Cohesion and Coherence

Connection

clarity cohesion coherence

Cohesion

Sense of Flow

Some astonishing question about the nature of the universe have been raised by scientists studying black hole in space. The collapse of a dead star into a point perhaps no larger than a marble creates a black hole. So much matter compressed into so little volume changes the fabric of space around it in puzzling ways. Some astonishing question about the nature of the universe have been raised by scientists studying black hole in space. A black hole is created by the collapse of a dead star into a point perhaps no larger than a marble. So much matter compressed into so little volume changes the fabric of space around it in puzzling ways.

Sentences are cohesive when the last few words of one set up information that appears in the first few words of the next.

Avoid Passive?

Some astonishing question about the nature of the universe have been raised by scientists studying black hole in space. The collapse of a dead star into a point perhaps no larger than a marble creates a black hole. So much matter compressed into so little volume changes the fabric of space around it in puzzling ways. Some astonishing question about the nature of the universe have been raised by scientists studying black hole in space. A black hole is created by the collapse of a dead star into a point perhaps no larger than a marble. So much matter compressed into so little volume changes the fabric of space around it in puzzling ways.

Diagnosis and Revision: Old Before New

Put familiar information before unfamiliar information

Familiar Information … black hole in space. A black hole is created… … changes the fabric of space around it in puzzling ways. Astronomers have reported that…

Begin sentences with information familiar to your readers. End sentences with information that readers cannot anticipate.

For readers, a passage’s overall cohesion trumps the clarity of individual sentences.

Coherence

Sense of Whole

Example of Incoherent Writing I have a really old car. The fan-belt of my car broke when was on my way home. My friend was having a birthday party. It was 8:00 p.m. last night when it started, but I was too late. Lights were on in a house by the side of the road. I needed to make a phone call so I went to the house.... To make a long story short, it ended up costing me over $200.00.

The subjects of each sentence must be related. The sentences must share common themes or ideas. A sentence states what the same passage is about.

Diagnosis and Revision: Topic

Example Consistent ideas toward the beginnings of sentences, especially in their subjects, help readers understand what a passage is generally about. A sense of coherence arises when a sequence of topics comprise a narrow set of related ideas. But the context of each sentence is lost by seemingly random shifts of topics. Unfocused, even disorganized paragraphs result when that happens.

Analyze Do the underlined words constitute a relatively small set? Do the underlined words name the most important characters, real or abstract?

Rewrite Readers understand what a passage is generally about when they see consistent ideas toward the beginnings of sentences , especially in their subjects . They feel a passage is coherent when they read a sequence of topics that focuses on a narrow set of related ideas. But when topics seem to shift randomly , readers lose the context of each sentence. When that happens, they feel they are reading paragraphs that are unfocused and even disorganized.

Now the subjects form a strong TOPIC STRING: readers, they, they, they, topics, readers, that, they [readers]

Avoiding Distractions at The Beginning of a sentence

Throat-clearing

Throat-clearing typically begins with metadiscourse that connects a sentence to the previous one, with transitions such as and, but, therefore: And therefore…

And therefore, it is important to note… Then add a second kind of metadiscourse that expresses our attitude toward what is coming, word such as fortunately, perhaps, allegedly, it is important to note, for the most part, or in a manner of speaking: And therefore, it is important to note…

Then we indicate time, place, or manner: And therefore, it is important to note that, in Eastern states since 1980…

Only then do we get to the subject/topic: And therefore, it is important to note that, in Eastern states since 1980, acid rain has become a serious problem.

Revise Since 1980, therefore, acid rain has become a serious problem in the Eastern states.

Two Qualifications

Alleged Monotony “Moral climate” is created … . Moral climate results… . In this night, moral climate acts… . A moral climate encourages… . “Moral climate” is created … . This climate results… . In this night, morality acts… . A moral climate encourages… .

Be cautious, though: most writers change topics too often.

Faked Coherence Because the press is the major medium of interaction between the president and the people, how it portrays him influence his popularity. Therefore, it should report on the president objectively.

Summing Up

1. Begin sentences with subjects that communicate old information, information that your readers are familiar with; give new, unfamiliar information toward the ends of sentences

The number of dead in the Civil War exceeded all other wars in American history combined. A reason for the lingering animosity between North and South today is the memory of this terrible carnage. Of all the wars in American history, none has exceeded the Civil War in the number of dead. The memory of this terrible carnage is one reason for the lingering animosity between North and South today.

2. Through a series of sentences, keep your topics short and reasonably consistent.