubborn in their sin - Proverbs 12:15; 30:12 The Solution: Be humble, fear the Lord, and turn away from evil (Proverbs 3:7; James 4:6) The fear of the Lord is also the solution to foolishness - Proverbs 1:7; 8:13; 9:10

Review Wickedness is the opposite of righteousness and moves a person away from God’s design The Solution: Repentance from sin that leads to faith in the Lord Jesus Christ

Review Stubbornness is an increasing obstinacy toward God that is part of foolishness.

Review Married to a fool? Don’t be stubborn or provoking yourself. Confess your own foolishness. Fulfill your God given role: Men, sacrificially love your wife. Ladies, be chaste & respectful

Review The Solution to Stubbornness: Righteousness and humility Self righteousness sets a false standard and blinds a person to their own faults The Solution: Humility, the word of God and godly counselors

Review The selfish are primarily concerned with their own profit and pleasure with little concern for others The Solution: Develop the humble and sacrificial attitude of Christ - learn to be like a dog, not a tick

Demanding, Contention & Nagging None of these are problems in a mature and godly marriage Desires, reasons & reminders can be expressed without being demanding, contentious or nagging How much you demand and nag are indicators of how well you are doing at being a godly spouse

Demanding, Contention & Nagging Proverbs 19:13; Proverbs 27:15 - the more contentious the demands, the more irritating they will be Yielding to the nagging is always only a temporary fix - the underlying problem must also be corrected

Demanding, Contention & Nagging Proverbs 21:9, 19 - Contention / nagging drives people away to isolate themselves The solution: become unselfish by humbling yourself and developing the attitude of Christ - Phil. 2:3-8 Continue to be humble and patient seeking to please God

Critical & Quarreling Pride and self-righteousness escalate demanding and nagging to complaining and quarreling Complaining & quarreling reveals foolishness and drives wedges in relationships (Prov. 20:3; 17:1)

Critical & Quarreling We are to strive to be a peace with all men (Rom. 12:18), but that is not possible with some people Pride alone will stoke the fires of criticism and quarreling, and self- righteousness adds a blower to it

Critical & Quarreling Even a person with OCD does not have to complain - they can simply do the work themselves If someone does the work without complaint to raise the standard - there is no valid complaint against it

Critical & Quarreling It is miserable to work for & worse to live with critical & complaining people The solution: Only God’s standards are important - Pursue peace - Romans 14:7-10, 19. Humble yourself, be realistic, lower your expectations. Learn to love people with their flaws - John 13

Temperamental, Harsh & Hateful Wickedness escalates the expressions of pride, self-righteousness and selfishness into anger and hate Proverbs 29:11; 14:29 - How fast you lose your temper is an indicator of your foolishness

Temperamental, Harsh & Hateful A hot temper invariably results in aggravating the situation – Prov. 29:22 The wise learn to hold their temper and diffuse contention - Proverbs 15:1, 18 A continued hot-temper, harshness and hatred will drive even loving people away - Proverbs 15:17

Temperamental, Harsh & Hateful The Solution: If married to such a person, commit yourself to pleasing God in the midst of the situation If you are a harsh person: Repent and follow Jesus being transformed through God’s word. Get discipled

Grace Bible Church Glorifying God by Making Disciples of Jesus Christ