Chapter 12 Working with gay persons Dr. Sandra Roberts

Correct Terminology American Psychological Association Committee on Lesbian and Gay Concerns in 1991 adopted: Gay male and lesbian rather than homosexual Gay persons: gay men and woman Antigay prejudice rather then homophobia Bisexual: a person attracted to both sexes Transgender: persons who believe their physical gender doesn’t match their emotional and psychological gender (cross-dressers, drag queens, female impersonators, sex-change operations) GLBT: gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender Hermaphrodite: born with both male and female sexual organs.

Is this a Gay Woman?

Is this a Gay Man?

Stereotypes 1 Gays Cluster in Certain Occupations (dancer, designer, hair stylist) Many gay men are in masculine occupations but they stay in the closet to survive. In a survey of 4000 gays, there were more gay men and women in science & engineering, insurance, finance, and computers than social services, fashion, entertainment and art where gays cluster because they feel safe there. 2 People who associate with gays are gay themselves Called “courtesy stigma” which creates barriers to gays’ establishing support relationships and mentor relationships.

Stereotypes Gays in sensitive or high level jobs are a security risk Gay employees are easy targets for blackmail by con artists because they hide their homosexuality. Gay persons don’t have normal lasting relationships 40-60% gay men & 45-80% gay women are in committed relationships, some lasting 20 years or more. There is no difference between heterosexual and gay persons on any of the measures of relationship satisfaction. Gay men act feminine an lesbians act masculine Remember Rock Hudson? Most gay partners are dual-earners with a relationship pattern emphasizing companionship, sharing, and equality.

Stereotypes Gay Sex is Immoral and Gay Persons are Promiscuous This is a religious or philosophical belief that can not be rationally proved or disproved. A percentage of the population engages in promiscuous sex, regardless of sexual orientation. Anyone can contract AIDS, not just gays You can legally fire a gay person for being gay in 36 states. True Gay Persons are a Bad Influence on Children Sexual orientation is not a factor in child molestation, both gay and straight persons are convicted.

Gay Persons Raising Children Until recently courts denied parental rights to gay persons because the children might be teased and stigmatized by other children and adults. Today 20% gay male couples and 34% gay female couples have children and their lives are very similar to heterosexual parents. There is no evidence that a gay parent will influence a child to become gay.

Milestones in Gay History 1952 APA classify gayness as mental illness 1969 Stonewall Riots in NY in response to raid on Greenwich Village gay bar called Stonewall Inn 1970 Gay Pride parade in NYC 1973 APA says homosexuality not a mental illness 1990 Gay persons can not change their sexual orientation 1982 Gay Games founded in San Francisco 1992 President Clinton issues executive order ending “gay security risk” and proposes removing military’s ban on gay persons. 1997 Ellen DeGeneres comes out

Current Profile 2.7% of men are gay 1.3% of women are gay 2% of all persons are gay Less than 1% of all U.S. households claim to be gay (601,209 of 105,500) Out of closet gays are better educated (60% have college degree) and function effectively in responsible well paid occupations. Gay mens wages were 27% lower than straight men in same jobs with same education.

Attitudes Towards Gay Rights Approve of Gay Rights Least Likely to Approve of Gay Rights Liberal Seldom/never attend church Live in West & urban areas Younger, female College graduate Democrat or independent Unmarried, good income Conservative Strongly religions Live in South & Midwest in rural areas Older, male Less educated Republican Don’t personally know gay person Males describe self as high in assertiveness, low in feminine traits.

Gay Discrimination Fundamentalism (literal interpretation of Bible) tends to harbor antigay prejudice. Most negative attitudes are those expressed by straight men toward gay men Negative attitudes towards gay men are more hostile than attitudes towards lesbians. There is increasing public acceptance of Gay Rights, even though 40% of gay employees say they have been harassed or denied promotion.

Religion and Gays U.S. Roman Catholic Bishops in 2006 advised gays to be celibate because church considers their sexuality to be “disordered.” Mormons in Utah contributed millions to support ban on gay marriage Southern Baptist Convention believe people can change their sexual orientation and called on its 16M members and 42,000 churches to convert gays into heterosexual if they accept Jesus Christ and reject their sinful, destructive lifestyle.

Phases of Gay Awareness Confusion and denial Comparison and recognition (before adolescence) Tolerance and experimentation (develop gay friends) Acceptance and Coming Out, may cause intense emotional distress

Gay Issue: Born Gay or Made to be Gay? Gays are found in every society, even though no society socializes children into homosexual roles or sets up gay role models. Scientists have detected a “gay gene” Hormones secreted in mother’s womb during pregnancy affect hormone balance of child There are striking differences between brains of gays and straights, and their brains respond differently to sexual odors

Gay Issue: Nature – Nurture Controversy Homosexuality is something people are born with not he result of an upbringing or environmental influence 33% overall population, 75% gay respondents Gay men and lesbians can change their sexual orientation through therapy, willpower, or religious conviction 45% overall population, 11% gay

Gay Issue: Managing a Gay Identity in the Workplace 71% men & 81% women hide their gay orientation at work, have to devote great energy to pretending they have a lifestyle they don’t. Fear of disclosure is always present Gays who come out have apprehension and anxiety of becoming target of abuse, fired or demoted, effusive sympathy and support. Some gays minimize gayness Virtually all gay males who have come out say they don’t regret the decision, sense of relief, reduced stress, enhanced self-image, feelings of freedom.

Gay Issue: Gaining Legal Rights Eight nations have national civil rights laws to protect gay employees from workplace discrimination: Denmark, France, Israel, New Zealand, Norway, South Africa, Sweden, and Netherlands. U.S. gay persons are not included in Civil Rights laws Only a few states protect gay persons, mostly government employees are protected. Only six states provide for gay employees’ partners to have access to same benefits that married partners enjoy. President Clinton signed executive order prohibiting discrimination against gay persons in the military. Because of controversy, it became “don’t ask, don’t tell” President Clinton signed executive order prohibiting discrimination against gay federal employees. President Bush removed the sexual orientation information from the federal websites.

Gay Issue: Family Rights Gay partners cannot file joint tax returns Gay employees usually cannot include their partners in their health plan When gay persons become seriously ill or die, their partners can’t legitimately take time off to attend the illness or funeral When gays are hospitalized, their partners may be barred from their bedside because they aren’t a family member Gays are often denied custody or visitation of their own children, and are not allowed to adopt children in most states

Three types of laws address family rights issues of same sex partners Domestic partnerships – some employee benefits rights to unmarried couples (health care and life insurance) Civil unions – Give states (CT, NJ, NH, MASS, VT) give partners access to all of the legal rights and responsibilities that the state recognizes for married partners, but do not entail religious marriage rights (wills, workers compensation, unemployment, state tax, parenting, separation and divorce). They do not apply to federal laws (IRS). Same-sex marriage laws are not recognized by the U.S. government

Leadership Challenges Prejudice and discrimination drain corporate assets (talent, energy, productivity) Seeing gays as abnormal blocks spontaneity The sexual double standard (world uses a heterosexual lens) Walls of silence deaden creativity Treating gay persons as tokens Hostile corporate cultures and gay ghettos The Lavender Glass Ceiling

Leadership Opportunities Follow lead of savvy organizations Recognize that gay persons have high-value skills Encourage company benefits for employees’ partners Promote education about gay issues Help crate a savvy corporate culture Play to the marketplace, GLBT buying power in ‘03 was $485 Billion

Aspects of Sexuality from inner core to outer

Feminine-Masculine and Gay-Straight are not always either-or The concept of continuum or degree