COHABITATION Prof. Oanh Tran Thi Van Binh Dinh Ha Nguyen Thi Tung Anh Nguyen Van Thanh Nguyen

When You Can Get the Milk for Free?” “Why Buy the Cow, When You Can Get the Milk for Free?”

Outline

The Problem Cohabitation violates the institute of marriage by lacking a true commitment. Cohabitation Living together in a sexual relationship without being married

Reasons Given for Cohabitation Economic advantages “We can save money by sharing living expenses.” Time together “We are able to spend more time together.”

Reasons for Cohabitation (cont.) Increased intimacy “We have more opportunities to share sexual and emotional intimacy without getting married.” Less complicated dissolution “If the relationship doesn’t work out, there is no messy divorce.”

Reasons for Cohabitation (cont.) “Testing” compatibility “Living together enables us to better learn about each other’s habits and character and see how we operate together day-to-day.” Trial marriage “We are planning to marry soon.”

New Info on Cohabitation Cohabitation is on the rise for older individuals Reasons: Avoid loss of financial benefits such as alimony, welfare, or pension checks Loss of a spouse to death or divorce and fear of losing another spouse Pain and anger as a result of a divorce

Health Effects of Cohabitation Increased risk of drug abuse Higher risk of physical, emotional, and mental abuse Unstable relationship Higher overall rates of violence among cohabitors. Violent relationship can lead to depression, suicide, homicide, or death.

Possible Solutions Do Not Cohabitate Legal Cohabitation Agreement Have faith in your relationship Have high self-esteem Legal Cohabitation Agreement Entered into by unmarried person who live together In agreement, the parties can agree with respect to acquisition, disposition of property upon separation, personal rights, obligation of either party, control of property, etc.

Best Solution Refrain from Cohabitation Couples living together have the lowest level of premarital satisfaction when compared to other living arrangements. Married couples that cohabitated prior to marriage have poorer communication skills in discussing problems than couples that did not cohabitate. Cohabitating couples are less sexually committed and trustworthy.

Summary Cohabitation rates increased from 500,000 in 1970 to 5.5 million people cohabitating in 2000 60-75% of first marriages preceded by cohabitation 80-85% of re-marriages preceded by cohabitation

Consequences Cohabitation rates 5.7 3.4 0.6 Millions people 80-85% of re-marriages preceded 60-75% of first marriages preceded 5.7 3.4 I want to show you some information I get from a Website of WHO about cohabitation rates. In 2006 is 0.6 million people In 2011 is 3.4 million people In 2013 is 5.7 million people Cohabitation rates increased fast You can see the additional people between 2006 and 2013 is 5.1 millions . It is A surprising number and a terrible number. Why is a terrible number? Do you know 80-85% of them re marriages preceded and 60 – 75 of first marriages preceded. So they have love, they live together. May be they have a new family. Why did they split on? why did they break up? Why they must find it that’s a new husband or new wife? Were they wrong when decide make cohabitation 0.6 2006 2011 2013 Millions people

Consequences Why and How They must work and earn money for their life. For instance, If a man have a works and the woman no. He always feel uncomfortable and he stress they will have conflict. And Several studies show that cohabitating increases the risk of drug use and physical, mental , and emotional abuse. Badly, Overall rates of violence in cohabitating couples were double that of married couples and severe violence was 5 times higher for cohabitors.

Summary Several studies show that cohabitating increases the risk of drug use and physical, mental , and emotional abuse. Overall rates of violence in cohabitating couples were double that of married couples and severe violence was 5 times higher for cohabitors.

Consequences Why and how

Summary Cohabitating couples have lower levels of personal happiness and higher rates of depression than married couples Cohabitors have more negative attitudes about marriage than non-cohabitors.

Consequences Consequence

“The Bottom Line” Lack of commitment to marriage A strong commitment is the basis of marriage. Cohabitating couples are more oriented toward their own personal autonomy. Cohabitors are more willing to terminate the relationship. Inability to make a decision about marriage Cohabitation reflects uncertainty.

The End Result Continuing to cohabitate will continue to raise the divorce rate for couples who do get married after cohabitation. Cohabitation increases the chances of having children out of wedlock. Ending the cohabitation and divorce will result in single parent homes.

Q&A