WWW.MNDGMZMINISTRIES.ORG Reclaiming the Rules: Finding Identity in Christ. WWW.MNDGMZMINISTRIES.ORG

The Stewardship of Pain: The Spirituality of Self-Care Karen Cleveland, PhD

Stewardship An ethic that embodies the responsible planning and management of resources. Conducting, supervising, managing of something The careful and responsible management of something entrusted to one’s care.

Aspects of Christian Stewardship Principle of ownership – God is the owner and owners have rights. Psalm 24:1, “The earth is the Lord’s, and everything in it. The world and all its people belong to him. Principle of responsibility – We have responsibilities as stewards. Genesis 1:28, “Be fruitful and multiply. Fill the earth and govern it…” Principle of accountability – We are managing the possessions of another. (The parable of the talents) Principle of reward – Colossians 3:23-24, “Work willingly at whatever you do, as though you were working for the Lord rather than for people. Remember that the Lord will give you an inheritance as your reward, and that the Master you are serving is Christ.

Mere Christianity ~CS Lewis Every faculty you have, your power of thinking or of moving your limbs from moment to moment, is given you by God. If you devoted every moment of your whole life exclusively to His service, you could not give Him anything that was not in a sense His own already.

Stewardship defines the relationship between God and us. Think of the relationship between a parent and child regarding property. We are the caretakers and managers of all that belongs to God. Strength to steward effectively must come from God, through the Holy Spirit in us – otherwise it is vain and self- righteous. Stewardship is obedient witness to God’s sovereignty and motivates us to action in both proclaiming and living Gospel truth.

Stewardship of Pain?? Fredrick Buechner “You have had a good deal of pain in your life, and you have been a good steward of it.” “We are never more alive to life than when it hurts – never more aware both of our own powerlessness to save ourselves and of at least the possibility of a power beyond ourselves to save us and heal us if we can only open ourselves to it…never more in touch with hope than we are then, if only the hope of another human presence to be with us and for us.”

Dealing with Pain: Bury it Be trapped by it Steward it Maybe the most tempting Way of survival Be trapped by it Excuse for failure Steward it Share it Leads to growth

Being a steward of pain: “Taking the risk of being open, of reaching out, of keeping in touch with the pain as well as the joy of what happens because at no time more than at a painful time do we live out of the depths of who we are instead of out of the shallows. There is no guarantee that we will find a pearl in the depths, that the end of our pain will have a happy end, or even any ending at all, but at least we stand a chance of finding in those depths who we most deeply and humanly are and who each other are.” ~Buechner

Stewarding our Pain: Happens in relationship: open to God and to others “By inviting God into our difficulties we ground life – even its sad moments – in joy and hope…ultimately mourning means facing what wounds us in the presence of the One who can heal.” ~Henri Nouwen We must take pain out of its isolation and into community Our pain is in larger hands, connects us to Christ, and draws us to Him. Not “how can I get rid of” but “how can I grow through” How will we respond to pain?

Hope: A feeling of expectation or desire for a certain thing to happen A feeling of trust A strong or confident expectation Hold onto the eternal in the midst of the temporal. “We follow One who is not limited or defeated by the world’s suffering.” ~Nouwen

Gratitude: Does not mean repressing our hurts It means to live life as a gift to be received thankfully – embracing ALL of life – the good and the bad, the joyful and the painful – aware of God’s presence in the midst of it all.

Letting God be God Jesus asleep in the back of the boat. We are fearful people Prayer converts our fear to faith, our tendency to control to trust, our desire to possess to recognizing the Giver.

True Compassion: Literally means “to suffer with” Means to enter others’ dark moments, to walk into places of pain without flinching or looking away. It holds back from offering quick, eager explanations when tragedy meets someone we know or love Can really only be done by Holy Spirit within

“Community, then, cannot grow out of loneliness, but comes when the person who begins to recognize his or her belovedness greets the belovedness of the other. The God alive in me greets the God resident in you. When people can cease having to be for us everything, we can accept the fact they may still have a gift for us. They are partial reflections of the great love of God, but reflections nevertheless. We see that gift precisely and only once we give up requiring that person to be everything, to be God. We see him or her as a limited expression of an unlimited love.”

“To live and serve and worship with others thereby brings us to a place where we come together and remind each other by our mutual interdependence that we are not God, that we cannot meet our own needs, and that we cannot completely fulfill each other’s needs. There is something wonderfully humbling and freeing about this. For we find a place where people give one another grace. That we are not God does not mean that we cannot mediate (if in a limited way) the unlimited love of God. Community is the place of joy and celebration where we are willing to say, “yes, we have begun to overcome in Christ.”

Confession True community requires true confession. “Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results.” ~James 5:16 In secret, pain grows. In isolation, wounds fester. Brought to light, healing happens. In community, wounds our soothed.

So wait…what do we do?? Be stewards of our own pain. Live with hope. Live with gratitude. Let God be God. Be in community – with God and with others. Part of authentic community is confession Confession – bring things to light (stewardship)

WWW.MNDGMZMINISTRIES.ORG Reclaiming the Rules: Finding Identity in Christ. WWW.MNDGMZMINISTRIES.ORG