An Overview of Human Sexuality For Foster/Adoptive Parents

Introductions Name Where you live Length of time fostering One expectation of training

Objectives Define sexuality Identify normal patterns of development Describe motivations of sexually active teens Define sexual responsibility Promote child’s healthy sexual development Assess media messages to youth Identify and dispel common myths about sex List major methods of contraception

Take a Stand – Agree or Disagree… Men and women are different in their feelings and desires. Women should stay home to care for children. Parents should share feelings about their sexuality. Girls should not ask boys out. Sex should be reserved for marriage.

Agree or Disagree – con’t Birth control is the woman’s responsibility. Teens should be scared into abstinence by seeing those dying of AIDS. Masturbation is healthy and natural. Either sex should feel free to initiate sexual acts.

My Parents Told Me.. Break into small groups. Identify recorders and reporters. Identify your parents’ message about each topic. Do you agree or disagree with their message? Money Friendship Love Relationships Being LGBTQ Marriage Sex Masturbation Being a Man/Woman

Approaches to Convey Message Telling and/or Moralizing Modeling Clarifying Values

Small Group Activity Share message you want to convey about the topic. Identify the approach you’d use: i.e., Telling/Moralizing Modeling Clarifying values Money Friendship Love Relationships Being Gay/Lesbian Marriage Sex Masturbation Being a Man/Woman

Human Sexuality… Is a function of the total personality Is universal and connected to all developmental areas Includes biological processes Includes self-concept Is expressed in interactions with either sex Includes sexual orientation Is powerfully influenced by religion, culture, family and friends

SEX Includes biological qualities particular to the male and female. Encompasses the biological processes associated with reproduction. Entails behavior specific to sexual relations.

LGBTQ and More Definitions Sexual orientation Gender identity Gender expression Lesbian Gay Bisexual Transgender Questioning A Straight Guide to LGTB Americans www.hrc.org

Sexual Development Physical Emotional Mental Social Moral

Life Cycle of Sexuality Birth to 3 years 4 – 8 years 9 – 12 years 13 – 18 years +

Teenage Sexuality On average, teens begin intercourse at 16. By 19, 80% males and 66% females have had sexual intercourse. 40% of 14 yr. olds will be pregnant by 19. 50% of sexually active teens don’t use birth control; most wait 6 months for RX. 50% pregnancies occur w/in first 6 mos. 96% teen moms keep their babies.

Youth Sexuality and Parental Response Define the behavior/situation. Identify your feelings. Clarify your values. Define problem in terms of its effects on the youth’s development and its consequences for others.

Reasons People Have Sex:

Reasons People Have Sex: For fun Out of love To have a baby Out of curiosity To prove adulthood To prove fe/maleness To show control Out of attraction Due to peer pressure Out of fear For revenge To be touched For money For attention To feel loved Facilitate discussion and ask, “What are some reasons people have sex?” (use text chat or raise hand) Summarize by reviewing the list of bullets. Bridge to next slide that asks, “Is what’s good for the goose good for the gander?” (i.e., teens and adults)

Is what’s good for the goose good for the gander ? How is sex the same/different for teens and adults? In what ways is sex satisfying to teens? In what ways is sex unsatisfying to teens? What motivates teens to have sex when its not satisfying?

I can’t get no satisfaction… Partners can be selfish. Sex can be scary. Sex can be painful. Teens may feel guilt, shame if its at odds with belief system. Sex doesn’t guarantee satisfaction.

Foster Parent’s Role in Child’s Healthy Sexual Development: Promote child’s overall development. Build child’s self-esteem. Establish and maintain child’s connections. Create climate for openly communicating about sexual matters. Compare bullets with group’s responses. Reach consensus. Bridge to discussion of other variables and influences that come into play along with our efforts…i.e., .MEDIA .

SEX is all around us… TV Movies MTV CD covers Popular songs Posters Magazines Billboards Commercials Movies CD covers Posters Books Internet Sexting Telephone 900 #’s

Questions Kids Ask Identify your feelings/values. Identify questions that you cannot answer. Identify resources for gathering needed information.

Dispelling the Myths Be open to communicating about sex. Discuss and model your values. Respond to youth’s emotional needs. Provide accurate and concrete information: e.g., reproduction, contraception, pregnancy, parenthood and STDs.

Contraception Birth control pills Condoms Contraceptive foam/jelly Diaphragm IUD Contraceptive sponge Natural family planning Withdrawal Abstinence Norplant Cervical cap Deprovera shot The patch

Factors that Affect Teen’s Use of Contraceptives Psychological factors Motivational factors Values

Understanding the complexity of sexual development helps the foster parent guide sexual decision-making and sexual responsibility.

I will use information from this training to: __________________________

Acknowledgement Disclaimer This document is provided under a contractual agreement between the   New York State Office of Children and Family Services Division of Administration Bureau of Training and Development AND State University of New York College at Buffalo Acknowledgement This material was developed by the SUNY Buffalo State, Institute for Community Health Promotion (ICHP), Center for Development of Human Services (CDHS) under a training and administrative services agreement with the New York State Office of Children and Family Services. Disclaimer While every effort has been made to provide accurate and complete information, the Office of Children and Family Services and the State of New York assume no responsibility for any errors or omissions in the information provided herein and make no representations or warranties about the suitability of the information contained here for any purpose. All information and documents are provided “as is,” without a warranty of any kind. Copyright © 2015 by the New York State Office of Children and Family Services