Life Changes for Couples “B - E” - Believe, Commit, Discover, Expose” Today’s Lesson – June 12, 2016 Life Changes for Couples “B - E” - Believe, Commit, Discover, Expose”

Life Changes for Couples by James M. Reeves A Biblical 12-Step Journey for Marriage Enrichment

“B” - Believe the Truth

We Came to Believe that a Power Greater than Ourselves could Restore us to Sanity Not just belief about God - about ourselves, our spouse, or actions, and feelings Belief in all areas of life The greatest challenge isn’t believing in God. It is the God in whom we believe.

The issue isn’t whether you have questions or doubts but what kind of doubter you are The Honest Doubter - Jeremiah 29:13 The Dishonest Doubter - Prov. 28:14 Read and Discuss the Verses Where do our doubts come from? What are some of your doubts? Table Talk

“C” - Commit to Christ

We Must Surrender Our Self-Will and, Instead, Trust in the Will of God for Our Lives Where are you in your Marriage? Bill Hybel Story Building the camp fire Turning to fight Ready to get in the wheelbarrow

What Happens When We Turn Our Life Over to Him? Submission Begins With Presentation Presentation Leads to Transformation Transformation Leads to Revelation Romans 12: 1 - 2 (not conformed - transformed)

What is the Will of God for You? John 10:10 “The thief [Enemy] comes only to steal, kill, and destroy; I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly.: Describe ways you and your spouse are living abundantly because of your commitment to Christ Table Talk

“D” - Discover Responsibility

“Made a Searching and Fearless Moral Inventory of Ourselves” Rigorous Honesty is Key - Inventory What is Working - What is not? An Accurate Inventory can be Painful Ship Below the Waterline - How thick are your barnacles?

In One Sentence - Sum Up Your Family of Origin What was your role in the family? What role did others play (father, mother, siblings)? How did you feel about Your role? What effect has your family of origin had on your adult life?

Circumstances - Consequences Circumstances - things over which we have no control or input Name some of these Circumstances Consequences are the result of choices I make Some People Seem Adrift Unable to Deal with Either Circumstances or Consequences What Does the Bible Declare?

“See, I am setting before you today a blessing and a curse; the blessing, if you listen to the commandments of the Lord your God, which I am commanding you today; and the curse, if you do not listen to the commandments of the Lord your God, but turn aside from the way which I am commanding you today, by following other gods which you have not known.” Deuteronomy 11: 26 - 28

Tools For the Inventory The Seven Deadly Sins: Pride, Anger, Greed, Lust, Envy, Gluttony, Sloth The Fruit of the Spirit: Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness, Self-control

“E” - Expose the Secrets

“Admitted to God, to Ourselves, and to another Human Being the Exact Nature of our Wrongs.” Hidden Hurts Can Prevent Us from Abundant Living Relationships thrive in the light of honesty but die in the darkness of deception Imagine Confessing Your Faults to Your Spouse? After they recover - what happens next? Vulnerability is often the key to greater Intimacy

Helpful Scriptures on Confession “If we say that we have not sinned, we make Him a liar, and His word is not in us.” I John 1:10 “I acknowledged my sin to You, and my iniquity I did not hide; I said, I will confess my transgressions to the Lord; an You forgave the guilt of my sin.” Psalms 31: 9 - 10

Homework Getting Honest with Others Living in Integrity with Others Living in Transparency with Others Who Is Your Confessor? “Tell Me About Your Dark Side.”

Prayer Time Pray for your marriage Pray for your spouse – no fix them prayers Pray for Team Mates – arm us for spiritual warfare Pray for yourself – seek to realize your need to be more giving to your spouse

Life Change for Couples Next Week… June 19th Life Change for Couples F-G-H-I