“Show, Don’t Tell” by: Linza Todd

Essential Question: How do I make my writing show what’s happening?

What is “Show, Don’t Tell?” A writer's words painting a picture or creating a movie in the mind of the reader. The reader being able to see what’s happening, hear the words, and feel the sensations described by the writer.

“Show, Don’t Tell” Tommy was angry when he heard what the umpire said. Shaking his head back and forth, Tommy pounded home plate with his fist after the umpire shouted, “You’re out!” Teacher: Ok students, please shut your eyes and listen to this sentence. (Read sentence) Now, show me through a series of actions what you saw in your mind. As you see, many of us had different actions; the sentence did not have many details and is telling instead of showing. Teacher: Shut your eyes again and listen to this sentence. (Read second sentence). Again, show me what you saw in your mind. Teacher: Which sentence showed you Tommy’s anger and offered more details? Which sentence painted the most specific picture in your mind? Why?

“Show, Don’t Tell” This sentence painted a clearer picture. Shaking his head back and forth, Tommy pounded home plate with his fist after the umpire shouted, “You’re out!” This sentence painted a clearer picture. Showing what happened rather than simply telling the information, is what makes all the difference!

Strategies writers use to show what is happening include: Describing the character’s actions rather than just saying how he or she feels Using active (vivid) verbs Describing a specific setting

Strategies writers use to show what is happening include: Using similes and metaphors to create images Using dialogue

Strategies writers use to show what is happening include: Showing what the character is thinking Appealing to some of the five senses to paint a picture of what is happening

Revising Tell to Show… The girl cried a lot. (BORING!!!) What are more specific words I could use for girl? What are some other more specific words that mean cry? What is another way to say a lot? Using these suggestions re-write the sentence to show instead of tell.

Revising Tell to Show… The teenager threw herself on her bed and sobbed into the pillow until she fell asleep. The toddler bawled uncontrollably when the storekeeper took the display doll out of her hands. The princess whimpered into her handkerchief when she realized that she had dropped her ring into the raging river. Did you notice how we can derive to many different meanings from the fist sentence (The girl cried a lot.) and how each of these sentences paints a specific picture.

Essential Question: How do I make my writing show what’s happening? Who can give me some of the strategies we discussed to make your writing show what is happening instead of telling?

And remember… Have fun! Writing is Fun!

Practice Sentences The boy nervously waited for the bus. The cat did the trick correctly. The river went over its bank. The deliveryman ran from the dog. The man chewed the meat. The teacher was frustrated.