Revising the Rough Draft Research Paper

General Comments RE-VISION Rough Draft grade  Final draft 1st half corrections  2nd half Errors once identified may not be marked throughout the paper SEE ME – Conferences are mandatory 3rd Hour, 5th Hour, After school

The Big 6 Writing Style Organization Use of evidence Documentation Transitions Clarity and Fluidity

Writing Style Word Choice (REP) (Inf) Sentence variety Contractions Wrong word, too vague, informal (huge, lots) Sentence variety This shows Contractions 3rd person Verb tense Biased “This disgusting statistic …”

Organization Order of arguments Paragraphs: Topic sentence Explanation/expansion of that topic sentence Introduction to evidence Explanation of evidence Concluding sentence

Use of Evidence Evidence should not appear in first sentence of paragraph Introduce the evidence Explain the evidence

Use of Evidence Do not state the obvious in your explanation “36 states passed the law the first year, only 2 the next” (Smith, par. 6) Fewer states passed the law the second year than the first. A change in public opinion after the tragedy in Illinois led to the reduction of states passing laws of this nature.

Documentation All quotations All paraphrased material More than one sentence, back to back, document at the end (Mason 1) (Mason, par. 1) (Mason, par. 4-6)

Transitions Introduction to thesis paragraph How does the story illustrate the subject of this paper?

Clarity and Fluidity Combine sentences Read aloud to yourself Read out loud to someone else SS- Sentence Structure

A 123 Proofreading Do not damage the integrity of your work! Format Spelling Punctuation Capitalization Numbers A 123

Abbreviations D Awk SS Inf. RO A SF a I-E T EX-EV TS? WC CS

Although Although is NOT the same as HOWEVER

Although We decided not to wear our jackets when we went for a walk, although the weather was rather chilly. Although the weather was rather chilly, we decided not to wear our jackets when we went for a walk.

Common English Errors Use of the apostrophe The boys are going to find a dog. The boy’s dog at his homework. The boys’ dog ran away.

Common English Errors Run-on sentences He seemed to recover just fine but the effects were to last a lifetime. The cops had discovered who the culprit was he was long gone by then.

Common English Errors Effect/Affect What are the various effects of the depletion of the ozone layer? The effects include: How will the earth be affected by the depletion of the ozone layer?

Titles Italicize books, magazines, journals, movies “Quotation marks for articles and abbreviated titles” Capitalization of titles The Turn of the Screw by Henry Miller

Acronyms, Abbreviations and More American Diabetes Association (ADA) United States NOT U.S. Names of experts John Smith Smith Ruhland says that the changes have been hard for people. WHO?

Numbers Arabic numbers for numbers that cannot be spelled out in one or two words (543, 3 ½ ) Numbers below 10 grouped with higher numbers should be written in Arabic numbers (3 out of 50 subjects)

Numbers Number vs. Amount (Can be counted) vs (Cannot be counted) Combining large numbers (3.5 million) Use words for numbers when beginning a sentence. Dollars $43, $3.4 million Percent–thirty-four percent

Conclusions Do not say “I” or “You” Length = Introduction DO NOT SAY “In Conclusion” Logically follow the rest of the paper

Cause/Effect Causes Effects Solutions 1 2 3 Conclusion = Which will be recommended and why?

Arg For/Against Review/summary necessary? Alternatives? Recommendation and why?

Other Options Continue the case study or the hypothetical situation to its conclusion How does the solution to the problem go beyond the scope of the immediate issue? Explain.