All The Information We Hope You Never Need Tammy Bunch, Ed.D., Topping Elementary, North Kansas City School District Glenda Fine, Winnwood Elementary, North Kansas City School District

Objectives Explain our experience with providing support to staff, students, and families affected by an anticipated or unanticipated loss. Explain purpose of crisis response Provide ideas for student, parent, and staff support Provide grief resources

Crisis Response Reduce Fear Facilitate Grieving Promote Education Provide background

Types of Grief Response Anticipated Death Unanticipated Death

Leveled Support Situational School Some situations require more support than others

Grief is Unique Each child's grief is as unique to him or her as was their relationship with the deceased. Because of this, the way children experience and express their grief will vary for each person. Some children have a need to talk about the person who died and their feelings about it; others might not talk about the person at all; and even others, might express their grief through art, play, music or writing. In whatever way children might experience and respond to their grief, these expressions are how they are adapting to life without the physical presence of that person and adjusting to one of memories. It is important not to assume what children might be feeling about a person's death. Reactions vary from sadness, anger, fear, guilt and even relief. It is important to listen to children, meet them on their terms and come to understand their unique grief reactions. ~National Alliance for Grieving Children Provide background as to how grief counseling in the district started. Use example of Fox Hill.

Unanticipated Death Depends on situation and school Preparation support to principal and counselor Staff support Student Support Parent/family support

Preparation Support Template for letters to parents Template for phone call/email to parents Template for morning announcement Checklist for things to think about Make sure you remove the affected family from any phone call or email list that is used.

Check List Are there siblings in your building? Are there younger or older siblings in another building? Are there cousins or other relatives? Are there students who have suffered a recent loss? Are there staff members who have suffered a recent loss? Who are former classroom teachers, coaches, music teachers, etc. of the student? Cultural Considerations? Ways of grieving Funerals Family-many “cousins”

Staff Support Provide support to building counselor Provide support to building administration Provide support to building staff

Staff Meeting Happens before or after school Provide details of death to all staff Explain plan for grief services for classrooms and individual students Discuss importance of staff self care Provide time after the first school day for staff to voluntarily come together to debrief Talking Points Taking Care of YOU

Student Support Counseling support in classrooms affected by loss Sometimes this is all classrooms Could be a specific grade level Classroom teacher makes decision as to if they or the support counselor will take the lead Initial discussion is 15-20 minutes Individual students who are struggling are sent to a common location for extra support List of students affected by recent loss In thinking about which classrooms might need additional counselor support – consider other recent losses – death of grandparents / ill family members / etc.

Student Support Draw a picture Make a card Talk Write a letter Art

Student Support Sentence Starters… I remember a time when we.. It was fun when we... I wish we... I feel… I hope… Thank You for…

Parent/Family Support After school or evening parent meeting Provide information to parents about the grief process for kids

Anticipated Death Use framework of support How do we support our student? Facebook pages : Super hero Fan club T-Shirts – jeans day - $ to families Hospital Staff – talk to staff and classroom Informed staff of what to expect safe place to ask questions Pros – child/family receive lots of widespread support One place for information / updates to be posted Involvement of community / make-a-wish / etc.   Cons – can become all-consuming of your time

Anticipated Death Making pillows with siblings Providing Meals / gift cards for family Scentsy Buddies

Anticipated Death How do we support the family? Make a Wish Dream Factory Family Photos Planting of Tree Buddy Bench

After Care and Follow Up Trigger Dates Remembering vs. Remaining

Conclusion For all conference related information, download the Conference Yapp App. The Yapp ID is MSCA17. Please complete the Workshop Evaluation: http://tinyurl.com/mscaworkshop17 Please complete the Full Conference Evaluation:http://tinyurl.com/MSCAeval17 Support this year’s Annual Project through raffles, Monday reserved seating, poker run, project walk, and service project. Make plans to participate in evening activities: Hospitalities & Poker Run from 5:00 to 7:00 p.m. Service Project Activity beginning at 7:00 p.m. Trivia Night beginning at 7:00 p.m. Project Walk beginning at 9:00 p.m. Evening Social & Live Music beginning at 10:00 p.m. For more information on MSCA, like us on Facebook (mymsca) and follow us on Twitter (@myMSCA).